135 entries from srah blah blah tagged with 'tv':

Tadpoles is a winner!

There was an Internet quiz going around several months (years?) ago that was supposed to tell you who was Your TV Boyfriend. I took the quiz and it told me My TV Boyfriend was Jim Halpert. I was less than enthused, especially because this was sometime in season 3, where Jim was kind of a jerk or season 4, where he was just boring. So it got me thinking about who would be My TV Boyfriend if I - rather than an Internet quiz - were doing the picking. I had, after all, just eliminated The Ultimate TV Boyfriend, so...

srah - Friday, 13 February 2009 - 5:07 PM
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So make the Bad Horse gleeful, or he'll make you his mare

I watched/listened to the delightful Neil Patrick Harris-starring musical superhero show Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (main link | iTunes) four times this morning between 6am and 9am. I think I may have a problem. I will probably just keep playing it over and over again in a background tab and use it as the soundtrack for my day all day today. This is only the third thing that I've seen Felicia Day in, but I am noticing patterns that can only be described... in Venn diagram form! I feel that there must be SOMETHING at the center of that diagram....

srah - Tuesday, 15 July 2008 - 12:25 PM
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Such a well-rounded individual with so many varied interests

It's summer and there's no TV to watch. (Except hey, did you know the cast of The Office is playing Celebrity Family Feud tonight against the cast of American Gladiators?) So in these sad days when Celebrity Family Feud is the most exciting thing on, let's revisit TV as once we knew it, because I am a boring person who has no other interests outside of TV and therefore I am unable to blog about anything else. These are my favorite episodes of some of my favorite shows: Favorite episode of 30 Rock (easy): Tracy Does Conan. ("Blue man! You’re...

srah - Tuesday, 8 July 2008 - 5:29 PM
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Do they have TV in intravenous form yet? Why not? Discuss.

Internet, I know you come here for the disgusting horrible metaphors, so let me give you one here: You know how in order to make delicious delicious pâté, the nasty mean delicious-delicious-pâté-makers hook the poor delicious delicious geese up to a big pipe and shoot feed down their throats, force-feeding them until their delicious delicious livers are all huge and swollen and distended?¹ That is going to be me tonight, only replace "throats" with "eyes" and replace "feed-pipe" with "television." ABC and NBC have decided to cooperate and arrange all of my favorite shows on one night, in a big...

srah - Thursday, 1 May 2008 - 12:46 PM

American Idol hears my cry!

Once again, furiously blogging furiously has paid off, several years late. Important Decision Makers Of The World obviously read my blog, but are waaaaaay backed up on their feed-readers. The DREAM OF MY LIFE is about to come true, you guys, and I notice that none of my little bloggy friends have seen fit to notify me. Fortunately I have other spies who could feed me the information that TEH NEIL IS GUEST-JUDGING ON AMERICAN IDOL NEXT WEEK. Years and years of begging and pleading (passively, in blog-form) for American Idol to institute a Neil Diamond Week, and it's finally...

srah - Wednesday, 23 April 2008 - 12:29 PM
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Signs that I am probably going to get murdered one of these days

my love for Garland Greene in Con Air my love for Norman Bates in Psycho my love for Benjamin Linus from Lost...

srah - Thursday, 13 March 2008 - 12:42 PM
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Barouches of Fire

I guess I should finally finish writing this post, before it's Sunday again and time for more Jane Austenpalooza (I've never seen a film adaptation of Northanger Abbey so I'm looking forward to that one, but I think I'm going to have to tape it). Things I liked about Persuasion (2007) It was produced by Clerkenwell Films. Rupert Penry-Jones is ridiculously handsome and smoldering. I felt like Mary Elliot Musgrove was a more complex character in this adaptation than in Persuasion 1995. In 1995, her hypochondriac tendencies seemed more like annoying attention-seeking personal traits, whereas in this version it was...

srah - Friday, 18 January 2008 - 12:29 PM
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I'm out of it for a little while, and everybody gets delusions of grandeur.

Fox was apparently surprised and dismayed to find that the viewership numbers for American Idol are down this year. Fox had assumed that the writers' strike would mean that more people would turn to reality television, but from everything I've seen and heard anecdotally, it sounds like more people are turning to Netflix and to Doing Other Stuff. I have turned to the Internet, to my local library's DVD/video collections and to Not Procrastinating. It might help if Fox's advertising approach were something other than "It's the only thing on!" I watched part of Tuesday's episode and decided that was...

srah - Thursday, 17 January 2008 - 5:09 PM
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One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other

This SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY, coming to a TV near me (and maybe you, if you're lucky!) is the three-month Jane Austenpalooza on Masterpiece Theatre. In case this is the first you're hearing of the loveliness that PBS is providing in our hour of television need, here's the program: January 13: PersuasionThe Amanda Root-Ciaran Hinds version is probably my favorite film version of a Jane Austen novel, so I'm a bit hesitant about this one. Can it be anywhere near as good? January 20: Northanger AbbeyI've never seen a film version of Northanger Abbey, but it's the novel that I've read...

srah - Thursday, 10 January 2008 - 9:53 PM
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Crimpity crimpity now now, crimpity crimpity ask me how

Dear American Idol, If it is not too late to suggest this (which it probably is, but you can use my ideas next year), I humbly suggest the following themes for the eleven "Top 12" weeks of American Idol: Queen Neil Diamond Musicals #1 song from the day you were born The Cure Wizard Rock Gilbert and Sullivan Famous commercial jingles Crimp Night srah's choice Live Crocodile Night (no singing involved)...

srah - Tuesday, 8 January 2008 - 12:00 AM
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I'm a nerd, okay? Leave me be.

So much for my Writers' Strike plans. Instead of the Quantumleapapalooza I predicted, all of my television needs have been fulfilled by outsourcing. Corner GasThis Canadian series is running on Superstation WGN at bizarre hours like 11:30pm on Sunday night and 8pm on Wednesday. This is why I have only seen two episodes of Pushing Daisies, folks. It is not that I dislike Pushing Daisies, but something about Pushing Daisies makes my heart ache a little bit, and Corner Gas just makes me laugh. Be gone with you, angst! Instead we shall drive around in little cars. Never Mind the...

srah - Tuesday, 18 December 2007 - 12:13 PM
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I'm just a girl who cain't say no

One really exciting thing about the writers' strike is that I will be freed from my enslavement to the TV. Once they run out of new episodes, I won't have to worry about what to watch and what to tape and what to watch or not watch online. I started to think, at first, that this would be a really exciting time for me, so that instead of this¹:   Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday 8 Shouty Man Shouting Into a Megaphone Shoutily (ABC) The Barney and Marshall Show, Also With Other Characters (CBS) A Very Special "Social...

srah - Saturday, 17 November 2007 - 4:14 PM
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What's it gonna take to stop the scabbers?

'Tis Thursday and I am therefore struck with the weekly conundrum: do I watch 30 Rock tonight and watch Ugly Betty online this weekend or do I watch Ugly Betty tonight and watch 30 Rock online this weekend? But now there is the added complication of the writers' strike. In the interest of supporting the writers, shouldn't I make a statement to the network by avoiding the online content for which they don't get paid? Geez, I think I'm actually going to have to find a blank tape and use my VCR like some kind of caveman. What have you...

srah - Thursday, 8 November 2007 - 7:31 PM
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The CIA is gonna need Dwight down at their headquarters in Langley for training and an ice cream social

In preparation for the season premiere of The Office, I went to the grocery to buy Office-appropriate foodstuffs. I settled on a container of ice cream, which is nice for four reasons: Mint chocolate chip is the best flavor of ice cream cake for the birthday of a lactose-intolerant person.One time, I said I was Bridget Jones and I talked like this for the whole conversation! "I like ice cream! I need a boyfriend!"It's green and I think green is kind of whoreish.Turkey Hill ice cream is apparently supposed to be "Philadelphia Style" (whatever that means), so it looks like...

srah - Thursday, 27 September 2007 - 8:00 PM
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Mystery Library Theatre 2007

I frequently get to play a game called "Now Why Did I Rent This Again?" This happens because I am too cheap frugal to get a Netflix account or go to my local video rental store, so I use the library for all of my video rental needs. The library system around here has a pretty awesome selection, which is nice, but they don't have many copies of anything. This means that I tend to request something in, say, June and I am put on the reserves list but it doesn't get to me until August, because everyone on the...

srah - Friday, 31 August 2007 - 7:55 PM
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Dr Teeth and the Electric Mayhem

On the subject of visits to medical professionals, I recently went to the dentist. I have seen a lot of my dentist in the last year or so, what with the fact that I kind of sort of put off going to the dentist for almost two years when I moved here. In the almost two years between cleanings, I developed cavities in all four quadrants of my mouth, so I've had four appointments for fillings in the last six months. And now cleaning time has rolled around again and she found a few more cavities to fill. I think...

srah - Wednesday, 1 August 2007 - 4:46 PM
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Blah blah blah Flight of the Conchords blah

(My titles are very creative lately.) I put a wig on you when you were sleeping... put a wig on you, ooh ooh ooh, and I just laid there and spooned you......

srah - Tuesday, 24 July 2007 - 11:15 PM
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A sign that you are not me

You hear the name "Felicity" and think of Keri Russell rather than Gema Zamprogna....

srah - Friday, 6 July 2007 - 12:51 PM
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Jason Segel has the CRAZY EYES

In all of my Apatow-fest viewings, I have taken a shining to two of his fetish-actors (Do we use that phrase in English? Where did I get that phrase from???). The first is Martin Starr, whose comic timing and delivery is HUGE and SPECTACULAR in a very understated way as Bill Haverchuck in Freaks and Geeks (but he's also very good at the sad, hurt parts as well). He also appears as Martin (the guy with the beard) in Knocked Up and as a visiting high school friend of Steven's in Undeclared. These clips are both from Freaks and Geeks:...

srah - Wednesday, 27 June 2007 - 12:52 PM
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I'm not a little girl, I'm a bionic woman.

I am having a Judd Apatow-fest of late. I recently checked Freaks and Geeks out of the library and watched it for the first time. Well, sort of. I watched the final episode back when it was on TV and went "Oh, this is pretty funny. But now it's cancelled. I guess I should have started watching earlier." Then the voices of thousands of Freaks and Geeks fans cried out and were suddenly silenced. I feel bad for them, because I felt the same way after Arrested Development was cancelled and people kept telling me they'd seen it on DVD...

srah - Wednesday, 27 June 2007 - 12:08 PM
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Legend- wait for it -ARY!

It's time for a game I like to call Haaaaaave You Met Ted? Conversations with an Imaginary Colocuter. I tend to prepare myself in my head for conversations that never happen. Today, the topic of conversation is the TV show that I illegally superlegally downloaded from the Internet to watch on my trip. Imaginary Colocuter: Say, what's that you're watching there? me: It's a TV show called How I Met Your Mother. It's really good! It's about this guy in the future telling his kids the story of how he met their mother. Except it's been going on for two...

srah - Wednesday, 13 June 2007 - 7:09 AM
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I love bug-eyed clay animals!

Creature Comforts is coming to America tonight at 8pm on CBS, further proving that CBS might as well go off the air from 8:30 on Monday to the following Monday at 8, because they only have good shows on during that one half-hour slot. [via ghetto of our mind]...

srah - Monday, 4 June 2007 - 6:29 PM
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So few demands on my time!

June 17 will be a very exciting day for me, where I will not have to choose between not watching Flight of the Conchords debut on the HBO that I don't have: and not watching Robot Chicken: Star Wars on the Comedy Central that I don't have. I leave the choice to you folks. I'm actually going to be out of the country, anyway....

srah - Monday, 4 June 2007 - 6:14 PM
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How do we know if she is a Cylon? ... Build a bridge out of her?

I finally finished watching Battlestar Galactica Season 2 (which is evilly packaged as Season 2.0 and Season 2.5 just in order to stretch out the time it takes me to reserve and receive the DVDs at the library). I have to say, I was not thrilled. I think Season 1 was a lot better. It's sort of like Harry Potter, where book 1 was great because it set up this new imaginary world for us to explore, then in book 2 we didn't have that exciting sense of exploration and novelty anymore. I'm hoping that Season 3, whenever I get...

srah - Monday, 4 June 2007 - 6:03 PM
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It's time to get Lost, yo!

If my sister can liveblog American Idol, I can do it for the Lost season finale! Also, this will keep me from falling asleep like usual....

srah - Wednesday, 23 May 2007 - 9:00 PM
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TV's grip on my soul is nearly at an end (for this season)

But what will I blog about when there's nothing on TV???? Anyway, the best part of The Office last night (thanks to OfficeQuotes.us, which already has the transcript up!):...

srah - Friday, 18 May 2007 - 11:30 AM
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Her art... was the prettiest art... of all the art

This blog would like to take a moment to announce, before tonight's season finale of The Office, that it supports Pammy Pam "Fancy New" Beesly (Miss Beesly if you're nasty) in all her future endeavours. This blog is firmly Team Pam, rather than Jam, so this blog would be totally cool with it if, say, Jim made a move in tonight's episode and Pam refused him. This blog would think that was awesome, because Fancy New Beesly has made a lot of progress and personal growth this season, what with her courage and honesty and fire-walking and tire-changing and art-showing...

srah - Thursday, 17 May 2007 - 12:50 PM
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When do we get a show about the Aflac duck?

Hey readers, I think you're totally awesome so here's a link to a preview of the best new show of the fall! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Made you click! Okay, that was mean. I hope you survived the badness. In fact, that looks like the worst new show of the fall. Part of me can't believe they would put something on TV that a) sounds like such a bad idea and b) isn't even executed well. Then I remember that TV executives are pretty much idiots. To make up for my tomfoolery and all the...

srah - Thursday, 17 May 2007 - 6:48 AM
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Made of real gorilla chest?

Blake is doomed. He is doomed and he is going to meet his doom in grubby pants and a tuxedo t-shirt. Blake Blake Blake. However, I'm almost prepared to forgive him this horrifying fashion blunder because of the Hard Day's Night-inspired video for their weekly stupid American Idol Ford commercial, wherein Blake wears a vest. Almost. Vests impress me a lot, but not quite enough to make up for a tuxedo t-shirt. (Oh look! Another video!)...

srah - Wednesday, 9 May 2007 - 9:31 PM
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This is no time for joking, Gigantic Turkey Sub!

I don't seem to be able to go a week without posting videos on here. It's a sickness. At least I'm mostly limiting myself to once-a-week rather than giving up altogether on posting original content. Saturday Night Live gets a lot of flak for not being funny anymore, but I'd be willing to wager that Saturday Night Live now is just as good as Saturday Night Live in the 70s or 80s. It's just more recent and fresh in people's minds. There were probably episodes of SNL that tanked back then and don't show up in reruns. There were lots...

srah - Wednesday, 9 May 2007 - 5:51 PM
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Who's your daddy?

This season of American Idol has been very disappointing. I probably say this every year, but this year it seems like I hate more people than I like. With any luck, Whiny Chris and Alien Phil will leave this week and we will be left with only talented people. Out of the other four (Blake, Lakisha, Jordin and Melinda) I don't really care who wins, because Blake is so much better than everyone else that he has already transcended American Idol and doesn't really need to win. It's not that he's a better singer than the other three (he's usually...

srah - Wednesday, 2 May 2007 - 12:23 PM
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Wednesday Night: Must Not See TV

Herein lie spoilers for American Idol and Lost. Advance at your own risk!...

srah - Thursday, 12 April 2007 - 12:56 PM
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It's Thursday and The Office is back after a looooong hiatus! O happy day! Let us rejoice! This evening we shall finally discover how Roy follows up on his vow to kill Jim Halpert. First, let's enjoy Jim as we once knew him... That last part makes me laugh out loud every time I see it, and sometimes when I just think about it, too. And now let's watch Dwight's courageous investigation of Jim's theoretical murder:...

srah - Thursday, 5 April 2007 - 12:48 PM
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Polar bears and blah blah blah

Dear ABC, You need to move Lost back to the 9:00 hour, because I fall asleep during the show almost every week. Kthxbye. I have no idea what happened after Kate tried to beat up Juliet, which - as I remember - happened quite early in last night's show. As the episode started, it occurred to me that I don't really like Kate. This is a problem I've been having with Lost lately. I'll find out it's a Locke-centric episode and say "Oh no. Not Locke. I don't like Locke." "Not Charlie. Ugh. I don't like him." "Jack? Jack is...

srah - Thursday, 5 April 2007 - 7:02 AM
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So nice they named it twice! The other name is Manhattan.

At the end of April, I will spend a weekend visiting one of our study abroad providers in Stamford, Connecticut. Yes, that Stamford, would-be home of Dunder-Mifflin Northeast and the next major town to Stoneybrook. Wow. I am so awesome. Why don't I have any friends around here, again? In addition to visiting super-dibble Stamford, there will also be a "social outing" to New York City. It will be so special I might even call it... Super Special! Then I will glue glitter and feathers on my Kid-Kit and-- wait, what was I talking about? New York intimidates me more...

srah - Thursday, 29 March 2007 - 7:15 PM
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Here are some words that rhyme with Sanjaya: pariah, papaya...

My answer to The Great Sanjaya Mystery (namely, "Why is he still on American Idol?") lies with Lisa Simpson. Lisa's favorite periodical is Non-Threatening Boys Magazine. And what could be less threatening to a naive, nervous prepubescent girl than a boy who will not show any interest in you at all? He is like a stepping stone for little girls: a boy who sort of looks like a girl and will never do anything gross like kiss them, but is sort of nice to look at. And he might let you braid his hair. I think this affinity for Non-Threatening...

srah - Tuesday, 27 March 2007 - 7:37 PM
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But what of Shy Violet?

Regarding this week's episode of Lost.......

srah - Thursday, 22 February 2007 - 1:04 PM
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Beware of Greeks bearing Wookiees

Lost spoiler (though it isn't much of a spoiler and won't ruin the whole episode for you if you read on):...

srah - Thursday, 8 February 2007 - 12:47 PM
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The innocent shall suffer... big time

Yesterday's All Things Considered stories seemed more amusing than usual, and the commentators even occasionally seemed snarky. I found myself laughing out loud several times, and it wasn't just caused by insanity this time. But the best story of all was about how yesterday's bomb scare turned out to be because of a marketing campaign for Aqua Teen Hunger Force. I suppose if there are any cartoon characters out there that I would suspect of being terrorists, it would probably be Marvin the Martian, and then the Mooninites¹. But that doesn't mean that if I saw Marvin the Martian or...

srah - Thursday, 1 February 2007 - 11:42 AM
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'Me lobe you, Long Tim'

These are my thoughts on TV this week, which were all too short and pointless to have their own posts, but which I feel are justifiable when you chuck them all together into one post. Caution: Spoilers ahoy for all y'all who Tivoed House, Beauty and the Geek or The Office....

srah - Friday, 12 January 2007 - 12:06 PM
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What's up, m'nerds?

Last night around 7:30, I checked the TVGuide.com listings to find out which channel the season premiere of Beauty and the Geek¹ was on. And I couldn't find it anywhere! That's okay, the TVGuide.com listings are sometimes weird and sometimes they are a day off and it takes some fiddling to get them to catch up. So I checked out Yahoo! TV, my back-up² source for TV listings when TVGuide is being a spaz. It wasn't on there either! I resigned myself to the fate of having to illegally super-legally download episodes from the Internet and started watching a DVD,...

srah - Thursday, 4 January 2007 - 6:01 PM
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Unsolicited romantic advice

I feel as though I have been plagued for weeks by Young Ladies Who Don't Know What's Best For Them, But I Do. The problem with these young ladies is that they are fictional, so it is hard for me to communicate with them. I can yell into my television and my computer screen all that I want, but they just don't seem to listen and don't seem to understand that they are making ALL THE WRONG CHOICES in their love triangles. Betty Suarez, you must choose Adorable Henry the Accountant over Horrible Walter the... Horrible Walter. Walter cheated on...

srah - Tuesday, 5 December 2006 - 7:54 PM
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The terrorists have won

Things that I am way more upset about than I probably rationally ought to be but they're so frustrating they make me want to gouge my other people's eyes out: Today's For Better or For Worse and the boring wimpy stupid whiny character of Anthony (but I'm not the only one)WLWT pre-empting the entire brand-new NBC Thursday-night lineup for a stupid BENGALS game...

srah - Tuesday, 28 November 2006 - 12:16 PM
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Put your tape decks on record, y'all

Ludacris hosted Saturday Night Live this weekend and surprised me by not taking himself seriously and actually being funny. This is not something I really expect from rappers, who seem way too concerned with getting other people to take them seriously. Now I think that Ludacris is awesome. Yay Ludacris. There were many funny parts to the episode, but one really stood out, in that it has been in my head CONSTANTLY FOR ABOUT 36 HOURS. Fortunately, NBC has put the whole Blizzard Man sketch online so that you too can enjoy these miraculous lyrics (and the dances that go...

srah - Monday, 20 November 2006 - 1:07 PM
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Hooray for ABC's free online replays!

Dear Ugly Betty, Walter traps you under a net and won't let you go until you say you'll miss him, even if you won't. Henry is dressed like Superman (or Superaccountant) under his clothes. I think the choice is clear. Don't be Stupid Betty!...

srah - Saturday, 28 October 2006 - 1:50 PM
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I'm... just looking

I wish people at work watched The Office, because all day today I wanted to demand a Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch!...

srah - Friday, 6 October 2006 - 10:00 PM
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Srahrles in Charge

If I were in charge of the world, there would be a TV station that played episodes of The Cosby Show twenty-three and a half hours a day. At midnight, there would be an episode of Saved by the Bell to ensure that I would eventually turn off the TV and go to bed....

srah - Monday, 2 October 2006 - 7:21 PM
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Hey, Big Tuna

My predictions for a new character, just barely introduced last night, are hidden below. I have spoiler-cut them for anyone who taped last night's episode and hasn't yet seen the part where Pam is having Creed's baby and then an alien pops out of her chest and eats Jim's face off (oops)....

srah - Friday, 22 September 2006 - 12:44 PM
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Ryan is... dead

Do you know what today is? It's The Office premiere day, that's what! If I had a Chili's in town, I would be there tonight, ordering an Awesome Blossom, Extra Awesome. Instead I will have to sit at home and cook bacon on my George Foreman grill. Wait, I don't have a George Foreman grill. So much for that plan. I guess it's the same old ham and cheese, then. And perhaps some GRAAAAAAAAAAAAPE soda. And now another of my favorite moments from one of my favorite episodes: (Michael, after cooking his foot, falls in the bathroom and no one...

srah - Thursday, 21 September 2006 - 12:03 PM
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On my local UPN station right now:

King of Cornhole 11:00am WBQC 2 A weekly singles tournament in Cincinnati....

srah - Saturday, 12 August 2006 - 11:10 AM
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My dreams last night were NBC-licious! I dreamt that I was at NBC's headquarters, where they were making decisions about next fall's lineup. I showed up in the office and told them my ultra-secret method for getting more people to watch NBC: start every single show with a sex scene. "That will really catch people's attention," I explained. Next I was at the place where they film Saturday Night Live and I found out that starting this season, they were going to take me out of the credits at the beginning where they introduce each cast member. I had been...

srah - Sunday, 23 July 2006 - 9:33 PM
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Srah's week in The Office

I am giving presentations every afternoon this week. Once that microphone is clipped onto my sweater, I turn into a character in a television documentary. Once I get up in front of people I have an urge to shout GOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING VIETNAM!, or possibly quote Benito Mussolini and bang on a podium for a while. Coincidentally, I also have a candy dish on my desk in order to lure young persons in my direction. All I need is a beet farm and a poster of freaky saxophone-babies and I will be complete!...

srah - Tuesday, 27 June 2006 - 8:00 PM
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They must be saving TEH NEIL!!!!1 for later

Acceptable song choices for next week's Elvis-themed American Idol: Always On My MindKentucky RainSuspicious Minds Unacceptable song choices for next week's Elvis-themed American Idol: Everything else Overplayed song that I am almost positive will be sung by someone next week: A Little Less Conversation Horrifying spectre that dost float in my mind's eye when picturing next week's episode: Taylor Hicks gyrating and announcing that he is "itching like a man on a fuzzy tree"Taylor Hicks gyrating and announcing that he is "a hunk o' hunk o' burnin' love" My overall reaction to the thought of next week's episode: Nausea...

srah - Thursday, 4 May 2006 - 5:53 PM
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American Idol never listens to my genius suggestions!

Because I am sick and should be sleeping, instead I have discovered all of the #1 songs on the dates of birth of the remaining American Idol contestants. Tonight's theme is "Music from the year you were born," I am told, so I thought I would use the ol' This Day in Music machine to pick songs for the would-be Idols: Paris Bennett (September 23, 1988) - "Don't Worry, Be Happy" by Bobby McFerrin Katharine McPhee (March 25, 1984) - "Footloose" by Kenny Loggins Chris Daughtry (December 26, 1979) - "Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" by Rupert Holmes Elliott Yamin...

srah - Tuesday, 2 May 2006 - 6:48 PM
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I dreamt last night that my sister and I were in the top 12 on American Idol. They had flown the top 12 to the Globe Theatre in London for a Very Special Top 12 Episode or something. We were all sitting around in the audience seats (which doesn't make any sense because the Globe doesn't have theatre seating) and waiting for things to get started. Sway and Gedeon were there too, but I don't remember seeing Taylor anywhere. We had to organize ourselves into pairs or groups of three (I don't think this was for singing purposes, as the...

srah - Wednesday, 26 April 2006 - 6:25 AM
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U Can't Watch This

Stop! Cable Time! HBO and Playboy, Showtime and MTV I might like 'em more after my lobotomy Now why did I ever pay for this junk? I hooked up eighty channels and each one stunk Just brainless blood and guts, and mindless T & A It's awful, it's putrid, it's crummy, it's stupid, gonna throw my set away - "Weird Al" Yankovic, "I Can't Watch This" Ah, there's a Weird Al song for every situation, isn't there? How poetic. Or something. I am lame. Someone stupidly scheduled TV Turnoff Week for this week, when there are new episodes of American...

srah - Tuesday, 25 April 2006 - 5:14 PM
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I had a dream that I was on a bus tour, maybe in Israel again, and Simon Cowell and the Queen of England were on the tour with me. Simon kept bitching about how much he hated Ryan Seacrest and was trying to tell America that he was gay in order to ruin his life, and how it was top secret and I couldn't tell anyone, but he was going to leave the show next year. Since it was a dream, I think it's okay that I've been telling everyone I know....

srah - Sunday, 16 April 2006 - 10:10 PM
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American Idol: Poetry in Motion

Dammit! They sent Schmeedle home? I checked in partway through the show and saw that it was going to be either him or Bucky, so I thought I had it in the bag. Looks like I'll be able to reuse my haiku next week: Howling and off-key The reign of Bucky must end My ears are bleeding...

srah - Thursday, 23 March 2006 - 6:48 AM
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D.H.A.R.M.A. may cause dry mouth, hair loss, an overly alert feeling, and in some cases may diminish your sex drive.

Spoilerfix.com has a few pretty stupid notes on next week's Lost. But one of them intrigues me... (rather vague and strange spoiler after the jump)...

srah - Thursday, 23 February 2006 - 10:35 PM
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This week's theme: Everybody likes little boys

Uh... American Idol. As a group, the girls are more talented than the guys, but they also have less personality and are less interesting. I know that you are all clamoring for my thoughts on this evening's episode, so I will just cut and paste an email that I sent to my AI-watching friends this evening, because I am lazy. Suck it!...

srah - Wednesday, 22 February 2006 - 9:51 PM
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Sarah's television recaps/predictions/woes in one handy package

There may be spoilers mixed in here, so if you have not yet watched all the shows you ought to, then you'd better cover your eyes as you scroll down the page and have a trusted friend tell you when to open them. This is the extent of my non-spoiling efforts. So there. FIRST OF ALL, please have it be known that I saw The Last Temptation of Homer on TV Tuesday night and later read this thread on Fark and as a result, the name "Joey Jo-Jo Junior Shabadoo" has been echoing in my brain for hours now. Whenever...

srah - Thursday, 9 February 2006 - 12:03 PM
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Set a course for adventures... in doctoring!

During the credits for House, the background picture changes for every cast member's name. Every time I watch the credits, I wonder if they mean something. I'm probably looking too deep into this, but I have the same thought every time I see them. Let's review: House: Picture of a brain. He's the brains of the operation Cuddy: Blood vessels. She's the... life blood or something. Foreman: Lungs. He, uh, breathes new life into the team. Wilson: Another brain. He's... um, another brain. Cameron: Boats. Oooooh, BOATS!!! Look at the pitty boats! Chase: Spine. Because... he has a spine or...

srah - Friday, 16 December 2005 - 10:14 PM
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Sarah's latest wacky Lost theory

Who would have an interest in forming their own band and remaining hidden from other people? Who would grab a bunch of kids and have no interest in taking adults? PETER PAN, THAT'S WHO. The Lostaways have crash-landed in Never Never Land, but a horrifying Never Never Land with a ruthless, murdering Peter Pan. Walt is now a Lost Boy. Just you wait! I'll turn out to be right, I know it! I just haven't figured out where the polar bear fits in yet. Update: Polar bears. A fondness for children. A list of Who's Naughty and Nice. IT'S SANTA...

srah - Thursday, 17 November 2005 - 7:33 PM
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Hail to the cranky victors!

Revealed this evening on House, M.D.: House went to the University of Michigan. The other thing that we have in common is our extraordinary good looks!...

srah - Tuesday, 27 September 2005 - 9:22 PM
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He felt the need... for speed?

I've heard quite a bit lately about Tom Cruise's appearance on Oprah earlier this week. Most of the comments have been about Tom jumping on the furniture and basically looking like he was on drugs, but for me the most disturbing point was when he said, "What I love most about Katie is her gen--" There was an awkward pause between the first syllable of the word and those that followed and it allowed my brain to fill it in with the first thing that came to mind. That's sick, Tom. I know you're trying to show America that you...

srah - Thursday, 26 May 2005 - 5:36 PM
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Or care!

It's 9:22 am and I still don't know who my American Idol is!!!!!1 Update: Bleaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhh......

srah - Thursday, 26 May 2005 - 9:22 AM
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One man's crushing blow to Cleveland's tourism industry

"If you go to Cleveland, you'd probably see a million of me walking around." - Scott Savol, American Idol I have a new least favorite mental image. I may have nightmares tonight. (P.S. Constantine, we are not having fun yet. Nor were we at any point during that song you sang.)...

srah - Tuesday, 26 April 2005 - 8:57 PM
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Note to archivists: HCI pwned j00!

Tuesday is my big day for watching TV, by which I mean I actually watch TV. The only times I do this with anything approaching regularity are Sunday night's Adult Swim lineup and Tuesday (basically 7-10 because... hell, it's already on...). Usually before our big American Idol get-together, we turn on the TV for Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy!. Last night, one of the contestants on Wheel of Fortune introduced herself as an "interface architect." Pat Sajak was obviously confused by this job title but she said something along the lines of, "You know interfaces? I architect them." Hooray for...

srah - Wednesday, 20 April 2005 - 1:28 PM
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Reference few will understand:

This post and Doctor Orpheus and the pain in my toe keep making me think, 'I'm sorry, but this toe will have to be AMPUTATED FROM THE MATERIAL SPHERE!!!!!!'...

srah - Wednesday, 16 February 2005 - 2:57 PM
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Teen Best Friends Week! "My name is Justin and I play hockey for my local high school and I ROCK! HARD CORE! This is my friend Nate. He plays bass and he ROCKS! HARD CORE!" "We're Tessa and Megan! We're cheerleaders!" *hug* "Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeam!" I want to solve the freaking puzzles - I could do without Pat Sajak and the moronic contestants. Does this show want to kill me? Is it my imagination or does each show get more painful than the one before it? Why am I still watching? I'm watching so you don't have to, folks. It's Teen Best...

srah - Wednesday, 2 February 2005 - 7:01 PM
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Thoughts on American Idol

Can you sing? Do you know someone who can sing? I can't think of anyone I know who can sing well enough that I would encourage them to try out for American Idol on national television. Why do these people's friends and family allow them to do this? Why do all of the contestants say, "Everyone I know says I sing really well?" Does everyone they know hate them? Being rejected is like a double-whammy: You suck, and everyone you know has just set you up to make a fool of yourself....

srah - Thursday, 27 January 2005 - 10:49 PM
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Bob is a TV star! Watch!...

srah - Thursday, 20 January 2005 - 9:15 PM
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Whatever happened to John Stevens, anyway?

Less than a week to the premiere of American Idol! You know what that means? Yes, that's right: Weeks and weeks of stupid pointless posts from me. There's gonna be some changes made this season: The biggest change will come midseason, beginning Feb. 21, when, instead of 32 aspirants ousted at a rate of six per week, 24 contestants -- 12 men and 12 women -- will compete. At this point, "American Idol' will air three times a week -- on Monday, female contestants will vie for votes, with men showing off their chops on Tuesday. Wednesday's episode, as always,...

srah - Wednesday, 12 January 2005 - 10:44 PM
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Lost, in translation

I am an upstanding member of the community and would never do anything wrong. But if, theoretically, I had decided well into the season that I wanted to see the deserted-island drama Lost and had downloaded or was currently downloading the first eleven episodes, then what follows is what I would think of the episodes that I had seen (but of course, you understand, it's completely hypothetical because I would never ever download TV shows from the Internet): Alfie and I were watching episode 3 today and noticed that the supervising producer is Javier Grillo-Marxuach. I love it when his...

srah - Thursday, 23 December 2004 - 6:35 PM
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'I'll be seeing YOU at my MALL!'

Yet another rollicking season of American Idol is at an end. If you don't want to know who won and have the surprise spoiled for you, then read no further and go scratch out your eyes and plug up your ears, because it's hard to miss. I think two words defined the evening: Wardrobe Malfunctions. Fantasia's first words on discovering that she'd won the competition were a teary, "I broke my shoe!" - this coming after she'd already broken her necklace. When they brought the Final 12 back together for one last hurrah, they were all in yellow and white....

srah - Thursday, 27 May 2004 - 2:47 PM
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Rhythm is gonna get you... to dance?

This week's American Idol theme is the music of Gloria Estefan. John Stevens, we hardly knew ya. Oh god, this is going to be painful....

srah - Monday, 26 April 2004 - 9:13 AM
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Oh, how the mighty (sucky) have fallen

Sometimes you wonder what motivates people to go on American Idol. Clearly it is the allure of singing in really large, important venues....

srah - Friday, 16 April 2004 - 7:18 AM
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Jezzles says it's the best place he's ever been

Ever since I found out this week's American Idol theme is Elton John, I've been hearing Elton John songs wherever I go. So, thanks to this careful research, I am able to bring you this observation: Unacceptable songs to sing include Crocodile Rock, Benny & the Jets, Candle in the Wind and Circle of Life. If I hear any of these songs tonight, I will throw up and not vote for you! Yes, even you, John Stevens! If you forgo your birthright ("Daniel") and sing any of those rotten, overplayed songs, you are banished from my favor! AI prediction for...

srah - Tuesday, 6 April 2004 - 7:34 PM
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Fun with nesting ordered lists

My latest thoughts on American Idol: I didn't realize they told us these things in advance, but according to the AI website, this week's theme is Elton John. Boooo! While I like Elton John and I think people could do interesting things with it, I have heard rumours about a Show Tune week and I am still praying for the Neil Diamond Extravaganza. If America were not smoking crack, the next people eliminated would be: Camile Velasco Jon Peter Lewis Jennifer Hudson Fantasia Barrino Diana DeGarmo John Stevens* Jasmine Trias George Huff ... leaving Latoya London as the winner. However,...

srah - Saturday, 3 April 2004 - 1:26 PM
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I dreamt last night that I was in the audience for this week's American Idol. It was not on the usual stage - I think it was the stage at Pioneer High School. The judges weren't there, but I guess they were watching it on TV and would call in their comments. I was only able to see the first contestant before I woke up. John Stevens came out in a yellow bell-bottomed suit with a ruffly orange shirt and was surrounded by a pack of children who were supposed to chase him around the stage like adoring fans as...

srah - Saturday, 3 April 2004 - 9:39 AM
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She's always a trailer for sale or rent to me...

Dear John Stevens, It is sick sick sick that I can't take my eyes off of you when you're singing and I want you to be singing to me and I get your songs in my head for weeks after your performances. You are 16 years old and besides, tbone has already laid claim to you. I'm afraid it can never work between us, sweetie, so please stop giving me that entirely inappropriate 16-year-old come-hither look while you sing and making me want to jump into the TV. Sincerely, The Demon Dog (No, ha ha, just kidding) SRAH...

srah - Wednesday, 24 March 2004 - 7:07 AM
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Ah, William Hung. You are a household name.

... in our household anyway. (During a discussion of the Democratic candidates) me: The thing about Wes Clark is, he has no political experience. Dad: Yeah, and he has no professional training of singing....

srah - Monday, 9 February 2004 - 8:41 PM
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She bangs! Out some excuses!

tbone and I have come to the following agreement: American Idol is ruining our lives. We were both unhappy this week. We have decided that this is because we wasted most of our evenings by watching American Idol. Then after wasting our evenings in pointless entertainment, we had to either feel guilty about not doing homework during that time or feel tired when we stayed up after AI, doing said homework. Wouldn't you think that would make me resolve to stop watching the show, because it's interfering with my schoolwork and my happiness? No such luck. It's bonding time with...

srah - Saturday, 7 February 2004 - 2:04 PM
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Thou shalt have no Idol before srah

I've been watching a lot of American Idol lately. And I have come to the same conclusion that I know you all have: srah could totally be on this show. Srah would kick some ass on this show. Srah has the talent it takes to be Your Next American Idol. Srah will go up there, sing her song*, and blow you out of the park! Srah-- What's that? The point is not to suck? Then why are all of those people going on TV and doing it? Just to embarrass themselves in front of a national audience, without even getting...

srah - Wednesday, 28 January 2004 - 8:01 PM
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'It was that or skin my chauffeurs!'

Song in my head: "See My Vest" from The Simpsons Mental image to accompany song: Mr Burns in grizzly bear underwear *shudder* *gag* *contemplate suicide*...

srah - Saturday, 3 January 2004 - 11:50 PM
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Going back to Normalville

The Real World: Paris is over. Last night's season finale sucked, except for the return of Cheryl to our viewing party, which caused much sarcastic remarking and renewed accusations of sister-loving for Ace. The RealWorlders all remarked, before leaving their boring, boring lives in France to return to their boring, boring lives in the US, on how much they had grown as human beings and how they really appreciated learning about French culture. Growth? French culture? Were they living the same lives I was watching?? These people spent four months drinking Snapple in a chateau and emerging only to go...

srah - Wednesday, 26 November 2003 - 2:14 PM
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'I'm gonna walk you! One times one!'

I haven't done a Real World recap in weeks and weeks. I bet you thought you were safe. This week, we had two episodes to catch up on, because my cable TV connection was in Germany last week. The first was all about how the roommates dealt with the war in Iraq (pronounced EYE-rack). Different roommates dealt with this in different ways. Ace knelt at his Shrine to the Dubya and announced that everyone in the world should just get along and drink Kentucky bourbon together. Leah felt that we should get Saddam Hussein back for all of the people...

srah - Wednesday, 8 October 2003 - 12:41 PM
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'Regatta' is not a kind of cheese

For our first Social Systems & Collections paper, we have to examine the social systems and collections in the TV show The Restaurant. I have discovered, from watching the provided clips over and over again, that what reality TV shows us is that everyone on Earth except me is a friggin' moron. I'm not sure I want to be a human being anymore. Do you think the bunnies will have me?...

srah - Saturday, 27 September 2003 - 7:03 PM
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'Hey, they got the ocean here?'

I realize that I never recapped last week's Real World episode for all those of you who are interested. That's probably okay, because all of you are on vacation in Spain. So here's what happened: Leah and Simon made Mallory buy ugly, uncomfortable shoes. Fight the power, Mallory! Have a little backbone! Support your comfortably-shod sisters! Meanwhile, Adam was interested in this girl based on the very selective criteria that she had a pulse and spoke English. She wasn't interested in him, even though he was spending huge wadges of cash trying to make her love him. He also rapped....

srah - Tuesday, 9 September 2003 - 11:43 PM
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All aboard the Ace Train

The Real World was really lame this week. It's always lame, but this week it was lame in that I don't even have anything to say about it. Ace's girlfriend (or not?) came to visit and he got in a drunken fight with a taxi driver. On the bright side, next week brings about the Revival of Adam, the forgotten Worst Character Of All. He will bring home some chick no one likes, get mad when she won't kiss him, and take his sexual frustration out on the world by inflicting another of his famous raps on the viewing audience....

srah - Tuesday, 26 August 2003 - 11:54 PM
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Stop The Real World, I want to get off

I know you've missed the weekly screaming Real World recaps, but it was replaced by thirty-seven consecutive episodes of The Osbournes two weeks ago and I missed it last week. So this week I got a Double Dose of Reality! Yay! Dear Real World Cast, Once again, you've handed in your assignment at the last minute, and incomplete as well. Yelling at each about it is not going to get you your bonus. Suck it up and move on. I don't know how you can complain about student loans when you are being paid big bucks to do nothing and...

srah - Wednesday, 20 August 2003 - 9:25 AM
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À la Jerry Bruckheimer

Everything sounds more romantic and lovely in French. I have downloaded a clip from Tout le monde en parle where Jean-Claude Van Damme is one of the guests. Mmmmm, Jean-Claude Van Damme in French. WHAT????...

srah - Thursday, 7 August 2003 - 10:19 PM
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Château de cons

This week on The Real World... I like Ace a lot better since the idiots decided to barricade themselves in their château and refuse all contact with the natives. He is quite snuggly - at least according to Christina, his room- (and apparently sometimes bed-) mate. His snugglitude was enough to save him when he ate all of Christina (Mme Food Coveter)'s eggs. These people, despite being 7 in a house, are apparently too stupid to have communal groceries. I want to hit them. Christina went off on CT, thinking it was he who had eaten the eggs. Then when...

srah - Wednesday, 30 July 2003 - 11:44 PM
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I've got a fever! And the only prescription.. is more cowbell!

Spent last night alternating between downloading mp3s being a good, upstanding moral citizen of these here United States and running to the other room to watch Saturday Night Live's Best of Will Ferrell episode. The highlights were James Lipton's invention of the word scrumtralescent and Dissing Your Dog, which is exactly the same dog-training strategy I've been employing for years....

srah - Sunday, 27 July 2003 - 10:13 AM
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And yet more of The Real World

It was the third of June On that younger day Well I became a man At the hands of a girl Almost twice my age - Neil Diamond, "Desiree" For those of you who moved back to France just to avoid watching this show, I will torture you with the latest: Leah is mean and no one likes her. She has a brother named Pascual who is in 10th grade and who comes to visit. Christina and Mallory fight over Pascual. Mallory and Simon (!!!) smooch around in a club ("You know, Simon, you're a really good kisser." "Thanks. You're...

srah - Thursday, 24 July 2003 - 8:51 AM
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Based on drive-to-work conversation

How many characters on Head of the Class can you name, just off the top of your head? One of the IMDb user comments: Stretching the realms of plausibility is what makes sitcoms great! Well, actually, Alex P. Keaton is what makes sitcoms great. And he's not in this. So, it ain't great. And, what's more, it stretches the realms of plausibility. The students in the class are geeky. A little too geeky if you know what I mean. And they never get beaten up! I smell a rat, and that rat is of alien form. Yes, I think it...

srah - Thursday, 24 July 2003 - 8:37 AM
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Die, Real World, Die

I don't even want to waste cyberspace by telling you what an unbelievable freak of nature Adam is. I'm surprised nature hasn't eliminated him yet. I'm glad this show is only 30 minutes long because I might have had an aneurysm if it had lasted any longer. Also, watching the stupid stupids try to work together for their fakety fake-ass job, I realized that think I might hate group work, due to intense misanthropy. Robin and Cheryl tell me that U-M students do this sort of thing rather often, and it occurs to me that I haven't really done any...

srah - Wednesday, 16 July 2003 - 12:17 AM
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srah's Real World hatred and/or addiction

I HATE THE REAL WORLD. But I think everyone needs an outlet for rage, and mine is screaming and flailing, and occasionally just opening my mouth with nothing coming out, in awe at the stupidity of these stupid stupid people. CT is a dumbass and ridiculously difficult. You drop the straightening iron on the floor, you pick it up, whether you were using it or not. You don't get in an argument about whether someone is talking down to you. It's what you do. Leah is a whiner. Adam is an instigator. Simon is absent. Christina and Leah are cheap...

srah - Wednesday, 9 July 2003 - 9:43 AM
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srah's Real World update (yet again)

All of the people on The Real World are just as stupid as they were last week, and I still hate everyone except Simon. The good thing about this week's episode, though, is that they actually did something. Sort of. They had their first deadline this week for their ultra-important guidebook-writing job. Their assignments were due at 6pm. Two tried to get extensions, two emailed them at six, and the rest just sent them in late. This isn't college! You don't get extensions! This is real life! Okay, no, this is The Real World, which is fake real life, but...

srah - Wednesday, 2 July 2003 - 6:29 PM
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srah's Real World report #3 or whatever number we're up to

I hate The Real World. Every week, I get to the end of the episode and realized that I have wasted a half-hour of my life and that it has made me stupider. NOTHING EVER HAPPENS on that show. They bicker, they get drunk, they make out with each other... but they never do anything. Supposedly, they're working on a travel guide, but they never travel anywhere. I hate them all, but I will, of course, be back next week. I did learn something this week, and I don't know if it's a good thing. Robin and Cheryl told me...

srah - Wednesday, 25 June 2003 - 7:29 AM
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srah's Real World Update #2

Watched The Real World again last night. I hate these people. I hate this show. Here they are in Paris, supposed to be learning French, travelling around France, and writing a guidebook... and all they do is get drunk and bicker. I hate them, I hate the show. I'm so watching next week. In happier news, I finally caught on that this was actually filmed several months ago (the snow on the ground gave it away), so I have decided that I am in the background during one of my numerous trips to Paris. Watch for me! I am the...

srah - Wednesday, 18 June 2003 - 9:15 AM
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It has been decreed that I will become a Real World Watcher this season. Although I have never followed the show before, I agreed, because the show takes place in Paris this time and the contestants will have to learn French. I decided it could be amusing and watched the third episode last night. I hate them all. I hope Simon The Gay Irishman kills them all and eats them, because he's the only one who's any good. He can start with Ace The Alcoholic, who decided after two days that he hates France and hates the Parisians. Stupid boy!...

srah - Wednesday, 11 June 2003 - 10:46 AM
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Speaking of nerd-fancying

While watching Will & Grace, I found myself lamenting le fait que the character Barry soit gay. What a monstrous pile of franglais. Anyway, I was upset that he was gay because he's so cute and charming and it means that I will never have a chance with him. I will never have a chance with... a fictional character on TV. Because I would have a much better chance with him if he weren't gay. It's always nice when I can be in touch with reality like that. So I guess you're safe for the moment, Boyfriend. No Barries, gay...

srah - Thursday, 5 June 2003 - 10:36 PM
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srah's TV guide

Becky spent the evening flipping back and forth between the Stanley Cup finals and For Love or Money, and I spent the evening walking through and screaming at the télé while my cookies baked. My thoughts on the Stanley Cup finals are that I don't care who wins as long as it isn't Anaheim. So yeah, go Devils or whatever. I don't care how good Anaheim are or how long they've been around or how long ago the movie came out - I don't want to live in a world where the Mighty Ducks win the Stanley Cup. My thoughts...

srah - Tuesday, 3 June 2003 - 10:47 AM
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A Rubenful of coleslaw

So. American Idol's over. I called it. That is all I have to say about that....

srah - Thursday, 22 May 2003 - 12:44 PM
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srah finally catches ten minutes of American Idol

I don't quite see why my sister is obsessed with Clay because to me, he looks like the love child of David Bowie and Fraulein Maria. I have decided that Ruben is going to win, based on the following careful observation: in American Idol I, the guy with Sideshow Bob hair was the runner-up, so this time the runner-up will be the guy with Sideshow Bob feet....

srah - Thursday, 15 May 2003 - 9:23 AM
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We really don't have enough contact with the Portuguese in the US. I don't think I had given Portugal another thought since we learned about their XVIth century conquests and the Line of Demarcation. They seemed to disappear from history and geography after that. I desperately need to find an attractive Portuguese man. I am in danger of creating my entire image of XXIst century Portugal based on the two Portuguese men I've seen on TV, in C'est mon choix and Nice People. There must be interesting and attractive men in the country, but apparently they don't export well....

srah - Sunday, 27 April 2003 - 9:04 AM
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La question que tout le monde se pose

The damned Belgian on Nice People speaks five languages. The damned Belgian I'm visiting tomorrow speaks at least six. Why was I not born in Belgium? Sophie and I are both disappointed that our parents aren't foreign, as this would have given us a fine linguistic head-start. Being Belgian or Luxembourgeois wouldn't have hurt, either....

srah - Saturday, 26 April 2003 - 6:09 PM
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Shameless watcher of bad TV tells all

I watched the first episode of Nice People tonight. It's a reality show where they're locking young people of various European countries up in a villa, then voting them off one by one. A sort of cross between The Real World, Survivor, and an auberge espagnole. Personally, I think it's a shame that anyone has to be voted off, because the pleasure could just be from watching people from different nationalities interact, like the assistants do. Voting people off means we won't see them anymore and that someone will have to win. Yechhhh....

srah - Saturday, 26 April 2003 - 5:49 PM
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Easter morning in Vichy

We woke up this morning and Renata made us French French French French French French Toast. Then we ate cookies and chocolate-covered marshmallows, and watched Télé-Foot. We have come to the decision that we will reform the rules of soccer by requiring all footballers to remove their shirts after every goal. We feel that this would make a great difference to the sport and increase ratings in the ever-valuable Female and Gay Male demographics. Then we watched a crappy talk show where the subject was Who is the most seductive European? They brought on male guests from Norway, Italy, Portugal,...

srah - Sunday, 20 April 2003 - 12:01 PM
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Comic post turns sad

On our walk yesterday, Renata was Brian Fellowe. And the goat was a donkey. If you understand what that means, I salute you. And now all of a sudden I miss my grandpa, because he would have gotten it too....

srah - Monday, 10 February 2003 - 3:54 PM
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Apologies to Four Weddings

I am listening to the radio broadcast of the NRJ Music Awards on the radio. Phil Collins is mangling the French language, but I am so proud of him for speaking French at all. What happens at concerts where the singer doesn't speak the language? Do they just drop the between-song banter, do they do it in their native language and ignore the fact that the crowd probably doesn't understand, or is there someone there to translate? Mariah Carey is also at the awards. You may ask what I think of her. Unfortunately there I run out of words. Perhaps...

srah - Saturday, 18 January 2003 - 4:22 PM
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"Can I have a kitten?"

"But how am I supposed to teach English As A Foreign Language if I don't speak English as As A Foreign Language? Can't I just take Foreign As An English Language?" - Smack the Pony...

srah - Tuesday, 14 January 2003 - 5:43 PM
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Victoire allieroise

The horns were a-honkin' in the département de l'Allier last night as I walked home from Presles. In the distance, somewhere beyond the fog, fireworks could be heard. Nolwenn triumphant! Victory for St-Yorre and the Allier! Star Academy is over....

srah - Sunday, 22 December 2002 - 10:35 AM
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Make you drink from his special cup, Dr Robert

So, how was MDs?...

srah - Thursday, 26 September 2002 - 5:47 PM
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Is it Wednesday yet?

I realized no one's seen the new site yet because it's 7:30am on a Monday in the US. Never mind my loneliness. Don't forget to watch this on Wednesday!...

srah - Monday, 23 September 2002 - 7:36 AM
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Yay, it's over

Well, American Idol is over. Kelly won. Yippedy doo. We all knew she would, anyway. What am I going to do with myself now? Oh yeah, all of the stuff I should have been doing during the hours I've been wasting in front of the television. How did they manage to drag "You won. You lost" out for TWO HOURS? Ridiculous. I screamed at the television all night, but they just kept singing that same stupid song. My mom thinks that Kelly and Justin are going to get married and be like Sonny & Cher. I want to try out...

srah - Wednesday, 4 September 2002 - 10:21 PM
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And that is all I have to say about that

Yay! Nikki's gone. That's good. It was sad when she was forced to embarass herself on national television week after week. America has finally shown some mercy and let her go home. Now we'll have some real competition. Justin can sing, even if he looks like broccoli and acts like (to quote a Detroit morning radio show) Wayne-Newton-in-training....

srah - Thursday, 29 August 2002 - 8:01 AM
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American Idol update

I forgot to watch American Idol last night. Shame on me. Or perhaps... just the opposite....

srah - Wednesday, 28 August 2002 - 8:19 AM
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Why do I watch this show? Why do I suffer through it when it's so obviously fixed? Why do I keep putting myself through the torture, week after week, that is listening to Nikki sing?...

srah - Thursday, 22 August 2002 - 7:41 AM
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WHY do I watch this show? And admit it?

I can't believe Nikki is still on American Idol. R.J. sucks, but nothing like the heavy duty professional-strength vacuum of talent that is Nikki....

srah - Friday, 16 August 2002 - 10:24 AM
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O! The shame!

Would you still be my friend if I told you I've been watching "American Idol"? Has anyone else been watching? What did Sideshow Bob Justin do two weeks ago that was so bad? I must have the answer....

srah - Wednesday, 7 August 2002 - 11:09 AM
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What has he done lately, anyway?

An old episode of Saturday Night Live is on my TV right now. The host, Patrick Swayze, looks insane and is laughing like an idiot. I don't know why I felt it necessary to share. How do you feel about Patrick Swayze? My boss is a big fan. I don't get it....

srah - Thursday, 2 May 2002 - 1:37 AM
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More Oscar Whinging Thoughts

Yes, Gwyneth was awful. The dress was awful and made her boobies look droopy and wrinkly. And her eye makeup was scary. Barbra Streisand's dress was bad too. Did you see that one makeup guy or whatever he was in the fringy tuxedo? Hmmmm. Halle Berry's hysterical tears made me cry too. I'm such a pushover. Ian McKellen's boyfriend is VERY VERY YOUNG! There is still a chance for Alex. He was practicing what he would say when Sir Ian called him. (It was not "Sorry, I have a girlfriend." I have hidden his body somewhere the cops will never...

srah - Monday, 25 March 2002 - 10:58 AM
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Why did this exist?

Does anyone remember seeing "AlfTales" on TV? I don't....

srah - Monday, 25 March 2002 - 10:32 AM
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Graduation countdown: 46 days

46 days. I prided myself on never watching Survivor or any such "reality" series and never giving in to popular American culture. Then I went to France and along came "Loft Story". It was the French version of Big Brother, with a twist that the last male and female who remained in the house had to live there together for a month. The contestants were young and beautiful. When the show first started out, Sophie and I were addicted and would watch all of the updates. Our interest waned after a while, but I have to admit that I was...

srah - Tuesday, 19 March 2002 - 9:21 AM
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I hate hate hate hate hate Ross. I love love love love love Gunther. Chandler reminded me of Alex in this episode - from his nasty long hair to his sad jealous behavior. It was excellent. (Alex's reaction to this post: "How do you build a house of cheese?")...

srah - Thursday, 28 February 2002 - 10:02 PM
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I have been trying to remember this quote for days

"Goodness, I had no idea! For you see I have been on Mars for the last decade. In a cave, with my eyes shut and my fingers in my ears." - Sideshow Cecil, The Simpsons (ep: The Brother from Another Series) I know you don't care, but it's been bothering me. It's just sarcastic enough to have been the Comic Book Guy, but I couldn't find it when searching for his quotes. I have no life....

srah - Tuesday, 26 February 2002 - 2:25 AM
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Channel 35 is SCOLA. It probably stands for something. Scholastic Channel Of Language Aquisition, we'll call it. It shows news or other programs from around the world. They cram an amazing number of countries there so at any time of the day, you could be watching the Azerbaijanian news or a Quebecois variety show. Alex and I were flipping through the channels on Saturday and there was nothing on the first 33 channels. We got all the way up to SCOLA and they were having some kind of Taiwanese New Year celebration. My favorite part was this big song-and-dance extravaganza....

srah - Monday, 18 February 2002 - 9:14 PM
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I don't know if I really have a point or a message to this blog, but I felt like posting about the kinds of comedy I like. Then I shall invite you at the end to share your favorite types of comedy. We will all rejoice in the sharing that results. Animaniacs - I liked Animaniacs because it's fun for the kiddies, but it's fun for us, too. Adults, or whatever we are. It's funny on several levels and often plays off things that only older people would understand like current events, Jerry Lewis, or... Gilbert and Sullivan. Helloooooooo Nurse!...

srah - Thursday, 14 February 2002 - 5:01 PM
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I am listening to Johnny Mathis

I am listening to Johnny Mathis. My roommate is going to think I'm cracked out like a villain. "Wonderful Wonderful" always makes me think of that very disturbing "X-Files" episode. Consanguinity=bad....

srah - Monday, 26 November 2001 - 1:06 PM
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Srah's weekly JHAC-copied "Alias" recap/review

Srah's weekly JHAC-copied "Alias" recap/review (I promise, it's the last... unless Shepard becomes a recurring character...) Rather than a few brief encounters in the last fifteen minutes, JH was a major character in the first half hour of the show. It makes me wonder how this show is written, because it seems that they end one thread of a story very promptly on the half-hour or the quarter-hour. Anyway... When last we saw Sydney, she had a look of open-eyed and open-mouthed horror as she had discovered her partner with his neck slit. Mmmmm. Then along came the guards and...

srah - Monday, 26 November 2001 - 12:02 PM
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Watched "Alias" tonight

Watched "Alias" tonight because John Hannah was on. My thoughts? I'm lazy and have just copied my JHAC post. The first time I saw the photo of Shepard (John Hannah), I squealed and Alex rolled up into a little ball, making fun of me. It feels like it's been a long time since I've seen him in something *new*. I've seen old projects I just got ahold of, but it's been several months since TMR. For the longest time, I thought I was watching the wrong episode because there was no mention of Shepard and they didn't seem to be...

srah - Monday, 19 November 2001 - 3:49 AM
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I finally saw The Usual Suspects

I finally saw The Usual Suspects last night. An would be proud. It was good. I looooooooove Kevin Spacey. Alan Cumming is going to be on Celebrity Weakest Link. Almost makes one want to watch. Almost. "Mr Bojangles, you have a drinking problem..." Today I am finally going to watch Les Rivières pourpres. Yay! Nothing interesting to say. I spent the early part of the morning reading my wall to my roommate who wasn't listening but that's okay because I was mostly reading it to myself. I think I'm losing my French. 6 days to Potter. And more importantly, to...

srah - Saturday, 10 November 2001 - 12:08 PM
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ABC is a pile of poo

ABC is a pile of poo and postponed John Hannah's "Alias" episode till the 18th so Jillian and I watched the first half of "Uprising" instead. So far it isn't making much sense....

srah - Monday, 5 November 2001 - 12:15 PM
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