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I can't seem to make piracy pay

Song of Perfect Propriety
by Dorothy Parker

Oh, I should like to ride the seas,
A roaring buccaneer;
A cutlass banging at my knees,
A dirk behind my ear.
And when my captives' chains would clank
I'd howl with glee and drink,
And then fling out the quivering plank
And watch the beggars sink.

I'd like to straddle gory decks,
And dig in laden sands,
And know the feel of throbbing necks
Between my knotted hands.
Oh, I should like to strut and curse
Among my blackguard crew...
But I am writing little verse,
As little ladies do.

Oh, I should like to dance and laugh
And pose and preen and sway,
And rip the hearts of men in half,
And toss the bits away.
I'd like to view the reeling years
Through unastonished eyes,
And dip my finger-tips in tears,
And give my smiles for sighs.

I'd stroll beyond the ancient bounds,
And tap at fastened gates,
And hear the prettiest of sound--
The clink of shattered fates.
My slaves I'd like to bind with thongs
That cut and burn and chill...
But I am writing little songs,
As little ladies will.

I spent this morning grabbing members of my family and telling them they'd have to walk the plank if they didn't tell me which of the March sisters they would be if they had to be one. No one takes my pirate ways seriously; answers included "March 7th", "Pedro", and "Not the one that dies".

srah - Friday, 27 June 2003 - 8:53 AM
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Comments (2)

gravatar katie - June 27, 2003 - 9:47 AM -

Fabulous. Absolutely fabulous.

Question: you know on the show "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" when they sing the irish drinking song? I read this poem to that tune. It fits perfectly.

gravatar alfie - June 27, 2003 - 8:05 PM -

Pedro March is the most interesting character in the book. She's so fascinating. That's why she's my favorite. Although I agree with our parents, March 7th and 'not the one who dies' are also interesting characters.

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