December 2007 archive

(14 entries)

December 31, 2007


Hello, my little chickens. Welcome to the end of the year! I hope that - although I have abandoned you for a week or so - you are all prepared with your yellow underwear and resolutions.

Let it be resolved that in the new year:

  • I shall actually get up off the couch and walk again
  • I shall actually record the walking that I do on Walker Tracker again
  • I shall endeavour to improve my nutrition
  • I shall continue to endeavour to improve my sociability
  • I shall put more time into my Arabic schoolwork

So let it be written, so let it be done! What are you going to do?

srah | 10:31 AM
Tags: holidays, new year, resolutions, underwear

December 22, 2007


I dreamt I was at the Vatican and they announced - to the the cheers of the masses - that instead of fish-finger sandwiches, they were going to be serving fish-patty sandwiches with marzipan. Also, some gypsies almost pushed the Pope over and the Dionne quintuplets were there.

srah | 8:34 AM
Tags: dream, fish, vatican

December 18, 2007

I'm a nerd, okay? Leave me be.

So much for my Writers' Strike plans. Instead of the Quantumleapapalooza I predicted, all of my television needs have been fulfilled by outsourcing.

Corner Gas
This Canadian series is running on Superstation WGN at bizarre hours like 11:30pm on Sunday night and 8pm on Wednesday. This is why I have only seen two episodes of Pushing Daisies, folks. It is not that I dislike Pushing Daisies, but something about Pushing Daisies makes my heart ache a little bit, and Corner Gas just makes me laugh. Be gone with you, angst! Instead we shall drive around in little cars.

Never Mind the Buzzcocks
The Flight of the Conchords LiveJournal community linked to a YouTubed episode of this British quiz show, on which Kristen Schaal (Mel from FOTC) was one of the panelists. So I went and watched it and was intrigued by her fellow panelist Noel Fielding (who, it turned out, was filling in for the regular captain of that team and was in a few other episodes I found). I, like Kristen, am in love with their culture despite the fact that I only understand about half of the jokes. I watched all of the episodes with Noel Fielding or anyone I had heard of (including Jermaine Jackson and David Cross), then in looking at Noel Fielding's IMDb profile I saw that he was in an episode of...

Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
I had seen a few clips from Garth Marenghi's Darkplace online and I did manage to watch the fourth episode (where Noel Fielding is pretty much unrecognizable in ape-makeup) online. Then the next day I went up to Ann Arbor and visited with Mike and Melissa, who recommended that we watch the series, which they have on DVD. So now I've seen all six episodes of the series (still have to track down Man to Man with Dean Lerner, though!). It is a parody of sci-fi/horror/80s television series, complete with purposely bad acting, editing, writing and set design. It is a marvel to behold.

The IT Crowd
I noticed that a lot of people involved with Garth Marenghi (including Richard Ayoade and Matt Berry) were also involved with The IT Crowd, which I had heard of a while ago, but had never gotten around to seeking out. Thank you, writers' strike! With nothing else on TV, I am inspired to search a little harder for my entertainment. Fortunately the whole series was online, so I ended up watching all twelve episodes in the span of about twenty-four hours. I pretty much went to work, slept, and watched The IT Crowd constantly for those twenty-four hours. I still don't quite understand how I did it. It's not really mathematically possible, but such was my love for The IT Crowd. It defied logic. And time. Then it was all done and I had to search for more shows. I was becoming a monster. (A few more clips, all from the same episode: the spider, the football conversation, and the personal ad.)

The Big Fat Quiz of the Year 2006
Back to my growing obsession with Noel Fielding. (He was in The IT Crowd, just not in any of those clips. I think his flat, stringy Goth hair disappointed me too much.) Apparently Channel 4 does an annual quiz show to review the past year in entertainment. Noel appeared in last year's quiz and [SPOILERS!!!] he and Russell Brand will be returning in the 2007 quiz to defend their title. It is about an hour and a half long, but seems longer when it's broken into eleven parts on YouTube. Fortunately those eleven parts were great. Do you like ice cream?

The Mighty Boosh
Everywhere I've gone in my quest to stalk Noel Fielding online, it was Mighty Boosh this, Mighty Boosh that. I watched the first two episodes of the first season and thought, 'Well, I don't know why everyone's so excited about that.' Fortunately I didn't let that stop me, because the secret is: the first two episodes of the first season are not that good (this is only my opinion, but it is true). But the rest is crackerjack! Throughout the series, The Mighty Boosh (the ensemble consisting mainly of protagonists Howard and Vince, but also their fellow hangers-on - Naboo the Shaman, his gorilla familiar Bollo and various characters played by Rich Fulcher) travel to Monkey Hell, befriend a polar bear, meet a man made out of cheese, bring a bubblegum vacuum cleaner to life, nearly get sexually assaulted by Yeti, accidentally summon the most evil demon known to man, travel through space, get propositioned by a Bailey's-loving fish-man, get into abusive relationships with coconuts on sticks, sell elbow patches, sing nonsensical songs, talk to the moon, shrink themselves down to battle the Spirit of Jazz and make out with each other, among other adventures. And, of course, the occasional cameo by Richard Ayoade as the shaman Saboo. I'd say it's something of a cross between Flight of the Conchords, The Lonely Island and Aqua Teen Hunger Force, if you can imagine such a thing.

The Big Fat Anniversary Quiz
Another hour-and-a-half-long quiz show, this time as a special event to celebrate Channel Four's 25th anniversary. And now I'm off to marry Richard Ayoade, if he'll have me. (Noel Fielding will be my backup.)

srah | 12:13 PM
Tags: boys, corner gas, garth marenghi's darkplace, never mind the buzzcocks, noel fielding, richard ayoade, the big fat quiz of the year, the it crowd, the mighty boosh, tv, writers' strike

December 15, 2007

'Mary doesn't even get to name her own baby? I woulda called him Bill.'

'Tis the season for lists, 'tisn't it? Last year I listed my favorite Christmas songs so this year I'll do my favorite Christmas movies. Maybe next year - if I remember - it will be books.

srah's Ultimate List of the Best Christmas Movies and/or Movies That Take Place at Christmas

  1. Home Alone - I actually haven't seen this in years, but it makes the list out of some sort of loyalty to my Not-So-Secret Twin.
  2. Christmas in Connecticut - I love Barbara Stanwyck and I love Cuddles Szakall. Never mind that I can't remember exactly what happens in the movie. I think there's a rocking chair.
  3. White Christmas - Like Singin' in the Rain, it has a tendency to veer off into song-and-dance numbers that have nothing to do with the plot, but it is beautiful and glorious in enormous, gorgeous Technicolor. Snow snow snow snow SNOWWWWWW!
  4. Miracle on 34th Street - The US Postal Service Saves Christmas!
  5. Elf - I don't think anyone really expected much from a "family-friendly" Will Ferrell movie, but here it is! A new Christmas classic!
  6. While You Were Sleeping - Not quite as Christmassy as some on the list, but it gets bumped up for being one of my favorite romantic comedies and for being the cinematic home of one of srahfam's favorite fictional characters of all time: Joe... Fusco... Junior.
  7. Love Actually - So many lovely stories, and also one about stalking.
    Daisy: ... and I'm the lobstah.
    Karen: The lobster? In the nativity play?
    Daisy: Yeah, first lobster.
    Karen: There was more than one lobster present at the birth of Jesus?
  8. It's a Wonderful Life - I always sort of wrote this off as a Christmas classic and never really looked at it as a movie, but just watch this. Jimmy Stewart is amazing.
  9. The Muppet Christmas Carol - Muppets! Music! Bean Bunny having the door slammed in his stupid bunny face!
  10. The Best Christmas Pageant Ever - You know why this is #1? It is #1 because YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT and this gives me awesome hipster cred because I have seen something you haven't. I'm so trendy I'm ahead of the trends. Also, I think it's Canadian, so I get double hipster points. Canada is very hip. Also, there is a young ruffian named Leroy presenting a ham to the Baby Jesus. Also, there is a sheet with balloooons on it. Also also also. Are you INTRIGUED yet? Go and find this movie!

Honorable Mention: In the Good Old Summertime has a Christmas song in it and the big reveal happens at Christmastime, but I wouldn't classify it as a Christmas movie. I would classify Van Johnson as dreamy, though.

What are your favorite Christmas movies? Which ones have I accidentally left out? Which ones have I purposely left out¹?

¹ "You'll shoot your eye out!" Also, anything involving Claymation.

srah | 12:04 PM
Tags: christmas, holidays, lists, movies

December 13, 2007

Right! Whatever that means!

Hey lady, you, lady!

I'm kind of obsessed with "I've Never Been to Me" today, after having woken up with it in my head this morning. It's sort of depressing, because I am neither living the kind of boring, discontented suburban life that Charlene longs for, nor have I spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that costs too much to be free. I must be missing out on something.

I've never been to Georgia or California or Nice or the isle of Greece¹ or even moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo. In fact, there is only one part of the whole song that applies to me: I have seen some things that a woman ain't s'posed to see.

¹ Which isle? Not that it matters, because I haven't been to any of them. I have been to the aisle at a production of Grease, though.

srah | 9:24 PM
Tags: frosting, lyrics, music, video


I dreamt last night that I sort-of-accidentally bought a terrible, terrible used car. I went to this dealership and basically bought the car based on looking briefly at a picture of it. Then the guy took me out to the car (which was a 1959 Harrington, or some such made up car name) and discovered that the part where the pedals were was open on top, so that your feet would get all wet. Also, I had no idea if it actually ran. But I had already signed something so the guy wouldn't let me back out of buying it.

I woke up with "I've Never Been to Me" by Charlene in my head, but I'm not sure what happened in between the car-buying and the song.

I recognize that this dream may be based on some anxiety that I know nothing about cars, but I hope it's not a premonition that I will have to go car-shopping any time soon.

srah | 12:52 PM
Tags: car, shopping

December 10, 2007

The hero/ Under the stairs is now the man who holds/ Our last true prayer

Listening to Harry Potter books-on-tape while driving seems like a good idea, until you're driving in the rain at the end of Deathly Hallows and you have to see through two levels of moisture. I don't have windshield wipers for my tears!

Good news: I was actually sad when Dobby died this time. Apparently Jim Dale's narration added something to the story that was not there when The Voice Inside Srah's Head was reading the book last summer.

Is it 2010 yet?

srah | 7:42 PM
Tags: books, driving, harry potter, harry potter and the deathly hallows

Love, look away

I hereby invite you all to take part in moe's 5BNM Homemade Xmas Gift contest so that I don't have to. What the heck do I know about crafts? I'm sure someone out there in readerdom is far craftier than me and wants to submit something terrible and/or awesome for moe to praise and/or make fun of.

Or just go over and read her blog. That works, too.

srah | 5:48 PM
Tags: bloggers, contest

December 9, 2007

What a hilaaaarious misunderstanding

Radio: Blah blah blah blah blah Les Miles.
me: Could we STOP TALKING ABOUT LES MILES? Les Miles doesn't want to be here. Les Miles rejected us. If Les Miles changed his mind and wanted us all of a sudden, I wouldn't want him. Just give it up already! Stop dwelling on stupid Les Miles and move on!
Radio: Blah blah blah Charlie Weis.
me: "Charlie Weis should probably eat less!"
srahfamily: ...
me: Um... I said, "l-e-s-s." But that works, too.

srah | 10:37 AM
Tags: conversation, football, university of michigan

December 7, 2007

Now on the sidewalk - ooh, sunny morning, uh huh - lies a body, just oozin' life

Question: Would it kill somebody to shovel the sidewalks in this godforsaken town?

Follow-up question: If so, who would that "somebody" be?

Can we just take a moment to consider whether his/her life is as valuable as me not slipping on the sidewalk and having warm, dry feet¹? I am thinking that - unless the "somebody" is me - my feet are probably going to win out. Ready the torches and pitchforks, everyone!

¹ I forgot to put on my boots when I went to class today².

² :(

srah | 12:45 PM
Tags: srahtown, weather

Then goes tromping around wearing BOOTS like Gaston

New winter bootsI can't remember when the last time was that I owned proper winter boots. My last pair of boots were lace-up style and came up to my ankle, more like hiking boots than waterproof, snowproof ones. And I lost those somehow (or threw them away?) before I moved down to Ohio. Boots are one of those things that I don't usually think of until I need them, and then when I need them the in-store selection is scant and/or strange. Fortunately this year I planned ahead and was able to find sensible, plain-looking, faux-fur-lined black boots. I can even tuck my trousers into them and save my cuffs from the muck, although with mid-calf black boots it looks sort of like I'm going riding.

It's a completely different world out there when you have boots! Whereas normally I would be mincing my way across the ice patches on the sidewalks, now I just trudge through the snow instead. When I brush the snow off my car, it does not fall into my shoe and get my socks wet. The only negative is that I have to remember to carry my shoes with me when I wear them, and that I have to do the Boot Dance, which consists of getting out of the boot and into the shoe while hopping on one foot so as to avoid putting your sock in a snow-puddle on the floor. It's been years since I've done the Boot Dance, so I am a little out of practice.

srah | 12:37 PM
Tags: boots, weather


I dreamt that I lived in this neighborhood in Ann Arbor that doesn't really exist but has shown up in my dreams before in the past. I think it's based on Pittsfield Village, mixed with the neighborhood in Ypsilanti where my friend Shannon used to live. Anyway, my family was looking out the window when a ball of fire came out of the sky and set fire to a patch of our neighbors' lawn. People kept coming over and trying to stomp it out, then they'd catch fire themselves, then spread it to other parts of the lawn. We kept yelling at them to call the fire department instead of trying to put it out themselves, then yelling again to put it out before the fire department got there, because it was only going to grow. I think I must have lost interest, because I have no memory of what happened with the fire after that.

Then a great big golden retriever came wandering over to us while we were out in the yard. It was a really huggable dog. I loved the dog, although I don't remember it doing anything other than being really patient while I hugged it a lot. Apparently I needed to hug something. I wanted to keep it, but we decided we had to take it home. The dog told me, "That's okay, I'm not far from home." I don't know how he did that - I don't remember the dog talking, so it must have been some kind of telepathy. He had this GPS thing on his collar so I looked at it and it said he was only a few blocks from home. So the talking dog was right!

We found his house and walked right in with the dog. The couple was watching TV in a room in the back of the house. I hugged the dog some more in their hallway, then we got their attention. They thought we were weird for bringing the dog back, but apparently it frequently happened that people would find their dog wandering around and would return him into the house. So they just always had random strangers in their house. I turned on a TV in their entryway so that I could watch SNL or 30 Rock or something, but then we decided we should probably do that at home.

Goodbye, huggy dog!

srah | 6:58 AM
Tags: dream

December 6, 2007

Don't need no hateration, hypenatin' in this dancery

I recently read this New York Times article about name-changing after marriage (I especially liked the anecdote¹ about the couple who played a softball game - his family vs her family - for naming rights to the family). I read the readers' comments afterwards and now I mostly just want to exterminate all human life on earth. It drove me up the wall that so many people were advocating for people to hypenate their names. Actually, it annoyed me an equal amount when people complained about hypenating names. I have never hypenated anything in my life. This is because (no matter what the whole Internet seems to think) THERE IS NO SUCH WORD AS HYPEN.

Unless, perhaps, you are writing a Mary J Blige-style song where the words are all made up anyway. I do enjoy a good dancery.

¹ Not antidote. Don't make me exterminate all human life on earth again.

srah | 5:03 PM
Tags: english, language

December 3, 2007

We need a little Christmas right this very minute soonish

I placed an order on December 1st. I only waited as long as the 1st because I wanted to make all of my purchases at once, so as to be eligible for the Free Super Saver Shipping. It seemed like a good day, though. It certainly wasn't last-minute, but I wasn't making my Christmas purchases in August, either. By the 1st I had a pretty good idea of what I needed to buy online vs in the store, so I made my purchase.

When I was done, I checked the order online and saw that the estimated delivery date was December 28-January 11. What the heck? If I am buying things from Amazon (and not one of their outside provider-people) that are listed as being in stock, how is it possible that it will take 27 days to complete the order? That is terrible! I ended up going back and changing the shipping options to the next-cheapest one, so they're now saying that it'll probably be here by the 24th. That's actually not any better for me because I'm leaving for Ann Arbor on the 21st or 22nd, but I'm hoping that they're just overestimating. This is impossibly ridiculous. What I'm hoping is that everything will get here very promptly and that they just dramatically overestimate the processing time so as to trick gullible people (like myself) into paying for shipping instead of getting it for free.


srah | 12:25 PM
Tags:, christmas, holidays, shopping

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