July 2003 archive

(82 entries)

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July 31, 2003

Happy birthday, J.K. and Harry!

Rowling is our Queen,
Rowling is our Queen,
She's raking all the shillings in*,
Rowling is our Queen...

Rowling will write everything,
She won't leave out a single thing,
That's why all her readers sing:
Rowling is our Queen.

* yes, I am aware that shillings don't exist anymore, but pounds didn't fit and dollars seemed inappropriate. not that shillings isn't. shut up.

Guest blog-entry by another personality in my head

i am sooooooooo excited to see gigli, peeps. it's this one new movie with my boy ben afleck and j-lo she's so pretty, even if this one girl srah says her posture makes her look like donald duck. what is she talkin about ne-way? she dosnt no shizzle about my girl jennifer lopez and how shes from the block but shes still keepin it reel, ya know? like she only has five butlers just like she did back in the day. newayz, aparently this movie is really really a chance for benben and jenny to show there acting skillz. j-lo plays a lesbian but she isnt one in real life, so that has to be hard. and she has to sound like shes from new york city when shes really from the bronx so i bet she had to have some training. but my girl did all that work and i think its really going to pay of. and b diddy hes so hottt and you can tell he really luvs jenny bcuz i herd he gave her a dimond the size of her hed. i dont no about in the movie thou. but i do no im going 2 b 1st in line for tix on friday!

but dont take my word for it, read these reveews. they compare it to glitter, with my girl mariah, so i no its gonna b good!

p.s.: heres another story about the movie. it sounds reely good!

July 30, 2003

Château de cons

This week on The Real World...

I like Ace a lot better since the idiots decided to barricade themselves in their château and refuse all contact with the natives. He is quite snuggly - at least according to Christina, his room- (and apparently sometimes bed-) mate.

His snugglitude was enough to save him when he ate all of Christina (Mme Food Coveter)'s eggs. These people, despite being 7 in a house, are apparently too stupid to have communal groceries. I want to hit them. Christina went off on CT, thinking it was he who had eaten the eggs. Then when Ace confessed, she said he was too snuggly for her to be mad at him. Plus, adds srah, he always looks like he's going to cry. The Real World website says, "Looks like Christina is serving up a scoop of double standard."

Alas, the snugglitude was not enough to save Ace from her wrath after he and CT got drunk and noisily played pool while the others were trying to sleep. CT got drunkenly belligerent and gave the housemates more material for talking about him behind his back. He only ever deserves about half of the abuse they give him, but this group is really good at being snarky and has chosen him as their communal victim. I want to hit them.

Next week's episode looks to be a big fat pile of same ol', same ol', as they continue all of the stupid fights they were having this week and manage to accomplish nothing and never ever move on. I want to hit them.

July 29, 2003

Nous serons des reines! Fichues reines d'âne d'enfer!

I've installed a wee translation thingy in the right column. Do you think it's really worth it when it comes out with things like:

The walk of Ye' ll the board, the scurvy of ye continues!

For anniversary S to celebrate Becky ', we went to re-examine pirates of the Caribbean. By observing all the appropriations love a true member of my family, I found my to call: pirate the trainer of dialect. Not a trainer of dialect for pirates in films, naturally, nor the trainer of dialect for the pirates of Pittsburgh. I will sail the seven seas, teacher of the pirates of beginner to the more authentic noise.

Ye'll walk the plank, ye scurvy dogs!

To celebrate Becky's birthday, we went to see Pirates of the Caribbean again. Watching all of the credits like a true member of my family, I found my calling: pirate dialect coach. Not a dialect coach for pirates in movies, of course, nor dialect coach for the Pittsburgh Pirates. I'll sail the seven seas, teaching novice pirates to sound more authentic.

In other news, I decided I was tired because I was dehydrated, so I've been drinking vast (avast!) amounts of water today. It hasn't helped so far, so I've decided that since I can't remember the last time I had anything citrus-related, I have scurvy instead. Much more pirate-appropriate, anyway.

Deck the halls

Let the bells peal. It's the day after my sisters birthday, and as such 'tis the beginning of the holiday season. Yes, srah's birthday is nearly upon us, and the people will cry out with shouts of joy to recognize the momentus event. Let the countdown begin at 28 days.

Shorty doo-wop

Erica says, of people she knows online, "I think most people are shorter than I think they are." Which makes me wonder... how tall do you think I am?

(No helping from those who have seen me in real life... I would like an objective opinion)

I also find that people, looking at me, think that I am younger than I am, but that people who know me online (at least in the John Hannah milieu) think that I'm older than I am. I suppose I exude a sense of maturity *snort*.

July 28, 2003

We'll be queens! Damn hell ass queens!

With Cheryl's going-away party over, The Gang needed a new project. So our latest endeavour is finding royalty to marry. It's a very difficult process, because you have to find people who fit several criteria: being reasonably close to our own age, not frightening to look at, and high enough on the line of succession that we won't have so many people to kill off that it will look suspicious.

As queens, we will bring new blood and good-old American gumption to the royal houses of Europe. We will do good works. We will arrange matches between our children. We will hook people we know up with peerages and cushy government jobs. We will rule with iron fists and crush our foes!

And will there be monkey-butlers? You bet there will!

Blog-ethics... blethics?

Is it wrong to go back and change things in your blog because you found a funnier way of putting something?

(Note: This is a rhetorical question. I don't actually care if it is or isn't right.)

Learning is fun!

To be added to srah's list of favorite French words: dédaigneusement.

It was a dark and stormy night

This year's Bulwer-Lytton Contest (for the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels) results are online, including:

"When the time came for Timothy to fly the nest, he felt the best years of his life were ahead of him, if only because he had spent the childhood ones living in a nest."
- Sian Arthur - London, England

Glamorous animations

I've been doing a bit of shopping-around for a laptop recently, but I don't know exactly what I want. However, thanks to my computer-advisor, who we will call Robert*, I have found something that looks like it will fit my needs.

* Real name: Bob

You may include 'talented lyricist' in my long list of accomplishments

Happy birthday to Alfie,
Eat lots of alfalfy,
Watch the Duchess of Malfi,
Happy birthday to Alfie!

July 27, 2003

Unconscious Mutterings

Shan't spoil it for the rest of you.

read extended entry... »

A pirate must indulge a little pardonable swagger

I saw my pirate movie last night. Sigh...

It was lovely. There are movies that make me laugh, but my face returns to a neutral movie-watching face after that. This is one of the few that makes me grin. Tho' I'm sure Legolas had something to do with that. Mmmmm.

Pirates are wonderful. If I can be very nerdy for a moment, I think I like them because they have such interesting language. They have muddled, strange accents from being on boats with a mix of people, and they have a vocabulary all their own. I am so going to start saying things like, "I can't bring this ship into Tortuga all by me onesies, savvy?" Johnny Depp's Jack Sparrow reminded me a bit of Ozzy Osbourne, if Ozzy were a pirate. According to IMDb, he based the character on Keith Richards.

You couldn't make a movie with the dastardly pirates fighting with the heroic navy. It wouldn't work, because they audience will always side with the pirates. As bad as real-life pirates were, literary/cinematic pirates are lovable, if only because they're usually not very good at piracy. I even liked the bad pirates.

I have found a career path after all. Two years at the School of Information, then it's the pirate's life for me.

I've got a fever! And the only prescription.. is more cowbell!

Spent last night alternating between ~~downloading mp3s~~ being a good, upstanding moral citizen of these here United States and running to the other room to watch Saturday Night Live's Best of Will Ferrell episode. The highlights were James Lipton's invention of the word scrumtralescent and Dissing Your Dog, which is exactly the same dog-training strategy I've been employing for years.

July 26, 2003

'One more lesson like that and I might just do a Weasley.'

I did wonder about a few of these lines while reading Order of the Phoenix, but I certainly didn't catch all of them:

Order of the Phoenix Fun-Tastic Innuendo List

[via Somewhat, Muchly]

July 25, 2003

Serious linguistic discussion between serious linguists

Jez and I were IMing about important and useful phrases to learn before travelling abroad. We came up with the following. Don't say I never taught you anything.

Felmelegítené ezt a cuclisüveget?

Kann ich ein Opernglas ausleiben?

Godmorgen, mit navn er - Hvadbehager? - mit navn er - Hvadbehager? - Mit navn er... Slim Shady.

Prescriptive? But of course.

While watching TV last night, I noted three times that a character said "me" when he meant "I" or vice versa. I realize that people do talk like that in real life, but to do so on TV is just going to encourage people to speak English badly. I'm sure it happens on TV all the time, but it just got to me last night and drove me insane.

Use "I" as the object of a preposition and fear my wrath. Constant vigilance!

Incendium!

Ann Arbor is aflame and no one cares. The blaze:

is expected to take several days to completely extinguish
is taking out a whole block
necessitated the assistance of three neighbouring fire departments
had huge cranes dumping water from above
created a smoke cloud visible from Dearborn and Detroit Metro Airport, and
caused enormous traffic back-ups from idiots (yours truly included) driving towards the smoke cloud to locate the fire and gawk.

And this is all I can find online.

July 24, 2003

And yet more of The Real World

It was the third of June
On that younger day
Well I became a man
At the hands of a girl
Almost twice my age
- Neil Diamond, "Desiree"

For those of you who moved back to France just to avoid watching this show, I will torture you with the latest: Leah is mean and no one likes her. She has a brother named Pascual who is in 10th grade and who comes to visit. Christina and Mallory fight over Pascual. Mallory and Simon (!!!) smooch around in a club ("You know, Simon, you're a really good kisser." "Thanks. You're quite good yourself."). Mallory goes and hooks up with Pascual. Leah doesn't like that. Eventually Mallory and Leah talk it over and become beeeeeeeeeest frieeeeeeeeeends again. Hooray.

Based on drive-to-work conversation

How many characters on Head of the Class can you name, just off the top of your head?

One of the IMDb user comments:

Stretching the realms of plausibility is what makes sitcoms great! Well, actually, Alex P. Keaton is what makes sitcoms great. And he's not in this. So, it ain't great. And, what's more, it stretches the realms of plausibility. The students in the class are geeky. A little too geeky if you know what I mean. And they never get beaten up! I smell a rat, and that rat is of alien form. Yes, I think it is fairly obvious that the only explanation for their super- intelligence and their physical invulnerability is that they are extra- terrestrials planning an invasion. Impossible? Remember, Robin Williams looked human in Mork and Mindy. I rest my case.

Votre dévouée élève, qui vous aime de tout son coeur

While reading The Professor (thanks for suggesting it, Katie), I was full of fantasies about updating it (à la Pride & Prejudice/Bridget Jones), writing a novel loosely based on it, or bringing it to the big screen. The book is about an Englishman who is unhappy in his work, so he goes off to Belgium and teaches English. I like it despite the protagonist's airs of grandeur, because there are parts that remind me of my experiences as a teaching assistant in France.

No man likes to acknowledge that he has made a mistake in the choice of his profession, and every man, worthy of the name, will row long against wind and tide before he allows himself to cry out, "I am baffled!" and submits to be floated passively back to land. (Chapter 4)

That reminds me of this post about never ever leaving a job.

Belgium! name unromantic and unpoetic, yet name that whenever uttered has in my ear a sound, in my heart an echo, such as no other assemblage of syllables, however sweet or classic, can produce. Belgium! I repeat the word, now as I sit alone near midnight. It stirs my world of the past like a summons to resurrection; the graves unclose, the dead are raised; thoughts, feelings, memories that slept, are seen by me ascending from the clods--haloed most of them--but while I gaze on their vapoury forms, and strive to ascertain definitely their outline, the sound which wakened them dies, and they sink, each and all, like a light wreath of mist, absorbed in the mould, recalled to urns, resealed in monuments. (Chapter 7)

Believe it or not, I do feel that way when I hear "Vichy" or "Grenoble" or sometimes even just "France". Maybe not to that extent, but I'm not a character in a Brontë novel, either.

"Would you object to taking the boys as they are, and testing their proficiency in English?"

The proposal was unexpected. I had thought I should have been allowed at least 3 days to prepare; but it is a bad omen to commence any career by hesitation, so I just stepped to the professor's desk near which we stood, and faced the circle of my pupils. I took a moment to collect my thoughts, and likewise to frame in French the sentence by which I proposed to open business. I made it as short as possible:--

"Messieurs, prenez vos livres de lecture."

"Anglais ou Francais, monsieur?" demanded a thickset, moon-faced young Flamand in a blouse. The answer was fortunately easy:--

"Anglais."

I determined to give myself as little trouble as possible in this lesson; it would not do yet to trust my unpractised tongue with the delivery of explanations; my accent and idiom would be too open to the criticisms of the young gentlemen before me, relative to whom I felt already it would be necessary at once to take up an advantageous position, and I proceeded to employ means accordingly. (Chapter 7)

Thrown into classes and frightened of your French being mocked by your students? Sound familiar?

She liked to learn, but hated to teach; her progress as a pupil depended upon herself, and I saw that on herself she could calculate with certainty; her success as a teacher rested partly, perhaps chiefly, upon the will of others; it cost her a most painful effort to enter into conflict with this foreign will, to endeavour to bend it into subjection to her own; for in what regarded people in general the action of her will was impeded by many scruples; it was as unembarrassed as strong where her own affairs were concerned, and to it she could at any time subject her inclination, if that inclination went counter to her convictions of right; yet when called upon to wrestle with the propensities, the habits, the faults of others, of children especially, who are deaf to reason, and, for the most part, insensate to persuasion, her will sometimes almost refused to act; then came in the sense of duty, and forced the reluctant will into operation. A wasteful expense of energy and labour was frequently the consequence; Frances toiled for and with her pupils like a drudge, but it was long ere her conscientious exertions were rewarded by anything like docility on their part, because they saw that they had power over her, inasmuch as by resisting her painful attempts to convince, persuade, control--by forcing her to the employment of coercive measures--they could inflict upon her exquisite suffering. Human beings--human children especially--seldom deny themselves the pleasure of exercising a power which they are conscious of possessing, even though that power consist only in a capacity to make others wretched; a pupil whose sensations are duller than those of his instructor, while his nerves are tougher and his bodily strength perhaps greater, has an immense advantage over that instructor, and he will generally use it relentlessly, because the very young, very healthy, very thoughtless, know neither how to sympathize nor how to spare. Frances, I fear, suffered much; a continual weight seemed to oppress her spirits[...] (Chapter 16)

Frances, another teacher at the school, takes English lessons with some of her students, just as I did in Spanish at Valéry Larbaud. She likes to learn, doesn't like to teach, and is intimidated by some of her students.

"Confound it! How doggedly self-approving the lad looks! I thought he was fit to die with shame, and there he sits grinning smiles, as good as to say, 'Let the world wag as it will, I've the philosopher's stone in my waist-coat pocket, and the elixir of life in my cupboard; I'm independent of both Fate and Fortune'" (Chapter 22)

Never mind. I'm just a nerd.

July 22, 2003

Meesa meejahoor

I am what Meg calls a meejahoor. Recently I have been constantly trying to read four or five books at the same time and watching movies when I come up for a breath of non-literary air. I think this is because I was deprived of English-language books and movies (or at least of selection) in France and I'm now so inundated with them that I gave myself and get in over my head. Read/viewed within the past week:

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - it's a reread, but an interesting one, what with all I've learned in book 5. I like it when Sirius tells the gang, "If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals."

Mr Darcy's Daughters - I couldn't get all the way through this. I tried, but I've finally come to the conclusion that I can't read sequels written by other people. They never have exactly the right voice, and there's an odd tendency to put modern concepts into Jane Austen books. This very dumb book does it too. I'm not disputing that there were homosexuals then, but there aren't openly gay characters in Austen's books, and putting them there feels all wrong. It's like published fan fiction.

Diary of an American Au Pair - A bit of travel-fluff. I love travel-fluff. I like the trend of Bridget-Jones-single-gal novels when I need something light to read, and it's even better when there's culture shock to boot.

A Mighty Wind - I went to see this with my parents this weekend, and no one in the theater laughed as hard as we did. I think Best in Show was slightly better just because it had fewer characters to keep track of, but this was still mighty good and had fun music. "I think Crabbeville in autumn would look quite magnificent."

Writing the Novel - It was a book about writing novels. It made me feel a lot better about having no idea what I wanted to write about and reaffirmed some of the things I'd read elsewhere:

"Characters take on a life of their own and insist upon supplying their own dialogue."

"It's encouraging to note that we're in the majority, that most writers have been obsessed with the idea of becoming writers before the nature of what they might write about revealed itself to them. [...] The identification of self as writer comes for most of us before we know what sort of writer we'll be or what we'll write about..."

"I learned quickly that my self-image as a writer was stronger than my self-image as a potential great novelist. I didn't really care all that deeply about artistic achievement, nor did I aspire to wealth beyond the dreams of avarice. I wanted to write something and see it in print. I don't know that that's the noblest of motives for doing anything, but it was at the very core of my being."

The Professor - Lovely. Will eventually have a post all to itself.

Shanghai Knights - Not as good as the first one, but what sequel is? Still pretty enjoyable. "I'm a thirty year old waiter/gigolo. Where's the future in that?"

Greenfingers - Not spectacular, but rather cute. It's a movie about inmates in a British prison who discover a love for gardening.

Farm Fatale - I can't stop reading this woman's books, even though I don't really like them. I don't know who I do like in the fluffy-single-girl genre, so I just keep reading what I know, even if I don't like it. Any suggestions?

Zazie dans le métro - I'm in the middle of this one, but it's already overdue so I'm afraid I'll have take it back to the library before I finish. A little girl comes to Paris, wants to ride in the metro, the metro's on strike, she runs away... not a whole lot of action, but the dialogue is interesting because it's written the way people talk, with "cexé" for "ce que c'est" and things like that.

America's Sweethearts - Bof. Lots of dislikable characters. Julia Roberts was okay. "I really want to play a character like a The Terminator. The Hispanic people are crying out to see a deadly, destructive, killing machine that they can embrace as their own."

Kate & Leopold - This must be Meg Ryan's last single-gal-in-the-city romantic comedy. She should have stopped before this one. She was too old for the movie and too old for Hugh Jackman and Liev Shreiber. She can still make divorced-mother-of-three romantic comedies or branch off into something else, but I really don't want to see her doing this anymore.

Plus, she looked like she was going to cry during the whole movie.

Plus, I hate time-travel.

In the director's cut, there's a scene at the beginning where Meg Ryan's character is doing media research on a movie and someone claims that your main character doesn't need to be likable all the time. Meg Ryan doesn't agree, and he argues that she probably isn't likable all the time. She responds, "I'm not the protagonist in a major motion picture." But she is. And she's not likable. So it doesn't work.

Victoria's Daughters - I just started this last night, so they've only just been born. I'm quite liking it, though. I do like a bit of non-fiction from time to time.

To speak, or not to speak?

When Robin and I bought crêpes at Art Fair, the fellow making the crêpes had a French accent. I wanted to speak French to him, but I couldn't think of anything to say. Afterwards, I told my mother how I was kicking myself for having said nothing and my mom was disappointed. She thinks that I should use my powers for good whenever I have the chance. I think she fears that if I don't get into the practice of using them for good, I'll turn to evil. No one wants to be Lex Luthor's mom. I myself was disappointed to have passed up an opportunity to practice, out of fear that I'll eventually lose my French altogether.

Robin, on the other hand, didn't think I should have said anything. "When you were in France," she said, "would you have wanted strangers to speak English to you just because they could?" She's right - I usually end up getting insulted when I say something in French and people respond in English.

On the other hand, it might be nice to hear your native language in a polylingual desert like Michigan. Who knows? What do you think?

By the way

I'm guest-blogging at So Joyful! this week while Katie is off (ugh) communing with nature. Come on over if you'd like to read my series of pirate-themed posts. Arrrrrrrrrrr.

1000 comments!

Jezebel wins with his clever me me me me me comment!

Pardon me while I spew into a Paige™ box

Construction continues. The building is shaking. It's not a pleasant massage-like vibration, but a sort of constant horrible shaking that gives one a feeling rather reminiscent of being car-sick. Bleaaaaaaargh.

Says the pro/am translator:

Another of my favorite French words: nombreux. I like it because it sounds nice and because it is one of the unusual adjectives that goes before the noun.

srah | 11:02 AM | TrackBack | Tags: french |

The Thursday This-or-That?

1) DVD or VHS? DVD! My family watches everything with subtitles on, because we never understand anything anyone says. We are movie-readers. I like to watch things in Spanish with French subtitles or in Japanese with German subtitles or in Swedish with Pig Latin subtitles. My family prefers English All Around. I like DVDs for the extras, too.
2) Best Literary/Movie Villan: Voldemort (Harry Potter) or Sauron (LoTR)? Awww, they're two different species. I suppose I prefer Voldemort because I know more about him and who he is and why he went bad. I'm sure if I read some of the other Tolkien books, that would be revealed to me about Sauron, but I haven't done so yet.
3) Meat: rare or well-done? Somewhere in the middle. I like it pink and tender and I don't mind a bit of reddish juice as long as the blood isn't gushing out.
4) High Speed Internet-Cable or DSL? DSL! DSL! Actually, High-Speed Internet Cable might be faster, but the word "cable" is taboo in our household.
5) Women: 1-piece bathing suit or Bikini? One piece, down to my elbows and knees, full of ruffles and flounces and with a little cap to go with it.
6) To be fair--Men: Boxers or briefs? Boxers, because you hardly ever see plaid briefs. And I don't really want to, thankyouverymuch.
7) Beer or Liquor/Wine? Beer is icky-poo.
8) Coke or Mountain Dew? Pop is also icky-poo, but sometimes I have a craving for Coke with pizza or some other junkyish foods. Mountain Dew is vile.
9) In honor of my 10/18/03 nuptials: Morning or Afternoon/Night Wedding? You can have a night wedding? That sounds like fun. Then you could serve waffles and scrambled eggs at the reception.
10) Carpet or Hardwood Floors I think I prefer vacuuming to mopping, but hardwood floors are prettier. So I'll go with carpet until I have my own horde of slaves.
11) American cars or foreign? Furren. I liked my Honda Civic and I like the VW Jetta because I sat in one at the Detroit Auto Show and it had adjustable up-down seats for short people. I want a plaid Mini.
12) Cutest TV Twin: Mary-Kate or Ashley Olsen? For real. What? Who cares?
13) Coffee: Caffeinated or Decaf? Ice cream.
14) Thought-Provoking Question of the Week: Computers: Do they make life better or worse? Why? Life is neither better nor worse for computers - just different. I don't think life has improved because of computers. I think it's changed, but I don't think we can make judgments about the quality of life in the past. Either that or Yes, my life is vastly improved by computers because I love them to bits. You know, one or the other.

1000? Who are you people?

I would just like to point out that the 1000th comment on this blog since the move to MT is coming up. I had never thought to count comments before, so I have no idea how many are on the old blog, waiting the years it will take for me to be ready to import them. 1000 is unfathomable to me. Who will it be? Who will it be???

Those three little... letters

DEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ESSSSSSSSSSS ELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

July 21, 2003

¡Ayudame!

I tried to call Alex in Mexico, thinking that this time I wouldn't be silly and try to speak Spanish to him. Problem being: Alex wasn't there. Don't know who was, but she didn't speak English.

Ella: Lksjro;isjeofjsoiejfisejfliisje;lifje
Yo: May I speak to Alex?
Ella: ¿Lkjw;oeijfowe;jfioweinfwe quien?
Yo: ¿Con Alex?
Ella: ¿Ljolsijeofisjifjlisejflseijflisje assistantes liwnelinwleifniwe?
Yo: ¿Uh... sí?
Ella: Lkwjeoinfwenofiwen numero. ¿Tiene pluma?
Yo: ¿Qué? ¿Qué? ¿Pluma? ¿Ah... sí?
Ella: Bueno. 982340923842092384308204092348.
Yo: (writing down various numbers that have no relation to the ones she gave me) ¿...2348?
Ella: Sí. Wlerjiowjfnk assistantes owiejroiwjeroiwjer llamar lwejrwiejrojwer.
Yo: Okay, okay, mmm hmmm. Gracias.
Ella: Hasta luego.
Yo: Au revoir. (immediately smacks self in forehead for speaking French)

Extremely traumatic. I should be warned when I'm going to have to speak Spanish. I should be prepared. I'm going to have a heart attack.

'It's a pretty long article about why her hair is brown'

Cheryl, adding the description above, sent me a Mandy Moore interview that, among other things, talks about her next movie (Mandy's, not Cheryl's):

In "Saved," due out this fall, she seems to mock her own righteous image in a story about a teenager attending a Christian school who tries to "save" her gay friend by having sex with him -- and winds up pregnant. "It could be quite controversial," Moore says slyly of the film in which she co-stars with Macaulay Culkin. Moore plays the friend of the pregnant girl (played by Jena Malone).

I wouldn't dream of making a judgment about this movie, except to say SERIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY. I just hope that the pregnant girl's name is Belle.

'West Bloomfield and Troy: Where it's not happening'

The Detroit Free Press is running a series of articles "exploring Gov. Jennifer Granholm's idea that Michigan needs to create 'cool cities' to keep young people from moving away." This series has been running for a few weeks or so, and they are up to Troy and West Bloomfield, of which they say:

It would be something of a stretch to call Troy and West Bloomfield "cool."

OK, some would consider it an outright lie.

I don't even live there and it makes me want to move away. Have they run out of cool cities already, so that they have to cover this? Maybe there are good things about Troy and West Bloomfield. Let's keep reading.

Troy and West Bloomfield are representative of many affluent communities in Michigan that simply don't need coolness to prosper. Housing values soar and strip malls multiply like gerbils despite the fact that both communities essentially pull their shades by 11 p.m.

What's that I hear? Is it the sound of young Troy-and-West-Bloomfieldites picking up stakes?

Between 1990 and 2000, the number of 20- to 34-year-olds in Troy declined by 12 percent. In West Bloomfield, a community of 65,000 residents and 26 lakes, the drop was 20 percent.

Despite this trend, there has been little movement in either community to create the kind of defined, downtown entertainment hub that has brought young professionals -- and their wallets -- to Birmingham. One obvious reason for that is Troy and West Bloomfield have no downtowns. These communities are products of the auto age. They're geared for driving and parking, not walking. And they are filled with handsome brick homes and well-manicured yards, with subdivisions sporting vaguely English-sounding titles like Chatfield Commons. The artist lofts, smoky clubs and odd little shops seen in cities that evolved before the car are nowhere present. In their stead, Troy and West Bloomfield have chain restaurants, Linens 'n Things and Home Depot. [...]

In West Bloomfield, township officials are discussing the creation of a pedestrian-friendly neighborhood filled with shops and restaurants. [...]

Troy is likewise proud of its newly constructed community center, skateboard park and aquatic center, which have drawn teens and young professionals from the malls, at least for a while. [...]

The community center features an indoor pool and mini-water park and a huge health club. It also has a teen room, with a home-theater system, foosball, pool and air-hockey tables and video equipment. Though any teenager with aspirations of coolness will surely wince at the "This Place Rocks!" banners the city has plastered to the walls. [...]

I would like to point out that the previous sentence isn't really a sentence.

Troy officials say they hope to supplement these facilities one day with a conference center, hotel, amphitheater, butterfly garden and in-line skating paths.

For now, though, both communities seem content to stand outside the velvet rope of hipness and and have little desire to emulate Birmingham and Royal Oak.

So in the end, we come to the conclusion that Troy and West Bloomfield are cool because they have no young people and are packed with chain restaurants. Apparently this is what Michigan has to offer.

Attack of the Crayfish!!!

It's quite disappointing that such a prolific creative genius as my own was allowed to wither on the vine. Or something.

We just got a new computer chez McN*tt and are in the process of transferring files from the old computer to the new one. In doing so, I've come across files that were transferred from an even older computer, and which date back to as early as 1987. It's full of stories I wrote in elementary and middle school, fragments of stories I never finished, story ideas, and all kinds of creative energy.

They are crap.

But at least I was writing crap. I've always loved to write, but I started getting busy with schoolwork in high school and my creative writing was replaced by uncreative report-writing. I don't think I've actually written anything but silly little song lyrics since 10th grade or so. It saddens me, and I think I really ought to get started again. I'm quite looking forward to NaNoWriMo, and I hope I won't be too busy to participate.

Plungey plungey plungey

We had a surprise going-away party yesterday for Cheryl, who is off to Kent State in the fall. I am a horrible secret-keeper and kept wanting to blurt it out, so it's really best that we had it as early as we did. As it was, I had trouble not blurting out what her presents were as I handed them to her.

As I recall, I don't think I've ever been involved in a surprise party. Maybe I'm not invited. Maybe my reputation precedes me.

July 20, 2003

We don't need no water

I thought I might put in an ad for my partners in the Burn It! CD Swap (and make it easier for me to find them by having them all in one place. I like to pretend I'm doing this for non-selfish reasons, though. So ignore everything between these parentheses. You're already reading it? Drat.). They are:

Kyle Flood at KFlood Dot Net
Naked Armed and Dangerous
single smash

Hope you folks like furren music and The Neil, because that's all I listen to. Ha ha!

Unconscious Mutterings

Once again, I'll hide them in the extension for your non-spoiling pleasure.

read extended entry... »

srah | 11:49 AM | TrackBack | Tags: memes, unconscious mutterings |

July 18, 2003

srah's Art Fair recap

I went to Art Fair this morning with Robin, and I think I may have actually gotten a tan. Yes, I can definitely see a bit of color there...

Oh wait, no. That was dirt. I am as white as ever. Never mind.

There is an astonishing amount of child labor at the Art Fair. It's summer, so I suppose the parents can't leave them at home, and Cute Sells, so there they are, hawking their lemonade and butterfly fries while the grown-ups cook them.

My dad and I bought some sweet potato butterfly fries last night, and although they were rather tasty, a nice pool of grease collected at the bottom of the plate. The man behind us in line asked the twelve-year-old vendor if there was any way he could get some cheese on them things. The TYOV told him no, although there was a vat o' cheese right behind him for some other food. I think it just didn't occur to the TYOV that cheese from one food could be applied to another, but I like to think that he was denying the man the right to be disgusting. You go, young person!

July 17, 2003

I have a confession to make:

Whenever I hear the name Keira Knightley, I think instead of Keisha Knight Pulliam.

Truth or Dare

This is more of a survey than a meme, I find. Care to answer yourself?

1. Do you have a disclaimer on your blog?
No.

2. If yes, what prompted you to post one?
Haven't got one. And I don't have one... because I don't think anyone would read it anyway.

3. When you go to a new blog or read one that you've visited before, how often are you offended by the content? What do you do when this happens (email the writer privately, comment, ignore it, etc)?
Not very often. I usually ignore it, unless someone says something that's flat-out wrong, in which case I might take a moment to correct them. If they're blogging opinions, though, I leave them alone. This is their space, and if I don't like it, I leave. I am rarely offended by the content of my regular blogs, which is why they are regular blogs. If I'm regularly offended, they'll eventually drop off the blogroll.

4. On the blogs that you read, how much of the content do you think is dramatized?
If by "dramatized", you mean "made-up", I think very little is. I think many of the blogs I read are, however, expressed rather dramatically. That's what makes them fun. Things are presented in a way that makes them stand out from the everyday, even if they are everyday things.

5. Do you dramatize your own posts?
I don't make much up, but I do tend to lean to the creative. I may present things in a different way than others might see them, but I don't think I invent.

6. If you do dramatize your blog posts, why do you do it?
See question #4. I want to be interesting. I want to see my life as something exciting and unusual, and I want other people to do so too. If I get bored with life, what's the point?

7. If you do dramatize your blog posts, do you keep a separate journal (online or off) where you document events and emotions that are more realistic/accurate?
No. My life is odd because I see it that way, or vice versa. I don't think I need a separate journal at this point.

8. Have you ever blogged something that was totally made up but blogged it as though it were real?
Not intending it to be taken seriously. I probably threaten to kill people and claim to explode, but it's all hyperbole.

9. How did your blog come to be?
I had come across not.so.soft several times while doing John Hannah searches, because she mentioned him once. It seemed strange to have your life online. I think I read Annica's next, and since An was doing it, it seemed to make sense. I fiddled around with Blogger (because both of the previously mentioned blogs were done with that service) while I was in Grenoble, but didn't get into it, then it clicked for some reason in the fall of my senior year in college. The time was right, I suppose.

10. Some blogs take on a life of their own that is totally unexpected, would you say this is true with your blog?
Only that i didn't expect to actually get into it and that I don't think I would have imagined it would have the place in my life that it has.

11. Describe, in general, what a blog is as if I had no idea what it was.
A blog. Weblog. It's like an online journal. It's like a journal, but it's online. I write about things that happen to me or things that are going on in my life. Other people sometimes just post links. What's the point? I don't know. Listen, just take a look at a few and maybe you'll get it.

12. Describe, specifically, what your blog is to you.
It's my Pensieve. It's where I put all of my thoughts so that they stop knocking around in my head. I work out a surprising lot through my blog, given the dearth of serious content. In France, it also managed to replace a lot of letters and emails and phone calls and help me keep in touch with the folks back home.

[via stuff and whatever]

srah | 12:00 AM | TrackBack | Tags: memes |

July 16, 2003

Thon-tha-thon-thon-thon

I've sponsored Krista for Blogathon, since I won't be blogging myself. I've always meant to blog a thon, but the fates are agin' me agin' this year, so I'm sponsoring instead. If you'd like to do something kindly, you might do so as well.

We'll collect the moments one by one/ I guess that's how the future's done - Feist, 'Mushaboom'

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