May 2005 archive

(32 entries)

May 26, 2005

You would think they'd be able to save themselves, what with the friggin' lasers on their heads...

Apete and I went to the Common Grill last night, filled up on appetizers and split the Chilean Sea Bass as our entrée. As the waiter set the plate on the table, he informed us that we were the lucky eaters of the last Chilean Sea Bass. That the Common Grill would be serving. EVAR.

Apparently the sea bass have been put on the endangered species list and their suppliers are just selling off the stock that they have left. At first, we felt guilty about it - when the waiter stopped by to see how our food tasted, I wailed a plaintive, "Endaaaaaaaangered..." - but then I discovered a way to justify it. At any earlier point in my life, if I ate a sea bass, that would mean they'd have to fish one more out of the ocean for the next person who wanted one, so every sea bass I ate would decrease the population. Whereas in this situation, this fish was already dead and eating it wouldn't make anyone kill another one. If we didn't eat it and help finish off the finite supply that the fishmongers had left, someone else would. It just meant that we got one of the last ones and you didn't, nyah nyah nyah.

I'm not sure if I would avoided ordering it if I'd known about its status before I ordered, but anyway, this fish was endangeredly delicious. Good luck with your population growth, little fellas.

Update: Apete has sent me a chart of fish that are good to eat and not so good to eat!

srah | 7:08 PM | TrackBack
Tags: apete, chilean sea bass, common grill, endangered species, fish, food

He felt the need... for speed?

I've heard quite a bit lately about Tom Cruise's appearance on Oprah earlier this week. Most of the comments have been about Tom jumping on the furniture and basically looking like he was on drugs, but for me the most disturbing point was when he said, "What I love most about Katie is her gen--"

There was an awkward pause between the first syllable of the word and those that followed and it allowed my brain to fill it in with the first thing that came to mind. That's sick, Tom. I know you're trying to show America that you like girls and all, but it really sounds like you're trying too hard when you announce "What I love most about Katie is her genitalia." Ew. Who talks like that? Maaaaaybe if you'd said, "You know what? I'm a straight man and I like vaginas," it would have been more convincing...

"--erosity."

srah | 5:36 PM | TrackBack
Tags: tom cruise, tv

Or care!

It's 9:22 am and I still don't know who my American Idol is!!!!!1

Update: Bleaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhh...

srah | 9:22 AM | TrackBack
Tags: american idol, american idol 4, tv

May 25, 2005

Try saying it out loud

I was just thinking that I would like to form an organization called Emerging Professionals in International Education and then be elected as head of this organization so that I could print up business cards that say:

Chair, EPIE.

*grooooooaaaaans*

srah | 4:15 PM | Comments (7) | TrackBack
Tags: international education

'I get it! French class!'

I bet Little Debbie® allowed their product to be used in the movie so that whenever we saw Honey, I Shrunk the Kids, we would think of Oatmeal Creme Pies. But whenever I see Oatmeal Creme Pies, I think of Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.

Do you have any examples of your own of this backfiring product-placement?

srah | 3:07 PM | TrackBack
Tags: food, honey i shrunk the kids, movies

May 23, 2005

I just want to make Yoda's Toes cookies!

George Lucas has whored Star Wars out to everything else, so why can't I find some damned Star Wars cookie cutters in this town? If you have Star Wars Cheez-Its™ and a wookiee with a lollipop growing out of his head and Lucas Crazy Hair, why can't I find some boring old cookie cutters?

Sometimes I think that George Lucas was sent to Earth with the sole purpose of tormenting me.

srah | 11:53 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
Tags: star wars

Bleep bleep bloop

What kind of nerd am I? Here it is, May 23 and I haven't yet blogged about Star Wars Episode III. Well, I was having trouble organizing my thoughts into cohesive sentences, so instead I bring you some bullet points, hidden in the extended entry so as not to spoil things for those of you who ain't seen it yet.

srah | 11:31 AM | TrackBack
Tags: movies, reviews, star wars, star wars: revenge of the sith

St3@my sh3lv1ng @ct10n!!!!! carburetor toothpick

Across the street, they are having some kind of nursing conference entitled "ALL NURSE ACTION DAY."

Nurse action, eh? Will it be h0t nur$3 @ct10n? Nur$3 0n nur$3 @ct10n? I think the price you pay for being one of those "sexy" professions is that you have to be careful with what you name your conferences. As far as I know, the American Library Association's next conference theme is not "Letting our Hair Down and Getting it on in the Stacks."

But I could be wrong. I don't get those emails anymore.

srah | 10:27 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Tags: librarydom

May 22, 2005

Dream

I dreamt last night that I went to Cold Stone Creamery and got coffee ice cream with Oreos™ and Legos™.

srah | 10:19 AM | TrackBack
Tags: dream

Unconscious Mutterings

Free ashoshiashuns. Zey are here.

srah | 2:56 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Tags: memes, unconscious mutterings

May 18, 2005

Hannibal the Hornet lies in wait

I have just discovered that I am deathly afraid of bees! Oh boy, another phobia/neurosis to add to the list!

There is a member of the bee family in my office. I always lump anything together that is black and yellow and has a stinger attached to it as a "bee" but I think this one may be a hornet. I am basing this on the fact that when it stopped flying around and I got a look at it, it looked exactly like this*, only slightly less cartoonish.

I've never been stung by a "bee" and my hypochondria and overactive imagination like to remind me that, having never tested it out, I have no way of knowing if I am among that percentage of the population who are allergic to bee stings. So I knew I didn't like the buggers, but I didn't realize the extent of this fear until this one entered my office.

It was a dark and stormy night. He flew into my office and demanded that I take the case. Of all the offices in all the world, he flies into mine. "Listen, Jack, I don't take that from no one, you hear?" I spat in his face--

Wait. I am not Humphrey Bogart**. I am not a private investigator. And a hornet's face is too small to spit at. So instead it went a little, as Strong Bad would say, a-like-a thees:

I heard a buzzing behind my head, but there is construction going on across the street so you hear all kinds of noises. It wasn't until he flew into my peripheral vision that I saw him, and even then I thought he was a fly. I grew suspicious and my suspicions were confirmed when he alighted*** on the wall and I could see his stripes and his little hornety face.

As long as he is on the move, I am paralyzed. When I hear the buzzing, I have to find the source and watch him. I don't know what to do with him. Being scared of bees, I don't want to do anything to antagonize him, but I want him gone. I have to know where he is at all times because I'm terrified that he's going to land on me and that I am going to freak out and swat at him and make him angry and he's going to sting me and I'm going to go into shock and die and it will be made even sadder by the fact that our office has been temporarily relocated to the fourth floor of the University Health Services building for the summer and I am going to die of a bee sting while just one floor down, doctors and nurses and other health professionals go about their business, unaware of my plight but even if they knew they probably wouldn't do anything because I don't have student status anymore and OH MY GOD, did something just land on me no that's my hair I'm okay I'm okay I'm okay it's okay, everything's going to be okay.

He's taken up residence on the light fixture for now, so I'm okay for a few minutes. Time to get some work done before he takes off again and all I can do is stare...

–––––
* I Googled "charlotte hornets" to find this link, only to learn that they've moved to New Orleans. How do you people expect me to know anything about basketball if no one tells me these things? Am I supposed to find out on my own? Am I supposed to watch basketball in order to understand what's going on? Next thing, you're going to try to convince me that the Pistons don't suck anymore and won the NBA Championship last year. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Nice try.
** Or "HumBo," as I like to call him. But not to his face.
*** "Alit"?

srah | 11:10 AM | TrackBack
Tags: bees, fears, health, hypochondria, readers' choice

May 17, 2005

Taking some time for livin'

Interesting things my friends are doing this summer:

  • Working at an unidentified international organization in Geneva
  • Starting a month-long art camp in India

Interesting things I am doing this summer:

  • Applying for jobs
  • Reading
  • Baking cookies (hopefully)

It's not so bad, really. I'm happy that I do have people to live vicariously through - it lends my summer a little drama while allowing me to be cozy and comfortable at home.

srah | 11:17 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack
Tags:

May 16, 2005

Would you like some Wisconsin cheese to go with that Wisconsin wine?

The Supreme Court ruled this morning that state laws against the importation of wine from other states are unconstitutional. In other news, Amazon.com has ventured into another online sales market: wine. Hmmm.

Srah likes this idea. I don't know quite how it will play out and whether it only applies to domestic wines, but it always frustrated me that a few foreign wines I liked had no Michigan distributor so I couldn't buy them here. If they do extend it to beers and liquors, I wonder what effect that will have. Will a Yuengling still be so delicious and so craved by Pennsylvanians once you can get it everywhere?

[Washington Post article via threegoldfish]

srah | 12:36 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack
Tags: alcohol

Guess what? There's a song in my head!

Why are we always deliberately antagonizing the shareef? Why don't we do something he likes for a change?

srah | 12:04 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
Tags: music

Skim is fo' suckahs!

On the way to work today, I stopped to get an iced chai. I need some kind of beverage to keep me awake in the morning and iced chai is my new kick.

"Whole milk or skim?" the counterperson asked me. I replied that I wanted whole milk and both of the people working there cheered. Apparently skim is the popular choice, so they get really excited when someone chooses the other. I said, "Life's too short to drink skim milk" and they agreed. We bantered some more over my newly-acquired punch card and now we are Best Friends.

I totally want to go back there every day now, just because of this one experience. This is how the service industry should be! You guys win!

srah | 10:13 AM | TrackBack
Tags: chai, food, service

I am a geeeeeeeenius!

I went to Cold Stone Creamery last night, home of the most annoying ice cream makers in the world. You know you are singing too often and too loudly when customers' orders can't be heard over your noise. Sigh.

Anyway, Cold Stone is a place where you make your own ice cream. They have ice cream bases and things to mix in, then they mix it for you and give it to you. I have to say, it's not that different from something like a Dairy Queen Blizzard, except it's served in a dish instead of a cup and you have better selections of things to mix.

So back to me being a genius. I got the "sweet cream" base, which is pretty much the same base that is normally used in cookies & cream ice cream. So it seemed natural to add Oreos™ to the mix, but I also added roasted almond pieces and black cherries. It was the best combination ever, because I am a genius.

I just wanted to share with you, so that you can follow in my footsteps someday and be inspired by my genius.

Delish.

srah | 8:41 AM | TrackBack
Tags: food

May 15, 2005

Unconscious Mutterings

Free associations made and typed. Srah out.

srah | 2:11 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
Tags: memes, unconscious mutterings

May 13, 2005

Boy, stop crying wolf!

The smoke detector keeps chirping but nothing is cooking or burning.

Now the tornado siren is going off and neither the TV nor weather.com nor the bright sky outside leads me to believe that there is actually a tornado going on.

Are you trying to FRIGHTEN me to death? Just burn me or tornado me already, for heaven's sake. Is it some kind of Friday the 13th prank?

srah | 5:42 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack
Tags: weather

A furry mammal called 'blog'

Beware, established media! Here come the blogs! And The Daily Show is on the story!

[via Chasing Amy]

srah | 4:07 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
Tags:

May 12, 2005

'Cuuuuuuke... reach out with your peeeeelings...'

I'm sorry to hurt you in this way. I'm sorry to present you with something that is so much better than anything you'll see next Thursday:

Store Wars

(My favorite is Chewbroccoli!)

[thanks to apete]

srah | 6:00 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
Tags: star wars

Duck-duck! *goose*

I sometimes wish that my pockets were constantly full of corn.

How often do you hear someone say that? When I see ducks waddling around, I want to express my love for them in some way. Oh ducks! So cute and waddly in the wild and plump and delicious in an orange sauce! There is something about the sight of a duck that just makes me feel all happy and squishy inside.

If I carried my camera around with me everywhere I went, my Flickr photostream would be full of duck photos. You're lucky I don't.

No pockets of corn, no cameras to capture little ducky souls with. Instead I just stand for a while in front of them, appreciating and quacking and attempting to commune. Thanks for existing, ducks.

srah | 9:05 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack
Tags:

Sarah? Bitch about the weather? Never!

I cut through the Chemistry building today on my way out of work. As I walked through the building I realized my face was wet because my tear ducts had frozen up and tears were now melting all over my face.

Weather, it is May 12. This service is unacceptable. I would like to talk to your manager and I will have you know that I will not be leaving a tip.

srah | 9:05 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Tags: weather

May 11, 2005

Second insult: They haven't even called me back!

I went out shopping the other day and they didn't have what I was looking for, but took my name and number so that they could contact me when it came in. I said, "It's Sarah... with an H" as I often do when telling people what my name is. I watched upside-down as the girl wrote "Shara."

"Shara" is not Sarah-with-an-H. Shara is Shara. It's a completely different, made-up name! Do I have a speech impediment I'm not aware of, that turns my S's into Sh's?

Bah.

srah | 12:05 PM | Comments (9) | TrackBack
Tags: srah

May 9, 2005

In the red

I logged into Friendster this morning and happened to spot their new "joint horoscopes" thing, where they tell you whether you're having a high, medium or low compatibility day, marked by green, yellow or red symbols. No one I know has a green symbol today. Am I going to be so miserable to be around today that no one is compatible with me? I'm so depressed. This may end up being a self-fulfilling prophecy!

srah | 8:56 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
Tags: philosophy & religion

On my brief foray into Real Life

I kicked off my shoes, and felt the good earth beneath my feet
I loosened my tie, and felt what it feels like to breathe
I found the secret to life
I took some time for living

I took off my watch, and found I had all the time in the world
I opened up my arms, so I could hold life like a beautiful girl
I laid down all of my hang-ups forever
I looked around, and saw what sweet things can be found
Simply by taking some time for living
Grooving on little things life is giving
From now on I'm taking time out for life

- "Time for Livin'", The Association

I've been taking some time for livin'. By livin' I mean "actually reading a book for the first time in months." It's been funny - I only go to work when there's something for me to do, which means that I work really hard when I'm at a computer and I run around and do other, non-computer things when I'm not at work. I've been shopping, I've gone bowling, I've gone out with friends, I've been to Grandma's, I've been to Frankenmuth, I've finished a book and started another.

It's been nice. Sorry I haven't been keeping up the bloggage. My schedule is muddled and disorganized, and therefore my thoughts are a bit too.

srah | 8:34 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
Tags:

May 8, 2005

Unconscious Mutterings

Unconsciously muttered: my free associations. Read on for more.

srah | 10:26 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Tags: memes, unconscious mutterings

May 6, 2005

You watch your phraseology!

Sometimes I have conversations with people in my head. Earlier today I was thinking about telling a colleague about my future plans in international education. I would eventually like to do both the "import" and "export" sides of international education: international student advising and study abroad advising. But for now I'm mostly applying for study abroad advising. In my head, I expressed this to my colleague as:

"I think I like advising people to go away more than telling them to come here."

Perhaps not the best way to put it, but so true on so many levels.

srah | 1:55 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
Tags: job search

May 3, 2005

Man, it's so loud in here

I've shied away from online CD swaps for about a year now, after having some bad experiences last year where I received zero or one CD from a group of three or four swappers. But I decided to give it a try on Neurotic Fishbowl's latest:

"Music that makes you want to roll down your windows/open your sunroof/put down your convertible top and sing along at the top of your lungs."

Read on for my track listing if you're interested (swappers, spoil it at your own risk!). Yes, I am a dork.

srah | 10:33 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack
Tags: cd swap

Everything I know about grammar I learned from Mad Libs

In honor of Day Old's National Adjective Day, I would like to share a few that I like:

  • ephemeral
  • vulpine
  • contumacious (of course)
  • feral
  • languorous
  • naïve
  • mischievous
  • vacuous
  • sumptuous
  • avuncular

How about you?

srah | 9:34 AM | TrackBack
Tags: holidays, memes, national adjective day

May 1, 2005

Saturday Movie Meme thing (on Sunday)

I was planning to write something about the movie I saw last week, but I'm terrible at movie reviews ("Movie X is good. You should go.") so I decided to do a meme instead:

1. The last movie you went to see in a theater:
The Chorus (Les Choristes). It was good. You should go. It's a French movie about a new surveillant (I forget how they translated this word - something like supervisor?) who arrives in a school for troubled boys. He has a past as a musician and forms a chorus in the school that brings the boys together and uses their energy in a positive way and etc. etc. etc. It was really big in France last summer, but alas I was living in the middle of nowhere and didn't get a chance to make it to a town to see it there.

I laughed, I cried, I recommended it to you.

2. The last movie you watched at home:
At my home: The African Queen
At someone else's home: E.T. (the new, messed up CGIed version)

3. How many movies do you own?
I have no idea how many I own myself. When I move out, I'm sure there will be much heartache over that question, when we divide up what goes with me and what stays behind and I discover that everything with Harrison Ford in it belongs to my mom. I'm just going to go count/estimate the family collection, though...

*runs off to the other room*

OH MY GOD.

We have somewhere in the ballpark of 400 VHS and 200 DVDs.

4. Got Netflix (or a similar service)?
Who needs Netflix with our ridiculously gargantuan collection?

5. List five movies you adore (or mean a lot to you.)
1. Amélie
2. L'Auberge Espagnole
3. Tampopo
4. Sliding Doors
5. Original trilogy of Star Wars crammed into one spot?

6. What's in the Netflix queue?
Ha ha. You said queue.

[via Big Stupid Tommy]

srah | 12:21 PM | TrackBack
Tags: memes, movies

Line of information professionals

Ahhh, regalia. The School of Information is "lemon," not to be confused with Science, which is "golden yellow" or Social Work, which is "citron."

I think they ran out of colors.

Anyway, we represented, old-sk00l-style, even though we're something like the third-youngest. So go information professionals - it was your graduation day.

srah | 11:43 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack
Tags: school of information

Unconscious Mutterings

They're free! They're associations! You can read them by clicking below!

srah | 3:35 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Tags: memes, unconscious mutterings

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