Divided loyalties

Reasons why Michigan is better than Ohio:

  1. When the two states almost went to war over the city of Toledo, Ohio got that city and Michigan got the WHOLE Upper Peninsula and all of the lovely copper therein. And Toledo is basically more Michigan than Ohio anyway, so Michigan won altogether.
  2. Michigan produces a lot of delicious fruit.
  3. Wolverines are fierce and tenacious; buckeyes are poisonous nuts.
  4. Say what you will about the state of our largest city and about our crappy roads, but at least in Michigan, I've never heard anyone request Poke Salad Annie on the radio¹. Poke Salad Annie is not a song you request! It is a song that is inflicted upon human beings from time to time by radio DJs, who are all space aliens, in order to destroy the human race! If there were anything remotely humorous about Poke Salad Annie I would send it in to Dave Barry's Bad Songs list, because it is an aberration against nature! If anything is destroying the American family today it is Poke Salad Annie! If you want to ban something, Tom Brinkman, ban that goddamned song.

Reasons why Ohio is better than Michigan:

  1. Um... Michigan never had JERRY SPRINGER as mayor of a major city!

–––––
¹ That I remember.

srah - Tuesday, 13 June 2006 - 7:33 PM
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Comments (21)

gravatar Noor - June 13, 2006 - 7:38 PM -

5. Michigan's governor was born in Canada.

gravatar Your ARWYDK - June 13, 2006 - 7:47 PM -

On the Ohio side:

2) Michigan has no major Impressionist paintings rendered in topiary form.

--Raised in Toledo, living in A-squared

gravatar srah - June 13, 2006 - 9:36 PM -

I'm not sure which side this statue goes on (I still haven't seen it because I always exit I-75 at I-70, before you get to the statue).

gravatar Aunt Pam aka Black Sheep of the family - June 13, 2006 - 10:38 PM -

Reasons Ohio is way better than Michigan:

1. Cleveland Art Museum is way better than the DIA

2. Spring arrives nearly a month or more earlier in So. Ohio.

3. Gas is cheaper

4. Superior roadways

5. That marvelous bistro in srahtown

6. Ohio is NOT Michigan

7. And yes . . . Go Buckeyes!


Oh . . . and said statue is on the Ohio side. It's sad and humorous at the same time. Cousin B. has a dandy little picture of it. ;-)

gravatar srah - June 13, 2006 - 11:07 PM -

I don't know why it never occurred to me to call this place "srahtown" before. I like it.

gravatar chrispy - June 14, 2006 - 10:01 AM -

Forget it sarah.....it's srahtown....

gravatar Greg - June 14, 2006 - 10:04 AM -

Wolverines also have adamantium bones.

gravatar Noor - June 14, 2006 - 11:23 AM -

regarding the statue - OH MY GOD.

I thought the cross in IL was bad - http://www.flickr.com/photos/dorkyspice/158325699/

gravatar jamelah - June 14, 2006 - 11:31 AM -

Michigan is better than Ohio because is Ohio shaped like a hand? No. Exactly.

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:07 PM -

The Ohio Congressional delegation was steadfast in blocking Michigan from attaining statehood.

Hmph.

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:09 PM -

Former United States President John Quincy Adams, who at the time represented Massachusetts in Congress, backed Michigan's claim. In 1833, when Congress rejected Michigan's request for a convention, Adams summed up his opinion on the dispute: "Never in the course of my life have I known a controversy of which all the right so clearly on one side and all the power so overwhelmingly on the other."

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:17 PM -

In modern times, conflict between the states is restricted primarily to the Michigan-Ohio State rivalry in American football,[54] an annual game the U.S. Congress declared "the greatest sports rivalry in history."

Yes, yes, it is.

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:22 PM -

I thought of a plus for Ohio:

As far as I know, Bob Taft did not quote "I Hope You Dance" during his inauguration speech.

gravatar Allison - June 14, 2006 - 12:23 PM -

If dj's are all aliens, is XM radio the way they transmit secret messages? Is Howard Stern really the leader of millions of alien clones?! Where is Will Smith when you need him!

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:24 PM -

Actually, not so much quoting as mentioning. I hate that song.

In her inaugural speech, she said: "We've all heard that song, 'I Hope You Dance'. Well, I hope you dance with your government."

It just sounds dumb.

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:29 PM -

I thought of another one.

Ohio does not have this guy frequently running for important offices like Governor or Attorney General.

gravatar alfie - June 14, 2006 - 12:35 PM -

Wait....why am I supporting Ohio?

gravatar Allison - June 15, 2006 - 8:02 PM -

Cleveland, Cincinnati, Columbus.

gravatar Aunt Pam - June 15, 2006 - 10:29 PM -

Alfie, you are supporting Ohio because of the offical Srahtown designation . . . the residence of your beloved sibling. (Ever notice how much she likes red??? It is DESTINY I tell you!)

p.s. it is indeed the greatest rivalry ever!

gravatar Amy - June 22, 2006 - 9:56 PM -

My loyalty is still with my home state (Michigan) not my residence (Ohio). Points in favor of Michigan:

No evidence of tampering in the last two Presidential elections in Michigan.

We also don't have a giant Jesus emerging from the Earth in Michigan, as they do here in Cincinnati (sorry, no pics yet).

The summers are later, but I can understand everyone - unlike some of the Kentuky-ans I've met around here.

For Ohio: The giant Desdemona Music Festival this weekend.

All that said, I think liberals should move to Ohio instead of Canada....

gravatar Amy - June 22, 2006 - 10:00 PM -

here he is http://www.flickr.com/photos/kevinyezbick/14687433/

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