Entries tagged with "health"
Get up offa that thing/ And walk 'til clothes fit better
posted by srah on May 23, 2008 12:57 PM
In news tangentially related to the Butler Gas Station Did It'">previous post, I went to the doctor the other week for my allergies (she actually believed I was sick this time!) and they weighed me. My weight tends to fluctuate within about a 10-pound range, but it had fluctuated out of that range to the point where I was eligible to give blood. Oops! I didn't think too much of it until I started realizing that my pants were a little tight this week, and that I also hadn't recorded my steps on Walker Tracker in a month or more,...
All the decisions have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs...
posted by srah on February 27, 2008 11:25 AM
I have been eating a lot of peanut butter this week. This can mean only one of two things: My body is telling me, "Sarah, we¹ need more protein! We will make you crave peanut butter so that you will put more protein in us!" OR My body is telling me, "Sarah, you bought peanut butter on impulse at the store last week. Why did you waste money on peanut butter when you don't even like peanut butter? We have to use that stuff up!" I don't know why my body is so concerned with my spending habits. ¹ My...
Tomorrow is another day! Fiddle-dee-dee!
posted by srah on January 30, 2008 6:47 PM
January 24 is supposed to be the worst day of the year, but for my money, it's January 30. The blogosphere sounds cranky today, I couldn't sleep last night, I had so much work to do today, crazy amounts of multi-tasking had to be done to get things finished (which they are, sort of, almost, or will be by the time they need to be, I think) and everyone around me is sick. I almost wish I were sick. I always get sick when no one else is sick, and then when things are going around and striking down half...
Ah do-run-run-run?
posted by srah on January 30, 2008 12:54 PM
Tags: employee health and well-being, health, running, walking
(The most annoying thing about blogging is that the posts do not write themselves. I have been making notes all week and am only now catching up on actually writing out the damned things.) My favorite office on campus, the Office of Employee Health and Well-Being, has come through again with yet another exciting activity. Starting last Monday, I am now a member of Team [University I Work At], a training program for a 5k run/walk race in April. I originally thought that I would just sign up for the race and not waste $20 on the training sessions, but...
'Tis makin' me kind o' sick
posted by srah on November 20, 2007 6:40 AM
Tags: health, hypochondria, nablopomo, nablopomo 2007
Unpleasant: Staying home sick from work on Monday. Worse: Hearing on Tuesday morning that there is a case of bacterial meningitis running around campus somewhere. They've contacted all the students who would have had contact with Student Zero, but I have a feeling that the don't ever ask about grownups whose office they went to and coughed on. I don't have any of the primary symptoms (high fever, headache, and stiff neck) but I did have a few of the secondary ones (nausea, confusion, and sleepiness). My first thought was "AIEEEEEEEE! I have it! I have to go get diagnosed!"...
Overnight, there's been a breathless change in you
posted by srah on November 15, 2007 10:56 PM
Tags: haiku, health, nablopomo, nablopomo 2007, poetry, weather
Well hello, and welcome to my living room blog. It's a Multi-Stanza Weather-Haiku Extravaganza! And you're all invited! Last night: wore no coat This morning: need light jacket Right now: OH GOD, SNOW! Forty-one degrees Where the hell did that come from? Should have brought a hat What be these white flakes? Be it snow, or do the gods Need Head & Shoulders? Accident'ly punched the microwave. Unrelated to weather, sorry. My hand is bleeding Next time I'll punch you HARDER! Curse you, microwave! Oh, back to weather. Now they're forecasting showers. We'll be wet AND cold. I'm not crying...
A person can develop the flu/ The flu, a hundred and three point two
posted by srah on November 2, 2007 7:10 PM
Tags: employee health and well-being, flu shot, health, nablopomo, nablopomo 2007
[Note to those of you who have suggested themes/lyrics: I am going to try to use your suggestions, especially when my everyday life doesn't inspire me. Just because I haven't used them yet doesn't mean I won't. Keep suggesting!] The yearly question once again raises its head: to flu shot, or not to flu shot? I've gotten by without flu shots for my whole life so far and don't usually get hit very hard in flu season (just enough to take a sick day off work and some time to take care of myself), but on the other hand, I...
Blah blah blah exercise blah blah fiber
posted by srah on July 6, 2007 12:45 PM
Tags: employee health and well-being, exercise, health, low-carb diet
I went to my weekly core-based toning class yesterday, offered through the Office of Employee Health and Well-Being (they do offer us a lot of opportunities to take care of ourselves here!). We seemed to focus a lot on the obliques. Obliques? I didn't even know I had obliques. I have certainly never used them before. I seem to manage to go through life, never putting myself in situations where my obliques are in any way stretched. So I contorted myself into all kinds of ridiculous positions to use my newfound obliques for the first time, and today they are...
Dream
posted by srah on June 5, 2007 5:17 PM
Tags: dream, eye, health, insulin resistance
I told everyone at work yesterday that I called in sick yesterday morning because I baked cookies on Sunday night and sampled my wares a little too much. This is the truth, but it is not the whole truth. As a result of my late-night sugar binging, my blood sugar dropped during the night and I woke up a zombie. Normally when I wake up with low-blood-sugar-zombie syndrome, I just eat some breakfast, take my pills and get on with my morning (or I assume I have the flu because I'm stupid and I forget sometimes that I am now...
If I meet him in heaven, I'm leaving
posted by srah on March 29, 2007 6:45 PM
Tags: books, comics, employee health and well-being, health, mitch albom, unshelved
I recently signed up for a lunchtime program sponsored by the Office of Employee Health and Well-Being, where participants are all supposed to walk from their workplaces to a designated place on campus, then learn about something related to happy/healthy living. I skipped the first week because the theme was line dancing, which makes me the opposite of happy. Then after I signed up, I found that the last week - which was supposed to be about "journaling" - has been replaced with something that threatens to make me even less happy than line dancing: a book discussion about Mitch...
Stirring and stirring and stirring my brew
posted by srah on January 11, 2007 12:25 PM
First my dentist had a problem with me drinking sugary tea. Now there are reports that milk cancels out all those health benefits that we, the tea-addicted, were happy to hear we were accidentally getting. I can't help but feel personally persecuted by Science. Curse you, Science! Why are you out to ruin my daily (or several times daily) cuppa? If it isn't Science who's at the bottom of all this, I suspect it's all a conspiracy by the mint/oolong tea industries to get me, the main consumer of all the tea in the whole world, to switch away from...
No thank you, fish make love in it
posted by srah on January 4, 2007 6:18 PM
Tags: dentist, health, tea, water
I went to the dentist yesterday for the first time in almost two years (I know, I am a filthy horrible person and I am ashamed) and learned that I have some cavities (I am even more ashamed, thank you). At least she didn't say anything about gingivitis. The dentist said that from the type and location of the cavities, she could deduce that they were probably caused by drinking sugary liquids... liquids like... tea with sugar. She's like House! She said that I didn't necessarily need to stop or even cut down on the tea or the sugar, but...
Yakity yak, don't talk back
posted by srah on November 29, 2006 8:35 PM
Tags: health, ophthalmologist, vision
I went to the ophthalmologist today for my yearly checkup. The diagnosis: I still have the same number of eyes I had at this time last year. Yay! I really like going to the ophthalmologist, and I don't know why that is. I dread going to the dentist and I have no particular fondness for other doctor's appointments, but I look forward to eye appointments and the opportunity to show off my letter-reading skills and to see the veins on the inside of my eye when a light gets flashed on it. The only thing that bothered me was that...
Doctor Piglet, Doctor Winston, practice your art
posted by srah on October 28, 2006 6:53 PM
Tags: alfie, concussion, health
Good news! I do not have a concussion... I think. This afternoon I went a-returnin' things that I bought before my trip, which I later decided I didn't need. When I got to the mall in Cincinnati, I opened my truck to get out the shoebox, reached in, and the FIERCE STRONG WINDS blew the trunk lid down on my head. Tears came to my eyes and I sort of stumbled through the parking lot in a haze, wondering if I had a concussion. I returned my shoes, wandered in and out of stores, checked my pupils in the restroom...
Because you're mine, I walk online
posted by srah on September 6, 2006 8:36 PM
Tags: health, pedometer, sports, steps, walkertracker, walking
Thanks to Ed, I have discovered Walker Tracker, which has many of the features of the previous step-tracking site I was using, but with more community interaction and graphs! Read my step logger! Watch my progress go up and down! Join this one now!...
Pedometerphile
posted by srah on August 31, 2006 12:55 PM
Tags: health, pedometer, steps, steptracker, walking
Apete gave me a pedometer for my birthday. It is just like his, so rather than saying "How many steps have you taken so far? Is that a lot? How many did you do yesterday? I wonder how many I did. Do you think I did a lot?" I can track my own steps. So far, the best way I've found to keep track of my steps is with Steptracker. That way I can keep track of how many steps I did, and I can make a "comments" field to try to record my activities during the day and see...
So anyway, this all sucks
posted by srah on April 4, 2006 5:03 PM
Tags: doctor, glucose intolerance, health, insulin resistance, low-carb diet, polycystic ovary syndrome
I had a doctor's appointment yesterday wherein I learned that I am, it would appear, a fat old woman trapped in a tiny young body. As she diagnosed me with PCOS and some glucose intolerance (both related to the diabetes that runs in my family), she kept telling me how unusual it was for me to have these problems because they're usually found in obese people who are older than me and "YOU'RE ONLY 25! AND YOU WEIGH 111 POUNDS¹!" Yeah, that doesn't really make me feel any better. I was told for years that the way to avoid diabetes-related...
Our second and third place contestants will receive... Scooby Doo band-aids!
posted by srah on February 22, 2006 9:18 PM
Tags: health, insulin resistance, moving, ohio, on my own, polycystic ovary syndrome
This morning, I took the Glucose Challenge and I won! At least... I think I won. They're going to let me know. I guess they have to wait for the voting public to weigh in. Actually, come to think of it, I don't remember seeing any of the other contestants. Or any cameras. This is the worst reality show ever! Well, that ate two hours out of my life. Actually, it ate a lot more, if you count all the time I spent thinking about food when I was supposed to be fasting 10-12 hours before the test. And if...
The paranoid ramblings of a druggie
posted by srah on January 25, 2006 12:44 PM
Tags: day-quil, health, medicine
I woke up this morning and felt as though someone had removed my eyeballs during the night, gouging them out and enlarging the sockets. They had then stuffed my sinuses and brain cavity with cotton, set it on fire and replaced the eyeballs, putting them in the wrong sockets and clumsily caulking them into place. I forced myself to get out of bed, but my one and only desire was to fall head-first on the carpet, crumple into a ball and moan about the evil that had been done to my head. I tried to convince myself to get up...
Hypochondriac, diagnose thyself!
posted by srah on January 10, 2006 4:31 PM
Tags: health, hypochondria
It's all right, folks. I have survived my brush with death. All is well now. I was concerned, this afternoon, that I was suffering from some kind of Wrist Flu. I felt just fine, but my wrists (my right one in particular) was extremely sweaty. It was so sweaty that I kept leaving puddles on the mousepad and the keyboard wrist-rest. I had to roll up my sleeve because the wrist of my sweater was sopping wet. As my boss had already left for the day after warning us not to come near him for fear of catching his lightheadedqueasiness,...
I like Inuktitut!
posted by srah on November 21, 2005 5:05 PM
If I had to pick a week in which to get a papercut under my fingernail, it would be this one. Each K and each I and each comma has to be carefully typed so as not to put pressure on my boo-boo. This makes typing frustrating and slow. Fortunately, I only have a day and a half at a keyboard this week! However, if I had to pick between having a papercut under my fingernail and not having a papercut under my fingernail... I would be typing like wildfire!...
'I'm floating in a most peculiar way/ And the stars look very different today'
posted by srah on November 10, 2005 7:10 PM
I spent my late morning and afternoon stuffy and headachey then floaty and shivery then completely exhausted and teary followed by jitters. The sinus headache I'd had in the late morning drove me to buy some daytime sinus medicine that took me on a rollicking journey of interesting symptoms. I'm still not sure how much of it was the medicine and how much of it was me coming down with something, as I've just awoken, warm and toasty and swaddled in flannel and sweatshirt, from a two-hour nap. Time to put some chicken noodle soup and tea in me, sort...
Sort of stream of consciousnessey
posted by srah on November 1, 2005 9:35 PM
Tags: health, nanowrimo, nanowrimo 2005, weight, writing
I meant to weigh myself before I moved out, so that I could determine whether living on my own would make me fat or make me waste away to even less than I already was. But I didn't. Wow. What a great story. Good thing I'm writing a novel this month, what with all my storytelling skills. Alright, folks, I'm at 813 words and I'm going to bed. There's a drunken clown baking cookies and a very very boring stupid main character and I don't know if it's a murder mystery or a romance or an adventure novel because I...
To whom it may concern:
posted by srah on October 21, 2005 9:30 PM
I do NOT want bird flu. Thank you....
May cause excitability
posted by srah on September 19, 2005 10:57 PM
Note to self: Do not take 12-hour non-drowsy medications at noon. Especially the day before you have to be ready for interviewing at 8am. *unsleeps*...
If I'm successful, I may be completely liquid by the end of the day!
posted by srah on September 14, 2005 11:58 AM
For someone with such a wealth of free time, I sure don't use it well. I don' t think I've applied for half as many jobs as Mr B******, who is much busier than I am, and it's not as though I'm bogged down writing my first novel (that's November, hopefully). Instead I just sleep and sit around and read blogs all day. Today I'm trying to be productive. I'm also trying to address another issue that I have: drinking more water. I don't think I drink nearly enough water during the day - it's not something that comes to...
Hannibal the Hornet lies in wait
posted by srah on May 18, 2005 11:10 AM
Tags: bees, fear, health, hypochondria, readers' choice
I have just discovered that I am deathly afraid of bees! Oh boy, another phobia/neurosis to add to the list! There is a member of the bee family in my office. I always lump anything together that is black and yellow and has a stinger attached to it as a "bee" but I think this one may be a hornet. I am basing this on the fact that when it stopped flying around and I got a look at it, it looked exactly like this*, only slightly less cartoonish. I've never been stung by a "bee" and my hypochondria and...
Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiickly
posted by srah on March 25, 2005 1:40 PM
I drank 25 ounces of water in an hour this morning and then blew it all right back out my nose. My body now exists for the sole purpose of generating snot. My evil sinus overlords have allowed me the use of my fingers and part of my brain in order to notify you all that THIS BODY IS NOW UNDER THEIR CONTROL and that once they have used up all of the resources here, they will jump out of their current host and scurry up your leg and glom onto your face like something out of some movie -...
Mystery Sinus Theatre 2005
posted by srah on March 23, 2005 3:38 PM
One of my most popular posts is the one from about a year ago, wondering about the smell after you sneeze. People are always commenting and emailing me to say that they've smelled it too and to ask if I found the source. Now, after having seen informative videos on how your sinuses work, I'm wondering if what I'm smelling is a buildup of trapped mucus in my sinuses. This still doesn't explain why I only smell it when I sneeze rather than the whole time I'm sick. The mystery continues......
That's no cold... it's a space station
posted by srah on March 21, 2005 4:12 PM
Tags: health
Or a death plague of some sort. Kill me now. Must sleep till Thursday....
Poetry corner
posted by srah on March 21, 2005 3:01 AM
Tags: food, haiku, health, medicine, poetry
Ode to my dinner tonight Oh muttar paneer You are made with peas and cheese I have leftovers. Ode to a conversation we had over dinner about Mongolian delicacies I like peas and cheese. I like the two together. I like both of them. I like butter, tea. I like them separate, but Not butter in tea! Ode to yuckiness in a bottle I've just taken some Robitussin to fight off A cold I'm getting. It tastes rather crap. Medicine men, please work hard To make it tasty. It has maken me Jittery - and nauseous too Not really sleepy....
*hobbles*
posted by srah on February 16, 2005 9:59 AM
I was standing in line at Subway yesterday and when I turned to leave, there was an excruciating pain in my left big toe. All I can think is that I've sprained it or pulled a muscle or that I have some kind of Toe Carpal Tunnel Syndrome from using my toes to push in the clutch while driving. It only hurts when I flex it or when I shift my weight while turning. You might not notice until something like this happens, but you use your toes a lot when you turn! I IMed Alfie and she said she'd...
Coming down with something... possibly... celebrity?
posted by srah on January 28, 2005 8:06 PM
Tags: health, napoleon dynamite
The dog started whining to be let out. I sighed audibly to let him know how annoyed I was that he can't use the toilet like a normal person. I lumbered to a standing position and slumped towards the door, my head cocked to one side and my eyes barely open. I feel, I realized, like Napoleon Dynamite looks. When this happens, it is probably best to go directly to bed....
Earl Grey, why hath thou forsaken me?
posted by srah on January 26, 2005 4:51 PM
Tags: business school, headache, health, tea
My head hurts. I've just realized that I can't remember drinking any tea since Sunday. I remember boiling the water several times, but I never got to the stage of making or drinking the tea. So this headache may be from withdrawal. I am treating it now. Because of my headache, I have skipped out on a presentation I was going to go to at the Business School. So I put on my Business Casual Grown Up costume for nothing. Bah! Well, I'll have fun looking like a Business Casual Grown Up Laying Around The House And Moaning About Her...
Wasting away again...
posted by srah on January 7, 2005 12:43 PM
Tags: health
I am so conditioned to respond "fine" when someone asks me how I am, that I do so even when I'm not fine. I could be vomiting slugs and someone would ask me how I was and I would say "fiBLEAAAAAAAAAAAAGHne." I am not fine today....
Why won't this damn work do itself???
posted by srah on October 22, 2004 10:22 AM
Am sick. Am dying. Have so much work to do, so many visiting Englishmen to entertain, so much sleep to get, so much-- *THUNK* I appear to have passed out on the desk. Someone do my work for me while I recover?...
'Did you get everything you wanted out of this internship?' *SNORT!*
posted by srah on October 20, 2004 11:04 AM
Lack of sleep does strange things to you. It can make you suddenly decide that you HAVE TO UPGRADE MOVABLE TYPE at 8am. It can make you upgrade Movable Type when you're also supposed to be gluing things to your poster. It can make you late for work because you were sticking things to posters and panicking about missing comments when you should have already been at work. It can make you forget to put on deodorant. It can make you go to the bookstore for an emergency deodorant purchase and end up buying chapstick and a vile weird-ass energy...
Neck, glorious neck
posted by srah on March 5, 2004 6:35 PM
Assuming that my shoulders are each 90° from my normal point of vision, I can turn my head about 89° to the left right now and around 50° to the right. Attempts by Mr B------ to massage my neck have been met with whimpers and death threats. I think I slept on it funny. It amuses me because you don't realize how much you use your neck until it is unbearably painful to do so. At least my waist is getting a nice workout from doing all of the turning work. Unfortunately, I look like a total dweeb turning my...
Bless me!
posted by srah on February 26, 2004 11:40 AM
Tags: health, my favorite posts, sneezing
What is that weird smell after you sneeze? Is it stale air that's been stored in your sinus cavities? Is that the smell of snot? Is it just me?...
Ode to the flu (or whatever this is)
posted by srah on February 16, 2004 8:24 AM
Poor little Sarah Have a cup of tea. Wet heaves instead of dry ones. Before: curl up with a good movie. In grad school: curl up with text books. It seems I do have stomach muscles. I know 'cause I feel them spasming....
The gag reflex leaves me answered with a question mark
posted by srah on January 17, 2004 11:32 AM
Tags: health, medicine, mr b, vitamins
"I'm soooooo tiiiiiiiiired," I whined. "You're always tired. Maybe you should take some vitamins or something," suggested Mr B------. No! I don't take vitamins! Vitamins are for people who don't get adequate nutrition from their daily diets. Whereas I eat a very rounded diet of... lentil soup, Junior Mints and bubble tea. Oops. Huh. When did that happen? And more importantly, how have I survived this long? So when I went to the store last night, I stood in front of the multivitamin shelves, bewildered. Where are all of the Flintstones Women's Vitamins? Why don't they have chewable vitamins for...
AKA Sleeper
posted by srah on January 11, 2004 1:47 AM
How does Nyquil® work? How does it fix both stuffy and runny noses? Is there an ideal consistency for mucous that it regulates you out to? How does it know what my ideal consistency is? Why does it have to taste so bad? I bet it would be better for me if it tasted good, because I would rinse out the little cup and drink the rinsings, the way I do with Triaminic®, and sort of like that horrible commercial with the woman who drinks salsa-water. Water is good for you! Why does the bottle tell me to take 2...
Woe is srah
posted by srah on January 10, 2004 10:18 PM
Tags: health
*sniffle* *SNORT!* *sigh* *sniffle* *gack hack hack hack* *moan* *sniffle* *SNORT!* *blow nose* *sniffle* That is all. As you were....
Real* Stories of the Doctor's Office
posted by srah on January 5, 2004 2:22 PM
Tags: contact lenses, doctor, eyes, health
I finally went to the doctor to have my malady checked out. I expressed my concerns to the nurse that it could be an infection or pinkeye or a scratch on my eye or Mad Cow Disease or encephalitis or zombiism. She took a look at the inside of my eyelid and decided that irrigation was in order. When I hear irrigation, I think about things like redirecting the Nile in order to water crops. This is clearly the same image that she had, as she seems to have redirected the Nile into my eye. She threw me down on...
Ye'll walk the plank, Scott Baio!!!1
posted by srah on January 3, 2004 11:31 PM
Tags: contact lenses, eyes, health
My eye itches. It feels like there's a foreign object in there, but there are none to be found. I'm hoping that it's just irritated from me fiddling around while looking for an eyelash earlier, and that after a good night's sleep, everything will be fine in the morning. Let's all hold hands and think positive thoughts, shall we? But before we do any handholding, perhaps I ought to wash my hands first, just in case it is, as my hypochondriac self is wont to believe, pinkeye. I am hoping it's something that will necessitate an eyepatch. I would buy...
srah's tale of Christmastime woe
posted by srah on December 26, 2003 12:43 PM
Tags: christmas, health, holidays, srahfam
I have moved this post to the extension because, seriously? Who posted this? I am warning you right now that it's a vast puddle of Too Much Information......
Christmas dinner, revisited
posted by srah on December 25, 2003 11:18 PM
Tags: health
"I have spent so much time shopping, wrapping and cleaning that I haven't had more than a cup of soup in over 24 hours. I was at the point where I was so hungry it made me nauseous to think of food." Yeah, srah? That wasn't starvation; that was the flu. Bleaaaaaaargh. You are all invited to my funeral....
My ADDled mind
posted by srah on December 6, 2003 4:15 PM
Tags: health, hypochondria
I joked about having paper-writing ADD the other day, but it's got me thinking: What if I do have Attention Deficit Disorder? Why am I thinking this? Is it because Katie was recently diagnosed so I want to have it too? Is it because I'm a terrible hypochondriac and always decide that I have every disease I read about? Is it because it sounds like such a trendy disorder to have? Is it because I want an excuse for being scatter-brained? Is it just because I'm mentally exhausted right now and I'll be fine once I can catch up on...
Tales from srah's bladder
posted by srah on October 24, 2003 2:27 PM
Warning: this post should not be read by... anyone....
Don't poke me
posted by srah on October 24, 2003 8:15 AM
I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon and for the test they want to do, I have to have to drink 32 oz. of water through the course of the morning and show up with a full bladder. The stupid thing is that the test has nothing to do with my bladder. But anyway, I'm shooting for drinking a bottle of water an hour, starting at 8 and finishing by 12. Just don't make me laugh....
The glowest eye
posted by srah on September 9, 2003 6:03 PM
Tags: contact lenses, eyes, health
WARNING: Not for anyone who didn't like that one part in the pirate movie. On Friday I was putting my contacts in and my eye felt funny. So I went to take the left one out and only half of it came out. I dug around and dug around, trying to find the other half, then decided that it had probably fallen out in my digging and I hadn't noticed it. Because I wear disposable contacts, they're always getting lost in the putting-in/taking-out processes - falling onto the floor, sticking to my clothes, falling into the sink - and I...
Doctor my eyes
posted by srah on August 14, 2003 1:34 PM
Tags: health, ophthalmologist
I went to the ophthalmologist today. I swear it's true. If anyone tries to tell you lies about why my pupils are the size of my entire head, don't believe them. It's really because I went to the eye doctor. My eyes are starting to readjust now, but the computer screen still looks like a crazy kaleidoscope of moving colors. Also, there are furry pink lobsters crawling all over my skin and the disembodied head of Martha Stewart keeps singing Gregorian chants to me and periodically bursting into flames. Come to think of it, what's in those eye drops?...
Conversation in my mind
posted by srah on August 11, 2003 11:38 PM
Tags: conversation, health, hypochondria, imagination, readers' choice
Little Srah: Cough cough cough hack HACK HACK! Moooan... The Governor: (raps cane on the floor) Come now. See here, girl. What's that I hear? Another Miscellaneous Character: Oi finks it's the croup, guv'nor. Li'l srah won't be wif us come Christmas, oi dare say. The Governor: Oh well. (peers disdainfully through pince nez) She was always too small and weakly to be of any good to us in the poorhouse, and too young to be selling herself on the streets. Best she goes now, really. One less mouth to feed. In other words, I think I'm coming down with...
Ye'll walk the plank, ye scurvy dogs!
posted by srah on July 29, 2003 12:07 PM
Tags: health, job search, movies, pirates of the caribbean, pirates of the caribbean: the curse of the black pearl
To celebrate Becky's birthday, we went to see Pirates of the Caribbean again. Watching all of the credits like a true member of my family, I found my calling: pirate dialect coach. Not a dialect coach for pirates in movies, of course, nor dialect coach for the Pittsburgh Pirates. I'll sail the seven seas, teaching novice pirates to sound more authentic. In other news, I decided I was tired because I was dehydrated, so I've been drinking vast (avast!) amounts of water today. It hasn't helped so far, so I've decided that since I can't remember the last time I...
It might be fun to have claws
posted by srah on June 13, 2003 5:08 PM
Tags: health
I'm dying. I think my arms are going to fall off, or just shrivel up into little claws. I am convinced, as I am every summer, that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. I probably just slept on my arms or something....
Feed a cold, feed allergies
posted by srah on May 27, 2003 10:49 AM
It could be a cold. It is a possibility. But I think my eyes are a bit too itchy for a cold. Anyway, at this point, I would kill for a Cantal-and-butter baguette sandwich. But why must it come to that? Feed me, and save humanity....
*Sniffle*
posted by srah on May 27, 2003 8:40 AM
I am allergic to spending weekends with my family. I am allergic to the evil dog. I am allergic to my boyfriend going to Lake Michigan while I go to cemetaries. I am allergic to Movable Type. I am allergic to tissues. I am allergic to myself. I am allergic to you. I am full of theories. And snot....
Sarah Sarah über alles
posted by srah on April 10, 2003 5:37 AM
Tags: assistantship, health
I have declared myself la reine des mouchoirs, due to my constant sniffling and nose-blowing. I have invited Andrés to be le roi, as he is the latest victim of the Vichy Death Plague and we sniffled and suffered together all weekend, surely infecting everyone else. I also declared myself Emperor of Germany, but that's just because I'm insane....
Well? Who needs to get well?
posted by srah on April 8, 2003 4:09 AM
Tags: assistantship, health
I am off to Aurillac again this evening, to spend some bonding time with my fellow assistants before we are cruelly torn apart by the Fates. Hopefully I will come up with something to do in class on Thursday while I am there. Hopefully I will get some sleep and my cold will get better - or at least not any worse. Hopefully my little friends will all sign my cahier de souvenirs and we will dance and joyously sing. Or something. Goodbye and I'll blog to you on Thursday....
More drug-crazed ramblings
posted by srah on April 5, 2003 7:21 AM
Tags: assistantship, boys, health, medicine
At least I realize they're drug-crazed ramblings. That's something, at least. In between sending telegrams to The Front (textos to Renata), my other personality, the Major-General, has come up with the observation that girls are like cats and boys are like dogs. Or maybe it was me who came up with that. It's so crowded in there, it's hard to tell. Anyway, between the two (or seventeen, or however many there are) of us, we have managed to forget the evidence to support our claim, except that boys are often less complicated and more eager and drool a lot more....
What ho!
posted by srah on April 5, 2003 7:01 AM
Tags: assistantship, health, medicine
I don't believe in silverware. Especially when I'm sick. It's soup bowls to mouths for the duration, laddies! Has anyone else noticed that these drugs seem to have turned me into a British officer from a WWII movie? I better not run into Stefan or Johanna until I've recovered, or I might feel obliged to "stick it to the Jerries." Whatever that means. Toodle-oo, chaps!...
Lunchtime... or the munchies?
posted by srah on April 5, 2003 6:39 AM
Tags: assistantship, health, medicine
I sink I am a widdle dwugged out by the Fervex. It may be, however, that I want to be drugged out and am making myself think that I am. Intewesting....
A la pharmacie
posted by srah on April 5, 2003 6:20 AM
Tags: assistantship, france, health, medicine
I don't know what it's like at a pharmacy/chemist's in England or Sweden or Jamaica or Australia or wherever else you're reading from, but American pharmacies tend to be quite discreet. If you have diarrhea, you skulk over to the diarrhea section, snatch something off the shelf, based on your own specific symptoms and needs, edge over to the cashier, pay, and run away. With prescription medicines, you hand your paper to the man behind the counter, he gives you an unidentifiable bottle, you pay for your Viagra, and leave. In France, however (and in Chile as well), to get...
Much improved
posted by srah on April 4, 2003 6:59 AM
Tags: health
I'm feeling better now. I now have some semblance of a will to live. I still have a sore throat, cough, and stuffed-up ears, but I don't feel like fainting or throwing up, and I'm not alternating chills and overheating. My headache is gone and the sensitivity of my arm and leg hairs has returned to normal (zero, unless you're pulling on them). Also, the sun is shining. This may have made a difference. It's harder to want to continue living when you're living in grey, windy nastiness....
's only a flesh wound
posted by srah on April 3, 2003 1:55 PM
Tags: assistantship, health, teaching
I am very disappointed in myself for leaving work today. I left Véronique a note and took off because I was not getting any better and all I would do was stare blankly into space, trying not to fall over. I don't know if it's the Protestant Work Ethic or what, but I was disappointed in myself for not being able to work through it. This is the first time I've left work for health reasons - I even came in earlier in the year when I was shivery and nauseous and faint. I don't like to let anyone down,...
Don't leave the hypochondriac alone with her imagination
posted by srah on April 3, 2003 1:47 PM
Tags: health
A peculiar symptom of the plague or whatever it is I have is very sensitive arm and leg hairs. I am most likely insane. Can I take my pants off yet? Mommy has very kindly put ideas of SARS into my head, so now I have malaria, consumption, plague, and SARS. Lucky girl....
I am dying
posted by srah on April 3, 2003 5:23 AM
Tags: health
Don't get too attached to me. I am convinced I have ague. Or consumption. Or just hypothermia, because they seem to think that because there are no students, they don't need to heat the building. I am wearing my coat and scarf, but no one else seems to be as cold as I am. Unhealthy. Mommmmmyyyyyy......
Beautiful sentiment
posted by srah on April 3, 2003 2:17 AM
Tags: assistantship, friends, health
Excerpted from a texto from Andrês received today: thanks for existing Srah I think that's one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me. It's very nice to be thanked, not for anything you consciously did, but just for existing. Now I feel all warm and fuzzy. And shivery and phlegmy, but that's my cold....
Bleargh
posted by srah on April 3, 2003 1:32 AM
Tags: health
I'm sick and I don't know if I'm going to be able to last the whole day. You don't want details, but it involves choking on a lot of snot....
Wasting away to nothing
posted by srah on January 27, 2003 6:39 AM
Tags: assistantship, food, health
Would you hate me if I told you that one of my big problems at the moment seems to be that I've lost weight? I don't remember this happening in Grenoble, but these days my pants seem to hang a bit lower, which means I have to cuff them, then I keep stepping on the cuffs and I have to yank them up so as not to expose my underpants. Whereas other people try diet after diet, I have never had any desire to lose weight, and here I am with what butt I had rapidly disappearing. Thus I bring...
La Malade Imaginaire
posted by srah on December 19, 2002 10:20 AM
Tags: health
I decided when I woke up this morning that now, instead of food poisoning or the Vichy Death Plague, I had either pleuresy or pneumonia. But I feel better now, thankyouverymuch....
During a brief respite from the vomit...
posted by srah on December 17, 2002 2:00 PM
Tags: assistantship, health
Am self-diagnosed as having either food poisoning or the Vichy Death Plague. Am proud of myself for going to work this morning, despite feeling weak, exhausted, hot, cold, and nauseous, but also think myself rather insane. Am stuffing self with juice and crackers in effort to restore nutrients. Do not like being sick alone, but think that in some ways, it is better than being sick and needy....
I can't get no satisfaction
posted by srah on December 11, 2002 3:21 PM
Tags: assistantship, bureaucracy, harry potter, harry potter and the chamber of secrets, health, movies, stories
Today was a day of halves and not-quites. I had my visite medicale in Clermont-Ferrand, beginning with the lung x-ray at 2pm. I left Vichy at 12:00 because the next train was at 1:07 and wouldn't get me to Clermont until 1:40. I was concerned that I would not have enough time to find the office if I arrived with twenty minutes to spare. So I arrived at 12:40 instead, looked at my convocation to see the address of the radiography center, and discovered that my appointment was at 2:30, so I was wandering around Clermont for two hours for...
Enrhumée
posted by srah on December 6, 2002 12:57 PM
Tags: assistantship, health
Went up to school this afternoon for my weekly Spanish class, only to find that my classmates were having their conseil de classe and their class was cancelled. Walked home in the cold and believe I caught one. Chicken noodle soup and tea for dinner ce soir, then an early bedtime. We can fight this, as we have nothing better to do....
Reasons teachers miss school: la crève and la grève
posted by srah on October 13, 2002 10:38 AM
Tags: assistantship, health
I've decided I'm coming down with something and I fear it may be la crève, which has been going around school all week. So I will just hole up and nap and have hot tea and clementines all day so I can be healthy for my first day of Real Classes....
Dribble
posted by srah on September 5, 2002 4:21 PM
I drooled all over myself at the dentist's office again today, when I went in to have cavities filled. Now I'm trying not to dribble soup all over myself. There was something seriously wrong with our computer records. First, our last name was the only-slightly different yet completely unpronounceable "Nc Nitt". The address that the dentist's office had for our family was also a little out of date. Pretty interesting, actually, since I've lived in the same house all of my life. In fact, the address they had on record was at least TWENTY-FOUR YEARS out of date because it...
Drug dealer
posted by srah on September 3, 2002 4:15 PM
Tags: allergies, doctor, health
Last week, when I was sick, I made an appointment my mommy made me an appointment at the doctor's office. I couldn't get in until today, and I'm better today. But I figured I'd better go in anyway, just in case. Some background information: I hate my doctor's office. It's actually two offices, full of staff. I've never talked to the same staff member twice, and I'm convinced they don't keep any kind of records or charts on us, because I have to answer the same questions and fill out the same forms every time I'm there. They also screwed...
An apple a day...
posted by srah on September 3, 2002 1:21 PM
Tags: dentist, doctor, health, ophthalmologist
Today is my day of doctors' appointments. Oh joy. I started out the day at 8:50 with a trip to the dentist. I pulled up, went into the building, and got into the frighteningly bright yellow elevator. These are the times I wish I had a digital camera. I always feel like I'm going crazy in that elevator and today was no exception. I got in and was given a choice between two floors: 1 and LL. Since the dentist's office is upstairs, I decided that that would be 1. I pushed it and nothing happened. The doors didn't close,...
Snort!
posted by srah on August 29, 2002 8:20 AM
Tags: allergies, health, medicine
My dad doesn't have allergy problems. My mom has prescription medicine for it. So whose medicine did I end up taking last night? The dog's. The dog takes people-medicine, so it's not quite as strange as all that, but I feel funny taking medicine that was bought for the dog....
Achoo!
posted by srah on August 28, 2002 10:42 AM
Tags: health
I am snotty today, in more ways than my usual one. Ew. Like you needed to know that. Like my future self, wishing to know what I was like in 2002, needed to know that. Why am I still writing?...
It was nice blogging atcha
posted by srah on August 27, 2002 10:48 AM
I have suddenly come down with a case of allergies or something. It's probably West Nile Disease. Oh well. Bye....
Melodramatic srah
posted by srah on August 21, 2002 4:27 PM
Tags: health
I have drowned myself, attempting to drink from the drinking fountain. I had it set to the right height, then when I leaned, my hand leaned with me and turned it up. I can feel the water seeping around my respiratory system. I don't expect myself to live much longer. Goodbye, cruel world....
"I'm not dead yet! I don't want to go on the cart!"
posted by srah on July 31, 2002 11:58 AM
I had a doctor's appointment and some blood tests the week before last. When I was ready to leave, the receptionist told me that they would call me within five days and if they didn't call me, I should call them. What kind of thing is that to say? It's a sure sign that they're not going to call. Don't do that. Don't tell me you're incompetent - leave me to figure it out on my own. So I finally called today. "Ann Arbor Necrology, please hold," I heard. What? Am I going to die?, I thought, have they recognized...
TEETH!
posted by srah on July 30, 2002 2:39 PM
I think I've been grinding my teeth. Not at night, that I know of, but during the day. I don't realize it until I stop, then I go "Darn it, I was doing it again." I went to look in the mirror and see if I could see any evidence of grinding-damage, but I don't know anything about teeth, so I couldn't tell. Maybe I'm just clenching my jaw. While I was looking, I counted my teeth. I have 24. How many teeth do you have?...
Disease and deprivation stalk our land like... two giant stalking things
posted by srah on July 24, 2002 11:54 AM
Tags: health
I think I have carpal tunnel syndrome. Or leprosy. Or termites. Am I, an hourly worker, entitled to Worker's Comp? What is Worker's Comp, anyway? Is it something I would want to have? My arm hurts! And while we're on the subject, "I doubt that there are few people in the United States who have never heard of carpal tunnel syndrome.". I love a good professionally-designed website, me....
Nerd injury
posted by srah on July 22, 2002 1:36 PM
Tags: health
My fingers and wrists are sore. I know it's probably because of the bad positioning of the keyboard at this computer, but I can't help but think it's because I'm back at work, typing all day long, after five weeks off. I'm OUT OF SHAPE. I think I pulled something....
Uneven=odd?
posted by srah on March 29, 2002 10:29 AM
Tags: health
The hem of my right jeans leg is just fine, but the hem of the left one is unraveling and turning to threads. Yesterday I kept stepping on it for some reason. I think my right leg must be longer than my left one. I think everyone probably has some difference between the two, but I've never noticed it before. Anyone else out there have any interesting physical asymmetry?...
Sneezy
posted by srah on March 28, 2002 11:55 AM
Tags: health
For about the past half an hour, I've had that feeling where you're about to sneeze but you don't. Owwwww. Bah. Thought you'd care....
Stars! Stars everywhere!
posted by srah on March 27, 2002 1:44 PM
Tags: health
You know the phrase "seeing stars"? Have you ever actually had that happen to you? It's happening to me right now and I'm not sure why. Maybe I sat down too fast. Maybe I have a brain tumor. Troubling....
Exercise? Wazzat?
posted by srah on March 24, 2002 2:04 PM
I really ought to do something active once in a while in some kind of effort to "get into shape". I know, I'm giggling too. It's not that I need it in terms of physical appearance, but I really ought to be able to brush my hair without breaking a sweat. I should take up *snort* jogging or something and take some time away from vegetating in front of the computer. No, I just want to get rid of my body altogether. I can't wait until they create bionic bodies. I want to put my brain in a machine and...
Just for the record
posted by srah on March 21, 2002 3:07 PM
Tags: health
If you want me to make plans for Friday May 23, 2070 at 3:24:50 PM, I'm sorry but I won't be able to make it. I'll be busy dying. Your average life span is: 90 years old. By modifying your Health, Lifestyle, Diet and Environment you can live to be: 101 years old. You were born on Tuesday, August 26, 1980. You have lived 7,877 days and have 24,900 days left to live. Lets make them count! You should die on Friday May 23, 2070 at 3:24:50 PM. [via The Storm Brewing]...
srah would like a massage for Valentine's Day
posted by srah on February 14, 2002 1:51 AM
Tags: health
Should I be concerned that I have a horrible shooting pain in my upper back whenever I try to take a deep breath? I'm going to bed and it's going to disappear by morning. It had better, or I'm kicking my back's ass....
Seeing Things
posted by srah on February 8, 2002 5:55 PM
Tags: birth control, contact lenses, glasses, health, vision
Today's post titles all begin with letters down at the bottom of the alphabet. I am such a nerd for noticing that. I'm wearing my contacts today for the second day in a row. Before yesterday, I hadn't worn them for over a month because one of the side-effects of Alesse is the very vague possible difficulty wearing contact lenses. What does difficulty mean? That they will roll back into your head and give you a blood clot in your brain? That your eyes will dry up and you won't be able to get them out? I was scared but...
Don't sit down
posted by srah on February 1, 2002 11:26 AM
Tags: health, london, underground
I got this as an email forward. I don't know if any of it is true, but it sounds nasty enough to be fact. During Autumn of 2000, a team of scientists at the Department of Forensics at University College London removed a row of passenger seats from a Central Line tube carriage for analysis into cleanliness. Despite London Underground's claim that the interior of their trains are cleaned on a regular basis, the scientists made some alarming discoveries. The analysis was broken down. This is what was found on the surface of the seats: 4 types of hair sample...
That's right!
posted by srah on January 26, 2002 12:06 AM
Tags: health
That's right! Krista reminds me that there is a terrible chicken pox epidemic spreading across campus. Or maybe three cases. When I went to the doctor earlier this month, I saw a sign about chicken pox vaccines, which really upset me. Why didn't I get a chicken pox vaccine? If I had to suffer through it, I think today's kiddies should have to, too. Spread the pain around. Heh heh....
I'm siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick...
posted by srah on January 12, 2002 7:12 PM
Tags: health
I'm siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick. But better now. Don't know if it's the medication, or what. Jillian is shaky and weak too, so maybe it's something contagious instead. Looking on the bright side. :)...
Alesse Day 3
posted by srah on January 9, 2002 4:19 PM
Tags: bi