'He's a mild and lazy guy!'

Justin and I are going to make the epic cinematic masterpiece Srah, The Flying Pig. And when I say Justin and I are going to make it, I mean "Justin mostly ignored me as I went insane planning this horrible horrible movie." Justin is an up-and-coming young director and I'm going to hitch a ride on that star no matter how many times he tries to pry my fingers loose.

The baddie is Richard Simmons in goth makeup, platform shoes and with chartreuse horns that he claims are fuchsia. The title role will be played by Christopher Walken in a diaper - "like Cupid with a pig nose. And a flame thrower."

I also definitely think it should involve a scene with someone's pants being kicked while they're not in them.

"Take that! Hiiiiiii-yah! Hiiiiiiii-yah! Grrrr, take that!"
"Uh... dude? I'm over here."

Would you like to contribute to the monstrosity? Scenes? Characters? Production funding?

srah - Tuesday, 6 April 2004 - 11:35 PM
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Comments (11)

gravatar alfie - April 6, 2004 - 11:59 PM -

I think we'd probably pay you not to make it.

gravatar Urs - April 7, 2004 - 2:45 AM -

Ok, my co-worker James and I totally had the most awesome idea for a movie this summer - could you possibly have a scene in some corporate records storage facility (a warehouse) where people grab oozies from under desks and shoot them with one hand, sideways while papers fly everywhere? It'll be SO cool

gravatar Smuj - April 7, 2004 - 7:04 AM -

It needs explosions. And a car chase scene. And lots and lots of gratuitous sex.

gravatar srah - April 7, 2004 - 7:06 AM -

It will definitely be oozies rather than Uzis!

gravatar alfie - April 7, 2004 - 8:05 AM -

No rats with lampshades on their heads pretending to be Elvis. It's been done.

gravatar Smuj - April 7, 2004 - 10:00 AM -

I'll contribute $10 if I can get a cameo as a ninja or a rock star.

gravatar Urs - April 7, 2004 - 10:19 AM -

no making fun of me because I can't spell!

gravatar Somewhat - April 7, 2004 - 11:43 AM -

Could you have a scene where someone murders their lover to the accompaniment of "You Always Hurt the One You Love"?

gravatar Justin - April 7, 2004 - 9:50 PM -

The fuchsia horns were my idea! But not the flamethrower.

gravatar katie - April 8, 2004 - 8:11 AM -

Can I be in one of the gratuitous scenes with Obi-Wan?


Also, I think George Bush should be part of a travelling troupe of can-can dancers...

gravatar alfie - October 12, 2004 - 8:35 PM -

Re-reading your archives, I think this should be Reader's Choice.

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