Long ago in days of yore/ It all began with a god named Thor/ There were Vikings and boats/ And some plans for a furniture store

nablopomo2008color.jpgI went to IKEA today to look for a particular object (I'd tell you what, but it's a Christmas present). It's the first time that I've ever done this, as I usually go to IKEA and end up browsing through the whole store, but this time we arrived an hour before closing and weren't sure whether to look in the "kitchen and dining" area or the "cooking and eating" area of the stores, which are on two different floors.

I went to the cooking/eating area first, but couldn't find the object anywhere. So I asked two IKEA employees where to find it, and they told me it would be upstairs. After asking them, it occurred to me that I had never even seen IKEA employees before I had need of one. I thought they only had employees at the cash registers and that in the rest of the store, you were on your own. Once I became aware of their presence, they seemed to be everywhere, but before that they managed to blend into the clean Svedish woodwork. I'm pretty sure they were Oompa-Loompas, in that they only came out of the walls when they were called for, and also they gave their answers in the form of a song that pointed out all of my personal flaws.

P.S. I am supposed to inform you that this enormous wall hanging is on sale for $5 at the West Chester, Ohio IKEA if you would like to buy it. You should buy them so that my neighbor doesn't go back and buy enough of them to cover all the walls in his apartment.

srah - Sunday, 23 November 2008 - 9:51 PM
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Comments (1)

gravatar Craig - November 24, 2008 - 8:27 AM -

Don't get me started on Ooma Loompas. They don't just point out your personal flaws, they're flat out racist, too. (Come on, if you sang one of their songs and told people they could be happy if they live like white people do--instead of like Oompa Loompas--you wouldn't even finish the song before you were having a sit down with HR.)

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