October 2006 archive

(15 entries)

October 31, 2006

A public service announcement from one of the best shows ever

Happy Halloween and/or Cari's birthday!

srah | 6:34 AM | TrackBack
Tags: animaniacs, halloween, holidays

October 30, 2006

Dream

I dreamt the other night that I took some time off work to go back to Ann Arbor and went to this SI lecture that was held in a trailer, way back in the wilds in some obscure corner of a University of Michigan campus. On the way I crossed a street behind this girl who was talking to her friend about studying abroad. I interrupted them and gave her all kinds of advice and she followed me as I walked toward the lecture, then she was going to have to find her way back to civilization on her own. I went into the trailer and was met by somebody who was there during my time (so it must have been a professor or a doctoral student) who said they were so glad someone actually came who wasn't required to for class. There was a potluck lunch so I dug in. The speaker was a midget version of Borat in brightly colored M.C. Hammer pants, who came from some unidentified African country that wasn't Mozambique (he referred to Mozambique as "The Land of February", whatever that means). I had the impression he was pretty offensive, although I can't remember him actually doing anything offensive.

srah | 7:35 PM
Tags: borat, dream, school of information, university of michigan

October 29, 2006

What power?

To whom it may concern:

Although I often use my Evil Voodoo Powers to curse the Detroit Tigers, I will have you know that I did nothing to influence the World Series, because I had already given up on caring what the Tigers did this season.

srah | 12:18 AM
Tags: baseball, detroit tigers, sports

October 28, 2006

Ohhhh, huggy hugs

On 30 Rock this week, Tina Fey's character bonded with another single 30-something woman over their common fear of choking and dying alone in their apartments and not being discovered until their neighbor's dog starts sniffing and scratching at the door. Bridget Jones had a similar fear of dying alone and being eaten by alsatians¹. I am not 30-something, but - as an inveterate worrier, I also have plenty of these fears. When I hear scary scary reports about rabies on NPR, I start thinking, "What will I do when I am inevitably attacked by rabid wild animals?" When I lose my balance on the stairs, I think "What if I fall and hit my head and pass out and get brain damage and can't move my neighbors all take the other staircase and my lifeless corpse is found weeks from now, after I've starved to death?" Yes, I have a really really overactive imagination.

When I was at the mall today, wondering if I had a concussion and therefore if I should drive myself home or not, I got to thinking: What would I actually do if I determined that I had a concussion? Who could I call to drive me home? I really ought to make some friends around here, even if it's just to have someone to give me a ride or some huggy hugs when I have a concussion or to save me when I'm being ravaged by a rabid raccoon.

¹ The dog, not people from Alsace.

srah | 7:54 PM
Tags: fears, imagination, loneliness, srahtown

Doctor Piglet, Doctor Winston, practice your art

Good news! I do not have a concussion... I think.

This afternoon I went a-returnin' things that I bought before my trip, which I later decided I didn't need. When I got to the mall in Cincinnati, I opened my truck to get out the shoebox, reached in, and the FIERCE STRONG WINDS blew the trunk lid down on my head. Tears came to my eyes and I sort of stumbled through the parking lot in a haze, wondering if I had a concussion. I returned my shoes, wandered in and out of stores, checked my pupils in the restroom mirror and - lo and behold! - received a phone call from my own personal athletic trainer and dispenser of medical advice. I didn't know if MOPATADOMA was at work and hadn't wanted to bother her, but when I told her my symptoms, she concluded that since my pupils matched in size, I wasn't nauseous, my eyes focused pretty well and the headache I had came only from the part of my head where the trunk lid hit, it probably wasn't a concussion after all, but that I should avoid falling asleep just to be safe. I assured her that I had no plans to go to sleep in the mall, and she said that was a definite sign that I didn't have a concussion, as the number one goal of everyone with a concussion is to find a mall and sleep in it. See, this is why I consult my sister on these medical matters: she is clearly an expert.

So now I'm back home and I'm pretty sure I don't have a concussion, but I am still terrified of ever going to sleep. Can't sleep! Concussions will eat me!

srah | 6:53 PM
Tags: alfie, concussion, health

Hooray for ABC's free online replays!

Dear Ugly Betty,

Walter traps you under a net and won't let you go until you say you'll miss him, even if you won't. Henry is dressed like Superman (or Superaccountant) under his clothes. I think the choice is clear. Don't be Stupid Betty!

srah | 1:50 PM
Tags: tv, ugly betty

October 27, 2006

Semi crash causes pea spillage

Things that are difficult:

  • Eating peas with a fork

Things that are almost impossible:

  • Eating peas with a fork in complete darkness

Last night, I was very much looking forward to the opportunity to watch Ugly Betty live for the first time (rather than on tape or on the Internet), since The Office was a repeat. Then at just about 8pm, the power went out. I waited for a few minutes, but it didn't come back. I panicked at first, because I had to traverse the clutter of my apartment to scrounge around for my flashlight, whose batteries turned out to be of questionable power. I was picturing being stuck in the darkness, unable to move for fear of knocking things over and stepping on things. Then I talked to Andy on the phone and he asked me if I had any candles, which of course I did. I am an idiot and had forgotten how people survived in Ye Olden Tymes before eckeltricity. Since I no longer had to panic about my one source of light giving up, I was able to sit around bored in the candlelight instead of sitting around bored in the darkness. I could finally finish my dinner, instead of blindly stabbing at peas.

The lights eventually came back on, but I was so bored I just went to bed.

srah | 7:13 PM
Tags: power outage

October 25, 2006

Chex Mix is on the house!

Oh, by the way, HAPPY FREAKIN' BLOGIVERSARY TO ME! My blog is now five. Congratulations, blog. Maybe we will send you to kindergarten and you will learn to write yourself so I don't have to.

Let's all harken back to that day, five years ago, when this blog exploded, fully-grown and on its horse, from my forehead:

The Internet is fostering a disturbing trend of self-promotion. That's all it's really about, anyway. Everyone has their own personal website advertising themselves and their interests (hey, me too). Why? Who actually cares about half the stuff that's on their website? Maybe it's all in the hopes that someone will come along and say "Hey, I like Star Wars and Buffy the Vampire Slayer too. We must be soulmates" and they will find love and live happily ever after. Maybe everything we do is in some way caused by our need to be loved and appreciated. Or maybe not. I want some Chex Mix.

Sometimes I think the world has gone completely mad. And then I think, "Aw, who cares?" And then I think, "Hey, what's for supper?"
- Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey

So true, blog, so true. Now I want some Chex Mix.

srah | 8:01 PM
Tags: blogging, blogiversary, holidays

Dream

I dreamt last night that instead of living miles from Ohio's border with Indiana, I lived miles from Ohio's border with Italy. My family took a wrong turn and ended up in Ravenna, Italy, so we checked out a gift shop, which was owned by an old Amish lady. My grandma turned out to be chillin' in the café there. I looked over the things for sale in the gift shop, like "Greatest Hits of Ireland" and "Greatest Hits of Spain" CDs, but I didn't have any Euros. Then we went out to watch the harness races.

I have never been to Italy, so I can only assume that it actually is full of Amish people, gift shops, my grandma, CDs from other countries and harness racing. Right?

srah | 7:52 PM
Tags: dream

October 18, 2006

I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I'm so... sleepy!

I'm home! I'm jetlagged! It's 5:30 and I'm wearing pyjamas! I went to bed at 9 last night and woke up at 5 this morning! I am confused!

I didn't check my email or read blogs while I was gone! It is going to take me forever to catch up! But for now I think I will take a nap!

Here is some wildlife I saw in London! He wants a hug!

srah | 5:32 PM
Tags: jet lag, travel

NaNoPuMo

Is anyone doing NaNoWriMo this year? I haven't given it much thought, but it is that time of the year again. Last year I basically gave up when I realized my brain had puked out a protagonist I hated (an alcoholic clown? WHY?), so hopefully things will be better this year.

srah | 5:15 PM
Tags: nanowrimo, nanowrimo 2006, writing

October 6, 2006

Twinkies and ding-dongs won't do

Last week I followed a link in Dooce's links blog to a YouTubed video by New Kids on the Block. I mostly missed the New Kids train back in the late 80s. I was busy, as is my wont, listening to oldies and musicals instead of The Hip Trendy New Music The Kids Are Listening to. I did not have New Kids dolls or a New Kids sleeping bag or a New Kids Trapper Keeper. I was aware of them, and knew the tunes of their songs and all, but I didn't have <old man voice>the cable teevee</old man voice> to watch music videos, I didn't buy a modern music tape until I was in 6th grade¹, and I was for some reason afraid of listening to the pop music stations on the radio in case a swear word came on (seriously!).

Once I started middle school, I discovered Weird Al Yankovic, the main musical influence of my early teen years. This means that there are lots of Weird Al parodies out there that I know better than the original song. One of these is:

The first one was a sweet one
Second one was a blast
Soon I finished off the bag, ate 'em up real fast
You can see 'em in my teeth
Tell it when I talk
Had so many my pancreas just went into shock
- Weird Al Yankovic, "The White Stuff"

After Dooce pointed me to the video for "Step By Step" I continued through the New Kids video oeuvre until I found the video for "The Right Stuff". It's somehow shocking to my brain every time they get to that part in the song and the word "pancreas" doesn't come up. It's THERE in the SONG... isn't it?

New Kids on the Block videos are like a time machine back to a terrible terrible part of our history. Witness the mullets, the hats, the vests, the pegged pants... and the bizarre cowboy jig they do for the first time at approximately 1:22.

What IS that dance? Was that dance ever cool?

¹ Amy Grant, "Heart in Motion"

srah | 10:35 PM
Tags: middle school, music, new kids on the block, video, weird al yankovic

Travel blogging... ish

All I seem to blog about these days is TV. That and walking, and occasionally the odd dream or two. That's not unusual, because I don't do much more than work, watch TV, walk and sleep. Occasionally I do laundry. I know, it's really exciting.

Well, I'm off for a site visit to three universities in England and Ireland tomorrow. I don't know what kind of adventures and scrapes I'll get into, but I'm sure that it will be more interesting than my life here. In fact, I will probably be so busy that I won't have time to blog about all the fascinating things I'm doing. So, you know, from your perspective: same ol' same ol'.

srah | 10:22 PM
Tags: blogging, travel

I'm... just looking

I wish people at work watched The Office, because all day today I wanted to demand a Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch!

srah | 10:00 PM
Tags: the office, tv

October 2, 2006

Srahrles in Charge

If I were in charge of the world, there would be a TV station that played episodes of The Cosby Show twenty-three and a half hours a day. At midnight, there would be an episode of Saved by the Bell to ensure that I would eventually turn off the TV and go to bed.

srah | 7:21 PM
Tags: saved by the bell, the cosby show, tv

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