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And may the British burn my land if I can't deliver to your hand a resolution on independency!
Some people seem to think that New Year's resolutions are the sort of thing that should be announced, like, in the first couple of days of January. Well, here at srah blah blah, we ain't people¹. So here is our interrelated web of resolution:
WHEREAS It is the beginning of a new year; and
WHEREAS "People" expect this sort of thing; and
WHEREAS I should probably get up off the couch and work on some self-improvement; therefore be it
RESOLVED:
- That I will fit into this one pair of jeans that I can technically fit into now, and can even zip up, if I sit down on the couch and wiggle a lot and hold my breath for minutes at a time and strain the pants and myself to the point where - when I remove the pants - pants-marks are left on my skin. So... no, they don't fit now. I would like them to fit in such a way that I could wear them out of the house without wanting to die.
- That I will spend less money on terribly frivolous things² and be more sensible in my spending.
- That I will take my lunch to work, which will (hopefully) support resolutions I and II.
- That I will get back into the habit of walking, which will hopefully help with resolution I. I will probably not actually engage in this until the Team [University I Work At] walk/run training program starts up again later this month, but still.
- That I will drink more water, which will support resolution I and - if it means that I'm not thirsty when I walk past Starbucks - resolution II. And will accompany resolution III.
- That I will finish the AFI Top 100. This is not related to anything else on the list, but it's still very important.
- That these United Colonies are, and of right ought to be, free and independent States, that they are absolved from all allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain is, and ought to be, totally dissolved.
¹ We are a shimmering, glowing star in the cinema firmament. It says so, right here.
² After-Christmas sales are making me fail at this... to the EXTREME!! It should get better over the next few months when it's too cold out to drive to the mall. Unless I shop online...
srah - Wednesday, 7 January 2009 - 5:10 PM
Tags: holidays, new year, resolutions
Dude, with this economy you should be spending more, not less, on frivolous things. At this critical time you should be helping the economy, and thus the country. Which in turn will help keep us from turning back to the British for help. Or something.
(Actually, I want to do that too.)