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'He reminds me of my father.' 'Was your father ugly?'

Before I set out on my walk tonight, I went through my purse and decided what to throw into my backpack.

  • Wallet, since I didn't know which direction I was going to go and I might need to buy something to drink in this heat.
  • Cell phone, mostly so I could call people while I walk and forget that I'm walking.
  • Keys to get in and out of my apartment.
  • Camera... I never know whether to bring my camera, because it's extra weight that I don't need to carry but on the other hand, I always seem to need it when I don't have it. But back on that first hand again, I hardly ever see anything particularly interesting when I go on my walks.

Maybe you should take it, my brain told me. You might see a deer.

A deer?, I thought back. Why would there be deer here in the middle of town? It's not like I live next to a meadow out on the outskirts of town anymore. And why do I want a picture of a dumb deer anyway?

So I set off on my walk without my camera. I got about halfway around the circle I was making when I saw some hindquarters sticking out from behind a tree.

Jesus Christ, I thought, That is a freaking enormous dog. That dog's hindquarters have to be, like, four feet tall.

I started to panic when I noticed that there was no fence to keep the huge dog in, but then I also started to notice that the hindquarters were awfully delicate for a dog, so I inched forward and - sure enough - it was a deer. It wouldn't be so strange, except that it was the exact example that my brain had chosen for "exciting thing that I could see on my walk." I stared at the deer for a while and the deer stared back. I didn't know what to do! I couldn't take a picture of it. There was no one else on the road so I couldn't point and say, "Hey look! A deer!" which was my only other plan and the only other way for me to say "Hey! This is my deer. I found it. It's mine. I have a deer." So I stared a little longer. I would like to say it was like the moving scene in The Queen where Queen Elizabeth II stares down a stag on the grounds of Balmoral, but it was much more like John Cleese bonding with zoo animals in Fierce Creatures. I am more John Cleese than Helen Mirren, I'm afraid.

Eventually I had to stop staring at the deer, because he seemed to have no plans to go anywhere and one of us had to make the first move. So I started walking again. About six houses down, another deer came running through the front yard, bounded across the street and ran down into the back yard of another house. It was a deer infestation and I didn't have my camera!

Now I will be sure to take my camera along whenever I go for a walk. That will ensure that I will never see anything interesting on a walk ever again.

srah - Thursday, 9 August 2007 - 9:02 PM
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Comments (20)

gravatar Aunt Pam - August 9, 2007 - 9:38 PM -

I don't think this means you need to take your camera on every walk (I agree this ensures you will never see anything interesting). I think this means if you wonder if you should bring your camera on a walk you need to listen to that small voice that says, "Hey! Take the camera! You might see a deer!" (or a monkey!)

P. S. I loved Helen Mirren in her role as The Queen and that scene with the stag was amazing.

gravatar Tony - August 9, 2007 - 10:33 PM -

Hmm...cameraphone? Problem solved. Just a tip from your friendly engineer of the north.

gravatar srah - August 9, 2007 - 10:41 PM -

While I was out walking, I listened to a voice mail from Robin about how it was time for us to get new phones and how I might want to get a cameraphone. This was ALSO before the deer infestation!

gravatar Your ARWYDK - August 10, 2007 - 9:42 AM -

Saw a trio of them bounding through the U-M North Campus the other night, reproaching with their grace the sterility of Saarinen's bullying modernism.

gravatar srah - August 10, 2007 - 9:54 AM -

You have deer too!

gravatar katie - August 10, 2007 - 1:10 PM -

I have decided not to believe a single word of this story. You can say you saw a bunch of deer, but where's the proof, eh?? EH???

Actually, I believe you.

Maybe the deer was wishing it had brought its camera so it could take a picture of you.

gravatar srah - August 10, 2007 - 1:15 PM -

That's a fun idea.

gravatar Tony - August 10, 2007 - 1:42 PM -

Ironically, riding in this morning I saw 4 deer along the side of the road on North Campus. Alas, I couldn't stop to take a picture (with a cameraphone, mind you) lest I be late for my meeting.

I should add that deer aren't the only thing I've seen lately. Raccoons, beavers, possums (opossums?) are regular visitors as well. In fact, a possum (an opossum) was 'jogging' along Plymouth Road at midnight earlier this week. Guess it needed a late-night run.

gravatar srah - August 10, 2007 - 1:51 PM -

Aw. I am picturing it wearing a sweatband and shorts and running on its hind legs.

gravatar bob - August 10, 2007 - 8:44 PM -

The deer are out to get you.

And I laughed out loud at The Queen reference. Helen Mirren would be so lucky.

gravatar Cari - August 11, 2007 - 1:41 AM -

hehehe. You need a cameraphone! Mine doesn't take the best pictures, but they're better than not capturing a moment at all!

gravatar EV - August 13, 2007 - 5:56 PM -

Yes, if you have a camera phone, you can do things like I did while waiting in line for Harry Potter, which is take a picture of'Screw It, Let's Do It' by Richard Branson on the Virgin Megastore shelf right next to 'Night' by Elie Weisel.

gravatar jamelah - August 13, 2007 - 6:58 PM -

Heheheh... awesome. Things like this happen when you don't have a camera, it's true.

Also, judging by your comments, apparently all the wildlife live close to North Campus. All I ever see is a bunch of crazy squirrels (I believe the squirrels in Ann Arbor are all completely insane). Oh, and that one cat that freaks me out.

gravatar srah - August 13, 2007 - 7:05 PM -

You need to hang out on Nizzorth Cizzampus, I guess.

gravatar Tony - August 13, 2007 - 7:19 PM -

Word, it's a happening place up here. All kinds of flora and fauna. And home to the nerdisaurus engineerus. We all trace our lineage roughly back to MacGyver.

gravatar srah - August 13, 2007 - 7:22 PM -

Engineers are everywhere! MacGyver must be as much of a manwhore as James Bond.

gravatar Tony - August 13, 2007 - 7:31 PM -

That...or the fact that when you've got skillz like MacGyver, you're pretty much guaranteed to avoid extinction. And be able to fix most major indoor plumbing fixtures. With gum.

The more I think about it, when the apocalypse happens the three people that I predict will be left standing are Bond, MacGyver, and Chuck Norris.

gravatar srah - August 13, 2007 - 7:38 PM -

And Neville Longbottom.

gravatar srah - August 17, 2007 - 12:59 PM -

I saw the deer again!

gravatar Tony - August 17, 2007 - 1:25 PM -

In keeping with the theme of wild kingdom, I also had another siting. Seems as though this deer topic has brought everyone out of the woodwork (HA!).

Story is as follows...I was biking home from lab at an hour that I need not divulge unless I want to really proclaim my nerdiness. Apparently there was a beaver sleeping next to the roadway and did not hear my bike tires approaching. I thought it was just a rock or patch of dead grass since it was pretty dark. When I was right next to it, the thing jumped a few inches off the ground and took off toward the woods. I had to kind of do a double-take because of the hour (and actually it's surprising that I didn't end up crashing because of that). But that's the first time I've startled wildlife while it was sleeping.

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