I heard this song on the radio the other day and hoped it was some kind of sick joke, all the while knowing that it was serious. This is the kind of "patriotic" garbage that America is listening to.

[article via reenhead]

Blogger, why are you being crap today?

Bob works for Carr Futures, who had an office in the World Trade Center in New York. Now family members of victims are upset with the French-owned company because they won't be getting health insurance. The article says:

In most states, the law only requires that companies whose workers are killed on the job pay life insurance and state-mandated worker's compensation.

A Carr spokesperson said what the company may be lacking in health insurance, it is making up for in life-insurance and accidental-death benefits that will range from $125,000 to $800,000 per employee. Cantor, by comparison, is maxing out at $100,000.

Blah blah racism. Blah blah we hate the French. Blah blah. I don't think people should get special benefits for having a family member die on September 11. I think it should be the same as anyone else who died on the job. The loss of a loved one is difficult, whether it happened on September 10 or September 11 and I don't think they should get special treatment. Am I totally off-base here?

Went to Albion to hear James Earl Jones last night. It was like he was Dr. Guenin-Lelle with a much deeper voice, because he seemed to be teaching my Freshman Seminar. His topic was Culture.

PT opened up by saying that James Earl Jones sounded more like he imagined the voice of God than anyone he'd ever heard. I'm sure it's a common belief, but it scared me because it sounded like Uncle Pete had been reading my blog. Albion gave him an honorary Doctorate of Humane Letters before his speech. "When do I get my honorary doctorate?" I asked Alex. "When you are James Earl Jones," he replied. It'll be a long wait.

Dr. Jones started with a story about when he was in a theater production of a play that took place during the French Revolution. The reviewer made an impression on him when she said that they didn't need to put on French accents or look French to be authentic, but they had to do research and know about the culture of Revolutionary France. "Yes," I said, trance-like, "God told me to learn about French culture. Either that or Darth Vader. Either way, I think I had better learn about French culture."

When he started talking about language as a medium for transmitting culture, I decided I was going to marry him. So did Alex. We had planned to race to him, with threats of violence against each other, as soon as he finished speaking, but he was whisked away at the end. Poo.

He talked about cultural norms and misunderstandings between cultures, including linguistic ones. He told a story about missionaries trying to convert the Inuit people and trying to translate religious concepts into their language. Salvation was translated as "to pull someone from a hole in the ice". They couldn't see what this had to do with religion. The 23rd Psalm ("The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want...") was translated as "The Lord is my keeper, he does not want me. He shoots me down on the beach and pushes me into the water..." Heh heh. Bet Christianity caught on fast there.

I didn't agree with everything he said, but I thought it was a good speech because it made people think and discuss. That's always good.

He answered questions afterwards. I was shocked that some people asked him where he lived and other personal questions. There was, of course, one Star Wars question. He claimed not to remember any of the Darth Vader dialogue and said that to him, David Prowse was Vader and he himself was just a special effect, like a steam machine making the steam rising off a pile of manure.

How poetic.

The radio keeps getting my hopes up, talking about the impending possibility of a baseball strike. They keep saying that baseball may be finished. Unfortunately, they probably only mean for the season. Ah, the nation's beloved pasttime. Why doesn't it just die? Then we could have something worthwhile on TV.

Maybe this is a local thing - maybe my love for baseball comes from the local team being the Detroit Tigers.

Does anyone like baseball anymore?

I have an appointment next Tuesday about my allergies. Every time I go to our stinking doctor's office, I have a different person. This time, her name is Amby. I don't like her already, because when I think of the name "Amby", the following things come to mind:

1. What's your favorite piece of clothing that you currently own?
I like my stripey blue knee socks (which I am wearing right now) and my soft grey argyle socks. I also like my skirt that looks like a bell. I go "ding-dong" whenever I wear it. Then Alex asks me "What's brown and sounds like a bell?"

2. What piece of clothing do you most want to acquire?
I guess I would like some grey pants or some new black pants. There isn't anything I've particularly been lusting over.

3. What piece of clothing can you not bring yourself to get rid of? Why?
There are a lot of t-shirts that have sentimental value... like my Library of the Year 1997 t-shirt from the AADL or the enormous free t-shirt I got when Kurt was on Jeopardy!.

4. What piece of clothing do you look your best in?
My mummy says I look good in red. My Pato likes me in skirts.

5. What has been your biggest fashion accident?
I used to wear really big, baggy t-shirts. Like, size large on a 13-year-old srah. Then, of course, there was the phase in 5th grade where Jenny Poor and I would try to wear our clothes backwards, inside-out, or upside down. Yeah... we were cool.

My Pato tried out for Chekov's The Seagull on Monday and found out today that he's been cast as Medvedenko. Time for srah to do some quick Chekov-research. The character description says:

Semyon Semyonovich Medvedenko - Medvedenko is a local schoolteacher who is poor and must support his family at home while later supporting his new family with Masha. He is a boring conversationalist because he spends most of his time complaining about his poverty. Medvedenko pursues the melancholy Masha, eventually winning her hand in marriage, out of convenience and a hope of change, not love.

It appears that there is no Fnac in Vichy. No Fnac in Vichy, in Cusset, in Bellerive-sur-Allier. From what I can tell, the nearest one is in Clermont-Ferrand. This will be sad for me, or it may be a good thing. Fnac-addict that I am, I don't know what I'll do with my free time, if not browsing at the Fnac. But at least I'll save money if I'm not impulse-buying Jacques Higelin CDs *shudder*.

If anyone is interested, I saw in the Free Press that Tamara Bedricky is going to be at Arts, Beats, and Eats. Looking at the online schedule, I see that Wally Pleasant will be there, too. Not that I am interested in either of them, but isn't it my duty to keep you people informed?

I dreamt last night, in my allergy-drug-crazed sleep, that I was about to go to France when the Euro-dollar conversion was suddenly thrown off so that it took 20 dollars to get one Euro. That would not be fun.

Onesome. Double. If you could have a clone of yourself, what thing would you most want that clone to do so you don't have to?
Go to work today. My clone would be here and I would be home in bed.

Twosome. Bubble. Anyone you know live life in a bubble? Who? And do you wish they'd snap back to reality?
Well, there's the Albion Bubble. My mother always lamented that I never knew what was going on in the world because we were sometimes cut off from news or just didn't pay attention.

Threesome. Bubblegum. Willy Wonka talks about chewing gum to be a nasty habit. What's your worst habit? Do you wish you could give it up?
My worst habit is not thinking before I speak. I used to be a lot better than that, but when I got done thinking, the conversation had moved on, so I never said anything. Now I just spit things out for the sake of talking and sometimes wish I hadn't.

My dad doesn't have allergy problems. My mom has prescription medicine for it. So whose medicine did I end up taking last night? The dog's. The dog takes people-medicine, so it's not quite as strange as all that, but I feel funny taking medicine that was bought for the dog.

Yay! Nikki's gone. That's good. It was sad when she was forced to embarass herself on national television week after week. America has finally shown some mercy and let her go home. Now we'll have some real competition. Justin can sing, even if he looks like broccoli and acts like (to quote a Detroit morning radio show) Wayne-Newton-in-training.

I have a Weather Pixie now. Did you see her? She shows the temperature and weather conditions and changes her clothes depending on the weather. Sometimes a little dog or cat appears in the window with her. It's a fun little gadget... and when I'm teaching in Cusset, I'll set it to show the Vichy weather so you know what I'm up against.

What are some of the domains you admire? why?
I admire not.so.soft because there are so many sections, but they're nicely organized and easy to navigate. Xkot for the same reasons. That's what I like in a website. JohnHannah.net is also pretty well-organized. Good job to that srah person.

How long have you been webdesigning? what is your favorite html/cgi/php/etc. script? if you dont webdesign would you ever want to learn?
Yergh. Webdesigning? Is that what I do? You make it sound so fancy. I like alt tags and title tags - little hidden notes that people might only see if they're looking for them.

What graphic programs do you use? do you get the effect that you want?
I have MS Paint on my computer. That's as good as it gets. But I lurve Photoshop. I use it whenever I have the chance.

Describe a recent dream.
Now that I have the South Pacific soundtrack in my alarm clock, I want to have a South Pacific dream, but I haven't yet.

The students have returned. Already I hate them.

Ann Arbor has a delightful love-hate relationship with the U-M. Lots of us work for the university or are alumni, but the prevailing attitude seems to be that it would be a much better school if they didn't allow any students in it.

Yesterday was move-in day. Unfortunately, it was also the day we had to go to Bed, Bath and Beyond to exchange Becky's damaged lamp. As we pushed our way through the crowded store, full of dopey parents and their equally dopey offspring, I behaved as a true Annarborite, muttering curses at them under my breath. "Go home," I said to Annoying Woman Running Into People With Cart. "Go home," I said, to Father Blocking Aisle While Talking On Cell Phone. "Go home," I said to Ditzy Incoming Freshman In Capri Pants. "Go home," I said to Car In Parking Lot With Ohio Bicentennial License Plate.

If I go to graduate school at U-M, I will be sure to tell myself to go home, too.

We are going to see James Earl Jones tomorrow night at Albion. My mother says he sounds like God, although I don't know how she knows that.

Those lucky Albion students. They don't know how good they have it, with their James Earl Jones on campus and their Baldwin food cooked for them. Why, when they're old like me and have to worry about feeding themselves, they'll wish they were back at Albion, with their Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. and their free Internet access. I don't know where I'm going with this. It was supposed to sound old and crotchety.

Anyway, the whole reason I brought this up - to return from a long tangent - was this. How did whiny, high-pitched Anakin "I wanna be the most powerful Jedi" Skywalker, father of whiny, high-pitched Luke "But I wanted to go to the Taaaaaaaashi station and pick up some powwwwwer converrrrrrrters" Skywalker, get this great James Earl Jones voice? It must be the helmet. I want a helmet like that.

Last night's post reminded me about one of my most annoying (to myself) habits. Sometimes I change the words to a song, either by accident or just as a joke, and then that version forever sticks in my head. The example I'm thinking of right now is Yankee Doodle, where the lyrics to the second verse, to me, will always be:

"Father and I went down to camp along with Captain Stubing,
And there we bought three hundred fifty feet of copper tubing."

Aaaaah. Now I am going to have that in my head for the rest of the day. Thanks, self.

I am snotty today, in more ways than my usual one. Ew. Like you needed to know that. Like my future self, wishing to know what I was like in 2002, needed to know that. Why am I still writing?

It keeps coming and coming. We should attack Iraq. We should do it now. We shouldn't wait for support. Who cares if no one else agrees. We're America. We'll whup 'em like Daddy did and be out by Christmas. Etcetera etcetera etcetera.

I think we're setting ourselves up for even bigger trouble. Instead of learning from September 11, we're making the same mistakes and worse ones on top of them. I'm glad I'll be out of the country, but I wish I could take the rest of you with me. Be safe while I'm gone, you guys.

I forgot to watch American Idol last night. Shame on me. Or perhaps... just the opposite.

I was reading through old letters I had typed up on the computer. It's the closest thing I have to a journal from that time. They are just as boring and pointless as my blog. Let's clip out some of the fun lines and see what I was up to four years ago...

June 7, 1998

Humanities Graduation: Dan Zaret did our speech. Actually, he sang a song. It was about how he had the Leaving Humanities Blues or something. Like:
“We all should have gotten A’s in Vogel’s class,
but we didn’t, because he’s got a stick up his --- Jon Wenk, did you write this?”

and

“Mr. Wolff has a really strong larynx
But we wish he’d stop bitching about his parents.”

August 22, 1998

I think I have a headache, but I'm not sure. It doesn't feel like it's my head.

SLeicher has a roommate with a self-esteem problem. I don't know the details. "I like to get to know people, but they don't like to know me" or something like that. Oh boy!

At the Io, I saw several of the guys I'd seen earlier…Doogie Howser; the Mysterious Kurt, who I've seen somewhere before but I don't know where; Lewis, who Doogie and a yucky guy named Tom (Jim?) had to pick up during one of our activities; Carl, my RA, who is cute in a red-headed sort of way; The Guy in the Orange Shirt; The Guy in the Green Shirt [Neither is related to The Man in the Iron Mask]; Rusty-with-the-interesting-socks-who-isn't-at-all-attractive-but-I-am-attracted-to-his-socks; and of course, the beauteous David C0mfort Look-Alike.

I need to bring a stepstool. This room is teeming with short people (2).

So we had this thing last night called Playfair where we played all these getting-to-know-as-many-people-as-you-can-in-as-short-a-time-as-you-can games. I'm sure you're looking forward to these sorts of things. So I came in with Stephanie and they divided all the people into two lines, but we ended up right next to each other in the same line. Then the lines went running and snaking all around the gym. Then we sat down and played games where you talked to the two people closest to you…Stephanie and some girl I forgot. Then they had us divide up by birth month. Stephanie and I were still together. We were together, like the whole night and completely missed the point: "you won't stay with the people you came in with." I kept trying to get into groups with the guy in the green shirt, but it was not to be. [Hi, this is 2002 srah popping in for a moment here... I have no idea who the guy in the green shirt is. Wish I did.] My favorite game was when he had our 12-person groups break into 3s where the 3s had never met before today. I was with Doogie Howser (whose name is Ian, but it doesn't matter because he looks like DH) and that Tom/Jim guy. I think it's Tom. I'm almost positive. I must've met someone else named Jim. I'm so confused. Anyway, so these groups of 3 were a submarine, sailing ship, and ocean liner. I was the sailing ship. Each ship had to take turns being the Admiral. The Admiral sent his/her 2 first mates out to do things to make people smile. Tom/Jim liked to have us pick people up. DH went first and had no idea what he was doing. I made them give people hi-fives and shake hands and pat people on the head. It was fun. Even when I had to pat tall people on the head and give complete strangers back rubs.

August 23, 1998

Every time I wash my hands, I remember Mr. Van talking about how people get sick a lot in college and how when you wash your hands, you should wash long enough to sing "Yankee Doodle." EVERY TIME. Every time I wash my hands, I get Yankee Doodle in my head. Help me God.

So far, it's been really boring. I actually put all the transactions in my checkbook into Microsoft Money today, just to have something to do. I also alphabetized my reference books, then reordered them in terms of usefulness, and put my books in chronological order by when my first class is, then each book in a class in alphabetical order. Isn't this fascinating?

I just want to go to sleep. But I can't sleep, because it's too hot. AAAAAAAAAAAAH! I gotta find a nice big refrigerator to sleep in. Or go down to the basement "The Pit" where it's cool(er) and sleep with a football player. Or not.

Anyway, French or Foe? is really cool. It's about how the French are different culturally - like French people don't smile unless they have a reason to smile. They don't just smile at you on the street or if they're selling you something like Americans do. We read about smiling so far. French people find it hard to go back to France from the U.S. because it just feels less friendly and open. If you go around smiling at French people in France, they think you're retarded. I love this book!

My Anthropology professor smiles a lot. She smiles all hour. All I could think about was how French people would think she was retarded. Ha ha! But I like her.

I have suddenly come down with a case of allergies or something. It's probably West Nile Disease. Oh well. Bye.

I fully support our president's idea to go to war with Iraq. I am behind him 100% on that. Go ahead, Señor Arbusto. It's a good idea. I'll make you a special jacket with a bullseye on the back.

But don't get lonely, now, because what I don't support is you taking anyone with you. If you want to declare war, go ahead. But you'd better get Congress' permission before you declare that the United States are at war with Iraq. Otherwise, that's not how the United States works and we will have to overthrow your dictatorship. Bye.

I have changed my morning wake-up CD, but thankfully I didn't have dreams about World War II or French Polynesian plantation owners.

I dreamt that Alex was still living with Rob, but there was some kind of problem between the two of them. Rather than talking it out, Alex was going to kill Rob. He was going to chloroform him first, because Rob is too big for him to kill straight out. He had it all planned out, but then Rob came in a different door. So they ended up having to talk it out, after all. I think Alex was a little disappointed.

So, what kind of free stuff and discounts can one get on one's birthday? Hurry up and tell me!

1. What do you do to make things better when you feel sad and/or lonely?
Cry. Oh wait, I do that all the time. That doesn't sound good, does it? I mean that I cry to relieve stress or tension or get attention.

2. Are you a "touchy-feely" person? That is, do you like to touch people you don't know that well? And on the flipside of that, do you like being touched by someone you aren't close with?
I didn't like to be touched in high school. Hugging freaked me out. Then when I got to college and didn't have my family for physical contact, I got really huggy. Now I think I've sort of normalized and reached an equilibrium. Not excessively huggy, but neither am I excessively standoffish. I need to work on my personal space bubble when I get to France, though. The kissing thing weirds me out for a while when I arrive.

3. Do you like to have "me" time, time to yourself to be alone and relax? Or do you prefer to just do your own thing with someone else in the room? When was the last "me" time you got and what did you do?
I love "me" time. I have it all the time. Constantly. Without end. Why are you bothering me?

4. Generally speaking, how do you feel about the concept of marriage? Are you the marrying type? Do you think the act of getting married means something today or is it simply just "a piece of paper?"
I would like to get married someday, I guess. It legalizes a commitment.

5. That said, as many as 25 states have passed legislation regulating who they believe should be the "marrying type." What are your thoughts on the banning of same-sex marriages?
It shouldn't be done. Same-sex partners should be able to legalize their commitment just like heterosexual couples.

6. If there was one law you had the ability to create or change, what would it be?
I would make it illegal for the president to declare war without Congress' approval. Oh wait...

7. What would you like someone visiting your Blog for the first time to know about you? Now is your chance!
It's my birthday!

BONUS: Can you hear them?
I can. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalf, they are calling.

I got a birthday package this weekend from a friend I haven't seen in a year and a half and haven't communicated with for a year. She sent me a letter along with it, so now I'll be writing her back and letting her know what I've been up to for the past year-to-year-and-a-half.

I have no idea what to say.

A year is a long time to catch up on. So many things have happened since the last time we were in touch. I think it would be mean to send her the blog URL and make her read my archives. Tempting, but mean.

How would you summarize the past year of your life?

I brought up tuna fish in my last post because I'm hungry and looking forward to lunch because my mom made me a tuna salad sandwich. Her tuna salad has tuna, mayonnaise, and raw peas and carrots. I love it.

What do you like in your tuna salad?

Although I don't eat a lot of meat, every once in a while, I crave a big hunk of steak. I'm not very good at giving things up for moral reasons, either. I once tried to give up tuna fish because I heard that the tuna population was being depleted because they had to be older than other fish to reproduce and we were picking them out of the sea before they had a chance. That didn't last too long. I like tuna fish too much.

My paternal grandmother was a vegetarian, as were her ancestors, going back to the 1840s. It's my generation and the one before me who have dropped the custom. That's my family for you - we always want to be going against the normal trends. We were vegetarians when it wasn't popular and started eating meat just when everyone was becoming a vegetarian.

No one outside the Albion community will care about any of this, but here is the latest news I picked up while I was there:

Vera Wenzel is working at a Catholic university in Minnesota. Dr. Wenzel is staying at Albion until he retires. I paid $6 to eat lunch in Baldwin. What did I eat? An egg salad sandwich and salad. They didn't even have vinegar and oil for the salad. I saw two Stempkis walking down the street as I drove out of town. Apparently they weren't kicked out - just off-campus. Larry Lloyd, rather than running for public office, has joined the Army. WHA--? Susan Laing is an RD. Dan Westerhof's hair is even bigger than last time I saw him.

I forgot it was my birthday today until my mom wished me a happy birthday this morning. So there. Please forgive me all of the birthdays I've forgotten, because I've also forgotten my own.

I am 22 today and - before you ask - no, it does not feel any different. Which is why I didn't realize it was my birthday.

Upon their arrival in the U.S., Albion's new native speakers and international students were taken on a tour of Albion, which included passing the Bohm Theatre. Imagine their surprise when they saw XXX plastered on the marquee. So..., they thought, Albion only has one theatre, and that's a porn theatre. Fortunately, we have rectified the situation.

1. Sesame Street or Captain Kangaroo?
Sesame Street. If I ever watched Captain Kangaroo, I don't remember it. I sense I will be a bit young for all of these questions.

2. Muppet Show or Fraggle Rock?
Muppet Show (sorry, Jillian)

3. He-Man or Jem?
I watched neither, but I suppose I would have watched Jem if I watched one or the other.

4. The Smurfs or Muppet Babies?
I've never thought much of The Smurfs, but they are Belgian. Muppet Babies really scared me whenever they opened the closet and there was live-action stuff in there. But we did a Muppet Babies play in third grade. I'm conflicted on this one.

5. Archie or Josie & the Pussycats??
Archie, I guess. We're talking comics, right? There wasn't a cartoon on TV, was there?

6. H.R. Pufnstuf or The Banana Splits?
Wha--?

7. The Partridge Family or The Brady Bunch ?
The Brady Bunch. Especially the 1990s movies making fun of them.

8. Happy Days or Welcome Back Kotter?
I've never seen Welcome Back, Kotter, but Happy Days has Winthrop Opie in it.

9. Punky Brewster or Small Wonder?
They were from my time period, but I never watched either. I lie. I think I saw the credits for Small Wonder and they had a screwdriver in her back. Creepy. So we'll go with Punky, although I don't really want to.

10. The Facts of Life or Silver Spoons?
Huh?

I've noticed a lot of people don't use the words that Chris provided on their webpage. So this week at least, I'll do that. If you want to know the answers, mouse-over the text or click on the Op-Ed graphic to visit the site.

1. What have I never donated, because I'm too small, because I've spent time à l'étranger and because I'm scaaaaaaared?

2. What was everyone covered in after moving Becky in on Friday?

3. What salty liquid do I exude far more often than I'd like?

I was at Meijers yesterday and a mother was yelling at her kid. Apparently, the kid was called Simeon, but my first thought when she called him was that she was calling him a simian. Simeon is a good name on paper, but I don't think I would like to be mistaken for a monkey.

My sister is one of three Rebecca/Rebekahs on her hall. The other two are Beckys. She doesn't think much of going by Alfie. It will be interesting to see what she comes up with.

I was amazed, when I was back at Albion yesterday, how many people recognized me. There were people whose names I didn't even know, who knew who I was and that I had graduated in May.

The flipside of that was that there were people I used to talk to quite frequently who didn't realize that I'd graduated. I was quite surprised, as well, to learn how many people didn't know what I am doing this year. Sometimes I feel like I am forever repeating myself on that subject.

One of my favorite professors from Albion is doing a First Year Seminar this fall called "Chance". When told this, I heard that he was doing a class called "Chants" and couldn't figure out what that had to do with math or computer science. On the way home, we were speculating about the Chants class. My favorite part was paying $50 for a great big thick textbook so the students could go "Pie jesu domine, dona eis requiem - THUNK!"

I kept running into Saaataaan today. This is my new name for the RAbid Bitch, since she is no longer my RA. At least I've adjusted to that.

Being back on Albion's campus after I graduated is weird for me. I was hanging out with my old friends, but I was the only one who didn't have a dorm room to arrange, or upcoming classes to talk about. I was getting upset about the new I-House parking lot even though I don't live there anymore and it will probably never affect me. With Alex and Becky still there, I still feel a close tie to the campus, even though I know I should probably be distancing myself. I'm so confused.

We've been moving Becky into Albion today, hence no updates. Hopefully now that she's in a room with 24/7 Internet access, she will update her blog from time to time. Congrats, Becky, and welcome to the #7 Most Wired College in the Country. Bleurgh.

1. What is your current occupation? Is this what you chose to be doing at this point in your life? Why or why not?
I am a student assistant in a historical library. No no no no no no no. And no. No no no. I never had any desire to work in anything related to archives.

2. If time/talent/money were no object, what would your dream occupation be?
Half-time Director of International Education, half-time web designer.

3. What did/do your parents do for a living? Has this had any influence on your career choices?
They are both archivists. They got me interested in libraries, but sure that I never wanted to work in archives.

4. Have you ever had to choose between having a career and having a family?
No.

5. In your opinion, what is the easiest job in the world? What is the hardest? Why?
The easiest is doing something that you love to do. The hardest is doing something you're morally conflicted about. I can't think of specific professions that would be the easiest or hardest, because that depends on the abilities of the person doing them.

1. ř
2. á
3. í
4. Slavonic Dances

Why don't I have accents in my name? From now on, you may address me as şřåħ.

Have you noticed that sometimes when you mouse-over my links (IE only), there's a caption that pops out? Well, there is. I learned how to do that from Meg's site.

I went to Borders yesterday and they had an enormous display of 2003 calendars. I could see academic calendars now, but if I bought a 2003 calendar in August 2002, I would lose it by 2003. Maybe that's their fiendish plan.

This comes out in the US two days after I leave. This comes out in France two weeks before I get there and may be gone by the 19th.

Poop. I want them both.

This cute thing has been mine for 11 months. Lucky me.

I would like to have site skins. That would be fun, but beyond my own talents. Do you have to have Movable Type to do that? I love Blogger, but having skins and my comments saved into my page is very tempting.

Onesome. Small. Is it a small world? In how many miles of space do you live your life?
My life... hmm. When I was at Albion, it was about 60 miles. When I'm in Ann Arbor, more like 30 (or however many it takes to get to Alex). Next year, do I count 4000? I won't be travelling those 4000 miles often, but parts of me will still be over here.

Twosome. Spiral. Ever felt as if you were on a downward spiral? How did you pull out of it?
I don't think so. Sometimes when the work piled up at school, I thought I would never finish it. And I was having anxiety attacks a few weeks ago. I just had to put my affairs in order and plan out everything there was to be done, in what order.

Threesome. Notebook. Notebooks and pens and crayons and glue...when you think about school supplies, what do you most remember?
Free crayons in elementary school. I would bring the crayons from the previous year in order to avoid using the fresh, sharp ones that the school gave me.

Wait, when did I start wearing skirts all the time? What a weird summer.

As soon as I feel comfortable enough in my finances to shell out the cash, I shall be moving to a new host and getting a domain name. You may have been following this drama for months.

It seems like such a commitment, choosing a domain name. I don't want to be constantly changing and sending my readers different places, but I can't seem to settle on anything. I feel like as soon as I reserve one, I'll come up with something better. So I'm not going to share the rather boring one I'm thinking of with you until I've already paid. Sorry.

What do you think it should be?

I dreamt last night that this guy from my high school, Eric Bodley, was 6'8" and had built a big maze at Albion, full of mirrors and magic doors and masking tape. It was a spectacular creation. My sister and James Davidson were trying to go through it at the same time and were doing pretty well. Once you got through the mirrors, you got to the doors section. You had to do certain things to get the doors to open. At door #1, you had to do something (I was watching from the viewing area, so I couldn't see exactly what), then suddenly the ground under your feet and the door would raise up several feet and the door would open. They went on and on like that until they got to door #6. There were about four doors marked with 6s, and you had to figure out which was the right one and how to open it. Finally, they gave up and I ran down and tried. One of them was made out of aluminum foil and masking tape, so I just broke through it and looked at Eric like "Was that the right way to do it?" Apparently it wasn't.

Study explains why your family stinks

Why do I watch this show? Why do I suffer through it when it's so obviously fixed? Why do I keep putting myself through the torture, week after week, that is listening to Nikki sing?

Sometimes I wish that phones were like intercoms and that while they were ringing, you could scream out "I KNOW YOU'RE HOME, SO PICK UP THE DAMNED PHONE." That's the advantage that answering machines have over voice mail.

I've been doing a project at work where I have to go through necrology files. One amused me because an obituary ended with this sentence:

"Remains cremated."

I giggled to myself when I read it. He isn't going to de-cremate, now is he?

I have drowned myself, attempting to drink from the drinking fountain. I had it set to the right height, then when I leaned, my hand leaned with me and turned it up. I can feel the water seeping around my respiratory system. I don't expect myself to live much longer. Goodbye, cruel world.

What do you see yourself doing 10 years from now?
Oh, for heaven's sake. I don't know what I'm doing next year, much less when I'm - dear god - thirty-two. I guess I'll be working in an International Education office somewhere. Sure, we'll say that.

If you could do anything that you wanted, what would it be?
Work half-time with international people, build websites half-time, and make enough money to travel extensively during my vacations.

Where in your life do you wish to be a year from now?
Shoot. See question #1. A year from now, I hope to be preparing for graduate school...

Describe a recent dream.
Too late. Already did.

Our refrigerator died yesterday. The new one should be delivered tomorrow. I wasn't sure if it was just the freezer or the whole refrigerator that died.

"Can I get things out of the refrigerator?" I asked my mommy.

"Sure," she replied. I began heading towards the fridge. "They just won't be any good."

Well, that's helpful. :)

I really need to change the CD in my alarm clock.

I dreamt that I was at work. I got a package from a friend in the JHAC, but the box had Karen's name on it. Apparently she had sent something to my friend and my friend had reused the box. I think the dream was reminding me to send my tape chains to her.

I walked past Tom, who was singing songs from The Music Man (hence my need to change my wake-up music). He knew all of the words and I could barely sing along.

I went into the back, which was the new addition to the library that hasn't been built yet. Jim's latest conservation volunteer was using the phone and her husband came in. They were from the Philippines.

Suddenly I was outside in a group of about fifty people. They were playing this game where you threw a ball to one person and they threw the ball to someone else. No winners, no point to it at all. My kind of game, but I wasn't planning on playing. I was just sort of trapped in the middle of the game while I was walking through. I saw Becky there, then Ben from work threw the ball to me and I said, "Aw crap." I threw the ball to my sister's ex-friend Halley and saw Doris from work in the background.

There are some "anti-American" elements to an upcoming French film about September 11. I thought the USA was a happy fairyland and never did anything wrong. What a shock. I must go lie down now.

After years of being a burden on her family, Alfie has finally passed her road test and can get her driver's license.

1. CandyLand or Chutes and Ladders?
Yechhh... Candyland, I guess. We didn't have Chutes & Ladders when I was growing up.

2. Barbie or GI Joe?
Neither. Barbie, if pressed to answer with one or the other. War is bad.

3. Play-Doh or Silly Putty?
Play-Doh. Silly Putty is fun for about five minutes.

4. Lincoln Logs or Tinkertoys?
Lincoln Logs! I had lots of fun with those, but I don't think I ever had Tinkertoys.

5. The Game of Life or Monopoly?
I hate them both so much. At least with Life you can fill your car up with kids and same-sex partners and have interesting life experiences. Oh, and that game, unlike Monopoly, eventually ends.

6. Etch-a-Sketch or Lite-Brite?
Lite-Brite. I don't have the coordination for an Etch-a-Sketch.

7. The Slinky: metal or plastic?
If I'm going to smack myself in the head with something, it had better be plastic.

8. Easy-Bake Oven or Sno-Cone Machine?
I never had an Easy-Bake Oven, but I like baking better than using arm muscles to grind ice.

9. Hot Wheels or Matchbox cars?
I thought they were the same thing. No preference.

10. Spirograph or Paint-by-Numbers?
Paint-by-Numbers?! That sucks. Spirograph anyday.

I dreamt I was in an English mining town where a strike was going on. The striking miners were going to sneak into the mine area and do some kind of violence. A truck drove to the beach behind the mine, carrying old-fashioned beach cabanas - the kind that people would change their clothes in in Victorian times, the kind that The Sims have in Hot Date. There were only four cabanas, but miners started pouring out of them like clowns out of a clown car. They were a bit like clowns, too, in the way they were dressed. They were all wearing old-fashioned bathing costumes. Where do striking miners have the money to buy old-fashioned bathing costumes and cabanas?

We landed on the beach, then climbed up the hill to get to the mine. "Which way are we going?" someone asked me. "Same way they are," I pointed, quoting Ringo Starr in a Liverpudlian accent, "oop!" I don't know if Ringo has actually ever said that in any of the Beatles movies or if that was just for the dream.

Then I was in a dingy, horrible hotel room with another of the assistantes from my region. For some reason, we were both trying to take a shower at the same time. She kept trying to make passes at me, but luckily it was a big shower, so I would just run to the other end. We got out and she became CKane, who was looking at maps and telling me she would buy me the CD of the song she had in her head.

What is a fille de joie exactly? Is it a prostitute, or is it something more subtle than that? It's these subtleties that I don't understand in the language.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

One of my Where's George bills has turned up in Maine!

1. Many children have blankets, or a favorite nubby stuffed animal that they like to keep near them for security. Do you recall what you had for your "security blanket" as a child? When did you finally give it up? What brought that about?
I don't remember a blanket or stuffed animal, but I had my "binky", or pacifier (I think the nickname comes from the brand of pacifier we bought). I believe I gave it up when it developed a crack and started biting my tongue.

2. Now that you are a big kid, what do you have to give you that same sense of security?
Tea. Lots and lots of it.

3. With a little over four months left in 2002, have you accomplished everything you wanted to for the year? Is there anything that you would like to accomplish before the year is over?
I have a job. I think that's all I really cared about. I suppose I would have liked to have more direction to my life, but tant pis.

4. I don't know about you, but it seems to me children have it pretty good these days. Game systems, computers in the home, microwaves, cable TV, the internet, cell phones and pagers, they certainly have a wider variety of technology than most of us did as children. What modern convenience, if any, do you think it would be good for children today to do without? What would they gain?
TV dinner tray tables and cell phones.
Cell phones because parents don't have that in-between contact so that they know who their children's friends are. Parents aren't involved these days. They're so busy with their own lives or afraid of smothering their children that they don't pay enough attention to them.
TV tray tables because people need to eat at the dinner table. My family doesn't have trays but we eat in front of the TV anyway. It's such a struggle now to get us to eat like civilized people.

5. Many of us have one thing in which we believe we excel. What do you do better than most?
Almost everything. Mwah ha. Let's see. I only know two people who can beat me in Trivial Pursuit because my head is full of useless knowledge. I also think that I speak French better than most of the French majors I know (and sometimes better than my professors). I'm a snot.

6. In the United States, and possibly other countries, teenagers in High School usually wind up falling into several social circles or "cliques." Stoners, Rich Kids, Jocks, Cheerleaders, Band, Drama, Goths, and so on (though the names are probably different today). What High School "clique" did you find yourself in? Was it by choice or did it just happen? Did you look down on other groups? (Aw it's ok, it was/is High School, we all did dumb stuff)
I guess I was a nerd. But high school, for me, anyway, wasn't anything like on TV. The cliques weren't clearly defined. There were people who branched the cliques and it wasn't like you couldn't talk to anyone in another clique. I was brainy, but there were people worse off than me, socially.

7. (it begins) I have great news! I won the contest and we now have plane tickets to anywhere in the world. The bad news is we have to pick a place now and leave in the morning. I can't decide where to go, so you get to pick. Where should we go, and what is the first thing we should do when we get there?
I already have tickets for France, so we'll have to go somewhere else. It's getting towards springtime at Macchu Picchu...

BONUS: Must I beg you?
No, you must beg Alf. Bow down before him.

7 days until my birthday. (I didn't realize it was so soon!)
7 days until the French school officials get back from vacation and reply to my letter.
10 days left at work.
30 days until I leave for France.

So much to do.

What odd topics for the Sunday Op-Ed. It seems like I've already talked about all of them in the past week. Guess I'll have to find something else to say about them.

1. Elementary School
Where was I at the top of the heap academically... and excessively, embarassingly proud of it?

2. High School
Where did I think I was happy... until I started looking back on it and became quite glad I wasn't there anymore?

3. College
Where was I happy to finally find people who were in school for a reason, and not just because they were legally required to be?

Ann Arbor sucks.

I saw Signs this weekend. It was very good, but I think I should have waited until it came out on video. Spending $8 (or having your boyfriend spend $8) for you to close your eyes and curl up into a frightened little foetal ball is not an efficient use of money. It scared me. It scared me. It scared me. I was shaking after I left. I still liked it and thought it was a good movie, but if you're going to see it, don't see it at night.

Or just be braver than me, which is not difficult.

I'm a little confused by the fact that Alfie, Pato, and Jillian are going back to Albion at the end of this month. If they're all going back, why aren't I?

It's weird to be a "grown-up". I don't have that built-in school-year schedule that my brain is used to. Luckily I'll still be in the educational system, in some capacity, for a while now. How will I ever adapt out of it completely?

Will you go, or have you gone to your high school reunion? I got a thingy in the mail about a week ago, asking what kind of 5-year reunion we should have. Hmm, good question. How about an imaginary one?

When I see people I went to high school with, I walk quickly in the other direction and hope they didn't see me. Why would I inflict hundreds of high school people on myself? Is there anyone from high school I would want to see? If I could come up with anyone, I would contact them myself.

When I was in high school, I thought it was weird that my mom never wanted to go to her high school reunions. I thought that my high school friends would be my friends for life. Some of them are, but most of them aren't.

So I don't believe I shall be at the Huron High School class of 1998 reunion next year. Sorry. If you really wanted to see me, you can find me yourself.

Alex's host mom is moving into a new house and they don't have a phone yet. Even though I hate talking on the phone, I don't think I could live without one. I would feel too disconnected from the rest of the world.

I'm sure I've written this exact post before, but I hate working in the sorting room. There are never enough computers to go around and when I tie one up for the whole day, typing up negative sleeve after negative sleeve, I can feel the laser-eyes of the other sorting room inhabitants burning into the back of my skull. They want me to leave. They will kill me for my computer. If I stand up, they will steal it away from me and close all of my applications. They hate me.

I feel unwelcome. It's not a pleasant working environment.

In the spirit of Krista, I will tell you about the book I just finished. It was The Red Tent, by Anita Diamant. Like a fool, here I am reading bestsellers before I go to France. The only English books you can find in France (if you're lucky) are classics and bestsellers. That's probably the only reason I read things like About a Boy and Bridget Jones's Diary before I saw the movies. Tangent.

Anyway, I thought it was a pretty good book. It was a fictional retelling of the biblical story of Dinah, told from her point of view. I suppose you would have to know the background stories to really enjoy it.

My only real complaint was that it started off slow, and therefore was a bit difficult to get into. At the beginning of the book, I thought she was never going to talk about anything besides menstruation and having sex with sheep.

Well, if that doesn't pique your interest (and get me strange search requests), what will?

If you have a blog, check out this blog directory: Eatonweb Portal.

Last night, Robin and I were looking through old elementary and middle school yearbooks. Robin knows what everyone's doing these days. I don't know how. We looked at the Mitchell Elementary School graduating class of 1991 (43 students) and counted at most 9 people among them who had or were working towards a college degree.

Doesn't that seem extraordinarily low? It makes me feel lucky to be where I am. When I was in elementary school, it never occurred to me that these people wouldn't go to college. My parents both have Master's degrees and I just assumed that I would go to college myself. There was never a question about it. And since I was going, I assumed everyone else was going. College was just another automatic step on the educational ladder.

Robin had a story about almost everyone in the class - how they'd gotten into drugs or having babies or worked at Krogers. It's quite disappointing, actually. These people were my friends when I was ten. How did we end up in such different places?

What are your educational origins? Are you where you wanted to be? Are your friends and classmates where you expected them to be?

I can't believe Nikki is still on American Idol. R.J. sucks, but nothing like the heavy duty professional-strength vacuum of talent that is Nikki.

Did you know that you can get 10,000 United Mileage Plus miles for gradutating?

We wants 'em.

My Pato is on his way back to me. Everyone wish him a safe voyage!

When you're writing in HTML, how do you pronounce a href in your head? Is it "ay aitch are ee eff"? "Ay huh-REFF"? Or do you not pronounce it at all? Am I just a nerd?

My answer is the second one, by the way. If you cared.

Do you speak more than one language? Actually, I suppose this could affect anyone.

This morning, I listened to music in Bulgarian, Japanese and Flemish. I found myself picking up familiar sounds and making French, Spanish, or English words out of them so that I could try to understand the song. What's up with that?

Sometimes it would be nice to be able to éteindre parts of your brain. Like, for example, the part that just now could not come up with the English phrase "turn off".

Have you ever played around with Hollywood and real-life connections between celebrities and characters? After writing about Anne of Green Gables this morning, I got to thinking about how, through several connections, you could sort of make her the sister of the ventriloquist's dummy, Charlie McCarthy.

Anyone know how?

I dreamt last night that I was trying to figure out what the Spanish word capa meant. As far as I know, there is no such Spanish word and I wonder if my subconscious was thinking of Capa, which is how my name is written in the Cyrillic alphabet.

According to Meg, the average woman has 25 items in her purse. I've counted items in my backpack before, but now I'm a Grown Up and have to have a purse. It's still enormous and I might as well be carrying a backpack. So let's inventory mine now:

1. Two sets of spare contacts (I didn't know one of them was there until I started inventorying)
2. Two computer disks
3. Three Subway Sub Club cards (full of stamps and waiting for me to go to Subway and redeem them)
4. Various cards tucked into front pocket: library card, video rental cards, gift card to The Gap, etc.
5. Chilean Vitamin C tablets (yum)
6. comb
7. small yellow hair-ties (appropriate for pigtails)
8. five scraps of paper wtih important bits of information scribbled dessus
9. camera
10. extra roll of film
11. planner I hardly ever write in or consult
12. ticket telling me to pick up a registered letter at the Post Office.
13. chapstick (strawberry)
14. change purse
15. checkbook
16. wallet
17. two little notebooks
18. keys (key to keychain ratio - 1:1)
19. three pens

So that's nineteen kinds of things that add up to much more than twenty-five total items. Blargh. No wonder I need such an enormous purse.

1. Dr. Seuss characters: the Cat in the Hat or the Grinch?
The Grinch has Whos, but I think I'll go with The Cat in the Hat. It has my old car's namesake, Roger, whose name is not Roger in the book.

2. "Anne of Green Gables" or "Little Women"?
Anne of Green Gables! Gilbert! Moody Spurgeon MacPherson! Gilbert!

3. Nancy Drew or the Hardy Boys?
I've only read one Hardy Boys book, but I had a sizable collection of Nancy Drews. Besides, I have to go with her for female solidarity or something.

4. Winnie the Pooh characters: Tigger or Eeyore?
Blargh, I hate both of them. Pooh.

5. Which author: Judy Blume or Beverly Cleary?
Judy Blume, I guess. Both are good.

6. Roald Dahl books: "Charlie & the Chocolate Factory" (Willy Wonka) or "James & the Giant Peach"?
Some of the bugs in James & the Giant Peach scare me. The book's always made me a little uncomfortable.

7. "Harry Potter" or "The Wizard of Oz"?
Harry Potter! But if we're talking movies, Wizard of Oz.

8. Curious George or Madeline?
Madeline. She's French. Hee hee.

9. "A Wrinkle in Time" or "Little House on the Prairie"?
That's a toughie. First, I have my usual stupid announcement that Almanzo Wilder is my distant cousin. But I think I might go with A Wrinkle in Time. Actually, if we're talking about those two specific books as opposed to the series, it gets more difficult, because neither is my favorite in their respective series.

10. Dr. Seuss again: "Horton Hears a Who" or "The Lorax"?
The Lorax has a good moral, but Horton has Whos. I like schmall people.

Guess who's coming back on Thursday?!

What if life is one big game of The Sims? At least that would explain why I'm always eating cake off people's lawns and walking into my neighbors' houses to pee in their kitchen.

I don't like peanut butter.

There, I've said it. Twice, in fact.

Why can't I sing?

Yesterday, after a lovely evening of playing with penguins on Becky's delightful new computer, I put on my newly burned copy of my mom's Flower Drum Song CD and started belting out "Grant Avenue" and dancing around the house.

And what was the reaction from the audience my family? They laughed. Not at my ridiculous performance, as I'd intended, but at the atrocious quality of my singing voice. It was very painful.

I was in that half-awake state again this morning, and the soundtrack from The Music Man was playing on my alarm clock.

I dreamt I was in a production of The Music Man, playing a travelling salesman in the opening scene. The cast went to dinner at Mary's Fabulous Chicken and Fish and after dinner, we were standing on the corner of Packard and LaSalle, singing songs from the show (but I think we were dressed in Victorian costumes, for some reason). I was excited because the guy who said "Wheredayagitit?" wasn't there, so when that part came, I jumped in and said it. The other salesmen gathered around and patted me on the back.

I also dreamt that I had an enormous tuft of hair growing between my eyebrows. It was completely separate from, and much longer and bushier than, the eyebrows themselves.

Sometimes I worry that my writing style is going downhill because I blog so informally. I think that people will not respect me if I can't write like a grown-up. Then, I think "What's for supper?".

There's an article about spelling and grammar in the Detroit Free Press today. My favorite part is the quote from a Free Press reader who doesn't think there are any spelling or grammar problems in the paper. I only hope she said this out loud, rather than writing it:

..."It's important to be as correct as possible because we absorb by what we read. So if they read what's incorrectly written, then they believe that's the way it should be," said Carr.

"It seems that our language is getting worse and worse, but that might not be true. But it seems that way. More and more things, like things written on signs, make it seem like we know less about the proper use of our language," she said...

1. If I could guarantee that the Fashion Police would not lay the smackdown on you, which favorite out-of-style article of clothing do you wish you could wear right now? (and if you have photos of you wearing it, post 'em)
I like old-fashioned stuff, so out-of-style clothing sounds good to me. I would wear 1940s rayon dresses and T-strap shoes or saddle shoes and rolled-up jeans. I would be very cute.
Either that, or I could go back to elementary school and wear slouch socks and my coat backwards. *snort*

2. In your opinion, who is famous but shouldn't be?
What a question! Pato and I had this discussion a few weeks ago... If you could kill or remove from show business five people, who would they be? I came up with Britney Spears, Andie MacDowell, Charlton Heston, John Revolta and Tom Cruise.

3. Are there any new movies or TV shows that you are forward to this fall?
Hmm, I can't think MDS of any MDS new shows coming MDS out this fall, so MDS I'm not sure I'm going to MDS be able to answer MDS this question.

4. If you had a time machine that you could use only one time (there and back), where would you go and what would you do?
I'd like to go back and observe myself and see if I like myself better now than in the past. I hope so.

5. What cologne of perfume do you like to wear? Which brand do you prefer that your partner wear?
I wear Arielle by Fragonnard. I don't know any male cologne names or smells, but I would prefer that my partner didn't stink.

6. Do you recall your first "French kiss?" Tell me about how that felt, and how it came about. Do you like them?
It was 1996 and I was getting ready to go to France. I had a party and invited all of my friends over who were going on the trip with me. We watched the movie and liked it very much. Thank you for asking.

7. Excluding your partner...If you had the opportunity, who would you most like to French kiss?
I'm not really coming up with anyone... we'll say Vincent Perez, so it would be a real French kiss... but I don't think I really want to kiss him. I'd say Alan Rickman, but he scares me a little. How dumb is it that I can't think of anyone?

BONUS: Can't you see that it's late at night?
Alf is hugging me to his big furry chest, so everything looks dark to me.

1. Canoe
What is a verb that I have never performed?

2. Books
What do I wish I had more time to read - but when I'm in France I'll have too much time and not enough of them?

3. Vodka
What is something that sounds awfully yucky but I'm pretty sure I've never tasted it?

I saw Austin Powers in Goldmember last night. I was pleasantly surprised. From everything I'd read, it was a big disappointment and was horrible. But it was an entertaining movie and I laughed a lot. There were parts where it dragged and I would have changed things, but they didn't ask me. They were really packing celebrities in at the beginning, and I was afraid the whole movie was going to be like that. I thought Goldmember was a funny evil henchman, but he didn't need a whole plot line. He could have just appeared at the table. And whyyyyyyy was Fat Bastard back? Ew.

But anyway, I was delighted to see Kevvie's Dr Evil. Yum.

I found another site about le lycée Valery Larbaud. Pickshers an' everthing. This one's my favorite.

1. Do you have a car? If so, what kind of car is it?
Sort of. I have a 1987 Honda Civic which has recently become undrivable. So I still physically have it, I'm just not driving it anywhere. I'm not quite sure what to do with it. But our family has a multitude of cars, so there's always something to drive if I can't wangle a ride out of someone.

2. Do you drive very often?
More than I'd like. I can't wait until I'm rich and famous and can pay people to drive me places. Or until I'm in France, where public transportation actually exists.

3. What's your dream car?
I would like something small but sensible (like me). A stick-shift and four doors - something like a little French car or a VW Jetta.

4. Have you ever received a ticket?
I've never even been pulled over. Yay me.

5. Have you ever been in an accident?
I was rear-ended once when I was in high school. I cried. (Surprise!) It smooshed the back of my car enough that it wasn't terribly visible, but the trunk didn't close properly and it disabled my right rear door enough that I tried not to use it. I never got around to getting it fixed because I am LAZY and I DON'T CARE.

I hear rumours that someone has a birthday coming up.

Take a look at my blogging pedigree! Add your own! Unfortunately, I can only clearly remember one parent blog. I feel like blogging just appeared out of the mist and can't remember who inspired me.

(later) Reading that first month's posts, I came up with another one!

My favorite flavor of M&M is almond. What's yours?

milk chocolate | peanut | crispy | almond | peanut butter | dulce de leche

Why does it smell moldy/mildewy in here?

In French (feuilles) and Spanish (hojas), a piece of paper is a "leaf". In English (in the U.S. at least), we have loose-leaf paper, but for the most part, we call individual pieces of paper "sheets". Which is the same word we use for bed-coverings. We're funny like that. I wonder why we don't call them leaves.

If you could be any animal on earth what would you be? why?
I would be a llama. No one ever suspects the llama...

If you could design the perfect animal what would it look like? how would it eat? how would it breath? what would you call it?
I would design an animal with long floppy ears and soft, velvety fur. It would be plaid and eat human-food and stupid people and be independent like a cat, but fly with me on its back if I asked it to. I would call it "Henry".
I've just drawn a picture of Henry. It looks a lot more dog and less llama than I'd intended - but that's my drawing skills for you. In fact, it looks more like a dog than most drawings of dogs that I've done in my life. Maybe I will scan it later and post it for you.

What, if any, animal would you like to demesticate [sic] and keep in your home?
I'm going to say a llama again, because I like the word llama. I think it would be sort of destructive, but I guess that's the point of domestication. Can't you see a nice llama curled up in front of the fire, or licking your face when you come home?

Describe a recent dream.
It doesn't say I have to describe my own dream, so... my mom dreamt last night that she and I were going to the guillotine to be executed. Becky was driving us there in a bus and having problems backing the huge vehicle up. Her godparents were watching and making remarks about her driving abilities and telling her to hurry it up.

Michigan preliminary primary results are in. John Dingell is 76 years old. For heaven's sake. At least he has a comical name.

Would you still be my friend if I told you I've been watching "American Idol"?

Has anyone else been watching? What did Sideshow Bob Justin do two weeks ago that was so bad? I must have the answer.

I like the word "bookkeeper" because it's spelled B-double-O-double-K-double-E-P-E-R. When you spell things with double letters, do you say "T-T" or "double-T"? I say "T-T" in English and "two-Ts" in French.

The word "vacuum" has a "double-U" in it, but no "W". :)

Now that I look at the title, that could be an obituary for the poor departed Timmy from "Passions". But I am not a regular viewer, so it's not.

Instead, this post is about my eyebrows.

My eyebrows are very bushy and scraggly. I look so much better when they're neat. But I am so lazy and averse to pain, that I always put off plucking them for months at a time. It hurts and it takes forever. Yesterday, Robin waxed my eyebrows. It hurt, but I don't think it hurt any more than plucking, and it was over a lot more quickly. I recommend it!

Yesterday it was my turn to sit on the reference desk during tea. ARGH. It's one of my least favorite things to do, because I know even less about reference than many of our researchers.

Yesterday, there was a long line of researchers that only seemed to grow and to have questions I couldn't answer. One was angry because he wanted a photocopy. Others were visiting from New York City and needed information on some exhibit that we didn't have and that I'd never heard of. Others wanted to do research on topics I didn't know anything about.

Even one of the researchers described my calls to the kitchen as "plaintive".

Did you hear about the people who tried to go to Sydney... and ended up in Nova Scotia?

And, hey, someone has a birthday coming up.

Last week when I bought my ticket to France, I asked the travel agent if I could have an e-ticket. I've never had one before, so I thought it would be cool and harder to lose. Unfortunately, they told me that Lufthansa doesn't do e-tickets, and I would have to pick up my paper ticket on Friday.

I forgot on Friday, so I came in on Monday to pick up my ticket. They looked it up in the computer and said apparently I had an e-ticket. All of the other travel agents gathered around and said that they had never heard of Lufthansa offering e-tickets and it must be something they just started.

Great. I should have asked for a paper ticket. At least then you have the impression of something real and concrete and you know you have a ticket. You don't have to live in the fear that you have become a computer glitch.

How disappointing

I am never quite as nerdy as I want to be.

[via Cleo]

1. What's your personal clothing style...trendy or classic?
My style is classic to the point where I don't wear trendy things until they're a couple of years past the current style and have been established as more than a passing fad. I finally own 3/4 length sleeve shirts now and I think I would actually buy some capri pants. I'm such a dork.

2. Do you shop for designer names or stick with the more generic brands?
I don't wear Tommy Hilfiger or something like that, but I do like to wear Levis and I shop at The Gap from time to time. Does that count? If it fits and looks good, I'd be just as happy in a shirt from Meijers as one from The Gap, though.

3. Work clothes: dressy or casual?
They're more casual than I'd sometimes like. Sometimes I get frustrated in the morning because I can't find anything, so I just wear jeans. Also, it's a bit SUPER FREEZING COLD here to wear skirts every day.

4. Days off style: dressy or casual?
Casual to the point of slovenly? Sometimes I have the urge to dress up on the weekends and then I wonder why I couldn't find that outfit during the week.

5. Women: high heels or flats? Men: Wing-tips or work boots?
I think flat dress shoes look dumb unless you're Mary Tyler Moore, but I do like to wear tennis shoes for comfort. I don't like high heels, but when you're as short as I am, it's nice to have a boost of an inch or two.

6. Do you have a large wardrobe, or just a few carefully selected pieces?
I have way more clothes than any normal human being could ever need. Maybe I'm just lazy about doing laundry. I can't wait until I go to France and only have the clothes and possessions that I need. It feels so much healthier than here, where I'm surrounded by stuff.

7. Do you shop for clothing at stores or from catalogs/internet?
Not much, but I probably would. And they probably wouldn't fit. See #9.

8. Are most of your clothes dry-clean only or machine-washable?
Machine-washable. Even if they're dry-clean only, I usually try to wash them. Sometimes they survive.

9. You buy an article of clothing and realize it is all wrong for you when you get home. Return or keep it?
Story of my life. Another explanation for why I have so many clothes. I don't like to shop and I don't like to try things on, so I usually just grab something that looks nice on the hanger, then I go home and it doesn't fit. Then I'm too lazy to look for the receipt or go back to the store. I haven't quite mastered the concept that just because something is in my size, doesn't necessarily mean it fits.

10. Hats: yes or no?
Sometimes, now that I have contacts. They don't work with glasses at all. And woolen caps make my hair all staticky and awful.

I dreamt this morning that I was at Meijers and there was a CD player there that was loud enough to play in the whole store. I got everyone at Meijers dancing to Pink Martini's "Brazil". It was very satisfying.

I think I was in that half-asleep, half-awake state, because the song was playing on my CD player at the time. That's a weird state.

1. Ever considered just deleting your Blog and not doing it anymore? What prompted that and what stopped you?
I've never really thought about stopping altogether. I've thought about taking a break, but I haven't really done it except when I couldn't get to a computer. I like talking about myself so much that I need an outlet, I guess. And I'm looking forward to blogging about France so much, that I don't think it could stop altogether until I was done with that. We shall see.

2. How about a quick review of the last movie you saw?
I feel like I saw something else afterwards, but I saw Duck Soup on video this weekend. It was excellent as always and I want to make Alex watch it.

3. What's your favorite gadget? Are you lusting for any new ones? Will you ever be satisified???
I guess my computer is a gadget, but it's a big, bulky desktop. So I am lusting after a laptop, a cell phone, a digital camera, a good scanner, and a copy of Photoshop. I guess Photoshop isn't really a gadget. Could I have a PDA? I don't know what good they are, but they sound gadgety, so I want one. I think I shall never be satisfied.

4. Saturday night I played "UNO" for the first time in years, I mean it has been over 10 years since I played it. It was great fun, but it really made me want to learn how to play Backgammon again. What "table game" do you enjoy playing most with other people? Have you played it lately?
Trivial Pursuit is my favorite board game of all. I like to show off my enormous amounts of useless knowledge. I prefer to have some real competition, though, because I always feel guilty when I'm playing with someone who doesn't know any trivia.

5. About a year ago I was obsessed with loosing weight, and I dropped pretty low before I got a handle on things (I've actually gained about 8 pounds of it back, and it is still a struggle sometimes to not try to loose it). Thankfully, I like fattening sweets and buttery popcorn too much to live like that for too long. Have you ever been obsessed with something so much that it was close to causing you physical or mental harm? If not, have you known anyone else who has?
I don't think so.

6. Did you grow up in a family or community that displayed racist or prejudice attitudes? Did it influence you in any way, either toward or away from those views? How did you manage to avoid it, or did you?
I can't think of any examples. I'm from Ann Arbor, for heaven's sake.

7. Good grief, I am starving! You got anything to eat around here? I just had some Cheez-Its. Yum.

BONUS: What did you tell them? I told them Alf was the only one for me.

I saw My Fair Lady last night at the Croswell Opera House in Adrian. It was okay, except the orchestra STANK as usual (if anyone in charge of decision-making is out there, either raise some money to hire professional musicians or get some canned music, because this crap really takes away from the rest of the performance) and no one could handle any accent. I think that's the most important part of My Fair Lady. If Eliza doesn't have a convincing Cockney accent, Freddy doesn't sound upper-class enough, Alfie Doolittle has a southern-US accent and even Henry Higgins can't talk properly, we have a problem.

I should be an actress, just because I can do accents. The part of Henry Higgins doesn't require any singing per se, so I'll take that one on. Of course, I might get some giggles from the audience when I'm wondering "Why can't a woman... be more like me?"

I went out last night with a couple of fellow assistants from Ann Arbor. On the way there, I was telling myself not to be nervous and not to be that shy little person I sometimes am. I think I went in the wrong direction, though...

I don't know if they noticed or if it was just me being paranoid, but I felt like I talked all the time and wouldn't stop talking about myself. And I just talked and talked without thinking, so and idea would come out of my mouth and I had no idea where it came from or why I decided to say it in the first place. There was no organization or structure to my speech and I was getting off the subject mid-sentence. I felt like I was being very negative but I couldn't stop.

Oh well. If they think I'm a dumbass, they'll think I'm a dumbass. I sort of am.

But Albion still sucks.

I should have known it wasn't you, beloved Blogger. It is Albion who deleted our old GroupWise email accounts and deleted our ability to FTP to our webpages while they were at it. Doh! Oh, we gave you a year of free hosting... but we didn't think you'd want to update at any point during that year... I need a new host.

So here I am, still blogging, even though it's not publishing...

Why haven't I been able to publish my blog through Blogger for the past two days? Is it their fault or Albion's? Has anyone else (outside the Albion system) been having trouble? Why am I even writing this, if it's not going to get published? Maybe there will be a freak miracle.

1. What is your lineage? Where are your ancestors from?
I am 1/4 English, 1/4 German, and the other half is a mixture of French, Irish, Scotch-Irish, English, Dutch, etc.

2. Of those countries, which would you most like to visit?
Uh, France. Wait, I'm going there already. I've visited England and Scotland, so I guess I'd like to go to Germany. But I'm afraid. They speak German there.

3. Which would you least like to visit? Why?
Germany. They speak German there. I am very conflicted on the whole Germany issue. Maybe I should go to Brazil instead. I speak Portuguese, don't I?

4. Do you do anything during the year to celebrate or recognize your heritage?
Uh, we go to Frankenmuth. That's sort of like celebrating my heritage, in an incredibly tourist-trappy way. Sometimes I celebrate Scottish stuff with the other Fannahs...

5. Who were the first ancestors to move to your present country (parents, grandparents, etc)?
First? I believe it was Barnard McNitt, who came from Ulster in 1720. Why do I know that? Because I am a big nerd and the daughter of a big genealogy nerd. For more information about me (as if you care), you can visit this awful website I made for class in 1998.

Guess what is 25 days from today?

Onesome: Lions. How late do you lie in, or are you an early bird? "fess up, no lying here.
I like to sleep in, but sunlight often wakes me up. With real, working shutters (you wouldn't know them - they don't seem to have them in this country), I could sleep forever.

Twosome: Tigers. What brings out the tiger in you? Interpret this how
ever you want, just warn us if it is rated other than pg *grin*.
Hardy har har. Um, not much. Frosted Flakes?

Threesome: Bears. Bare it all for us. We always complain about the parts
of our bodies we don't like. So here, tell us your favorite part of your
body...
My favorite? Hmm. My eyes, I guess? I have also been told I have a cute butt, but that's a horrible thing to like - you can't even see your own!

Back in the day, fraternities had house mothers. They did things like keep them in line and, because there was a lady in the house, they had to behave themselves and act like gentlemen. Or at least, that's my fantasy. They probably had no more control over the frat boys than we do today.

Let's go throw that idea at Uncle Pete. We could create five or six jobs (aren't there any little old ladies in town who want to come beat fratboys into submission?) and try to make fratboys into some semblance of human beings. Maybe we could even make them wear ties. It's worth a shot.

Everyone and everything always says "be yourself". I'm not sure I agree with that. If we didn't try, occasionally, to be someone else, I don't think we'd ever change or adapt. There's a certain amount of make-believe required in life. Personally, I'm glad that I'm not always myself.